Apostolic Friends Forum - Are we too BUSY

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Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni (Post 586834)

But I think...what is the sacrifice? Relationships are all there is. This is the first time I haven't made a dozen or more friends. I have been in Texas two years this month and the only friends I have made are those from AFF that i have met and travelled to see, or they have seen me.

The churches I have been to are very closed off. They have the friends they have always had, do things the way they've always done them, and do not think about including others. When you go out of your way to try to get friends together it is so diffiuclt and even if they say they will do it they beg off before it actually takes place.

I guess Texas is an animal all her own. Not very friendly. They are a bit arrogant and snobbish. Just my observation out of the past two years.

Blessings, Rhoni

Its not Texas it is the church your in. I am in the same situation here. This is probably the friendliest church I have ever been to "inside" the church. But NO fellowship outside of it.

Each church has it's unique dynamics and I am facing the same thing you are, but being older it is not the issue for me that it would be if I was 20 years or so younger.

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scott Hutchinson (Post 586828)

Well if me and my wife were closer,we'd get together with yall.

Thank you Brother Scott.

Re: Are we too BUSY

I would fellowship more, but it is such a big pain in the butt to get up and get dressed, clean the house...ya know make sure I don't bring contempt upon myself, my education or my career choice.

Sometimes it's not worth the effort.

...but then again, maybe I should invite people who are less fortunate, then I will feel good while they are a bit uncomfortable.

:D

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carpenter (Post 586949)

What happened to similar friends, with similar intersts who could care less what job or education you have:friend

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrsMcD (Post 586793)

I think people care but not enough to make a sacrifice.

I would agree, (BTW hi Karen). :friend

You make time for that which is important to you.

A small but very significant part of why I became licensed with the ACN is the fellowship.

Genuine, real, mutually supportive, without agenda fellowship.

15-20 pastors and ministers get together every 5 weeks or so in Houston, for dinner and fellowship followed by unscripted round table discussions, prayer, and support.

What a concept...

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by James Griffin (Post 586976)

I have been wondering why you haven't been posting. :friend

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni (Post 586834)

But I think...what is the sacrifice? Relationships are all there is. This is the first time I haven't made a dozen or more friends. I have been in Texas two years this month and the only friends I have made are those from AFF that i have met and travelled to see, or they have seen me.

The churches I have been to are very closed off. They have the friends they have always had, do things the way they've always done them, and do not think about including others. When you go out of your way to try to get friends together it is so diffiuclt and even if they say they will do it they beg off before it actually takes place.

I guess Texas is an animal all her own. Not very friendly. They are a bit arrogant and snobbish. Just my observation out of the past two years.

Blessings, Rhoni

I don't think it's Texas in general, my opinion is that it's the personality of the city that can make it closed or open.

For instance, a city like Phoenix, which is growing by leaps and bounds is a very friendly city, in my experience. I think the reason for that is that there are so many other transplants, everyone is in the same boat. And, then a city like Battle Creek, Michigan, is not so friendly, mainly because most of the people who live there grew up there, and their circles of influence are firmly established.

That's what I love about Omaha, it's a growing city, and many of the people with whom I work and in the neighborhood in which I live are transplants, as well. But, even the Omahans who grew up here are very friendly.

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Michael Phelps (Post 587016)

I agree. We have never encountered anyone here or the towns nearby where we frequent that arent friendly.. and churches the same.. we go to a church of over 1000 and there is not a single sunday at least 50 people dont shake our hands and ask how we are and usually invite us to their home or come to ours or go out to dinner.. its a very friendly church and town... our neighbors constantly coming over to check on us if they dont see us for a while... we have 3 neighbors who every time Rob heads out for work come by and offer any help needed to me and the kids while he is gone. One of my friends down the road her husband and her have come by I dont know how many times to offer help for things I was unable to fix. Even our landlord will call and check on us from time to time when Rob is gone to make sure we dont need anything.

For it being a suburb of a very large city we have had nothing but wonderful experiences here and I am so thankful I am home! My experience has been totally opposite of Rhonis... Florida and some of the other states we have lived were horrible.. in florida the only people we really knew at all after almost 3 yrs was our pastor and his wife... and one other couple... and the neighbors were horrid!!! LOL

Re: Are we too BUSY

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni (Post 586965)

What happened to similar friends, with similar intersts who could care less what job or education you have:friend

Well, to have similar friends with similar interest would mean it matters to us what jobs and educations we have.

Kind of a viscious circle dontcha think?

On second thought, I don't get together with my friends because several of their wives are the ones who walk into my house and immediately look under the Oriental rug to check the label (I actually had a friend's wife do this...I couldn't believe it.).

:D

Re: Are we too BUSY

I think as you get older it is harder to develop meaningful relationships with friends. Friends you have a history with or have shared life experiences with are hard to replace. I know I went through a period in my life that every friendship in the church I developed, seemed to move away. Either being transferred or called to the ministry and moved. I started developing friendships with people I worked with and have some great friends from that time in my life. We are now in a new and much larger church, and they have been very friendly to us, but we really do not desire to fellowship too much, being very busy with our famlies and travel. I do think you have to reach out and show yourself as friendly to attract other friends.