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-   -   Pregnant at 16 by her pastor! (https://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com/showthread.php?t=12151)

StMark 02-04-2008 12:33 PM
Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Pregnant at 16 at the hands of her pastor; what's a girl to do?

February 4, 2008

DEAR ABBY: I have a big problem. I am 16 years old, have a good job and do well in school. I go to a Christian nondenominational church every Sunday and enjoy that, too.

The problem is my pastor. “Reverend Ron” is 48, married, and has children and grandchildren. We have become attracted to each other and have secretly become a couple since last fall.

Every Monday night, after I get off work, I go over to my church and meet Reverend Ron in his office where we have sex. We agreed to tell no one, so as not to shame ourselves or our families.

Six weeks ago, I found out I was pregnant. I haven't told him yet, and we continue with our Monday night meetings. Abortion is not an option, but neither is shaming my family, much less the whole church. Abby, what do I do?

– In True Love
in Washington

http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniont..._1c04abby.html[/quote]

Ron 02-04-2008 12:35 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Uh, that Ron isn't me!!!

StMark 02-04-2008 12:35 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniont..._1c04abby.html


Here's a better link

StMark 02-04-2008 12:36 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ron (Post 379148)
Uh, that Ron isn't me!!!


better not be fweeeeewwweee!

COOPER 02-04-2008 12:58 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
That nasty man needs prison time!

Hoovie 02-04-2008 12:59 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
I'll be surprised if this thread does'nt turn the perpetrator into an "Apostolic".

dizzyde 02-04-2008 01:00 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
This is just tragic.

Margies3 02-04-2008 01:00 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by COOPER (Post 379190)
That nasty man needs prison time!
That nasty man will probably GET prison time!!

If I was his wife, he might want to consider self-castration!

seguidordejesus 02-04-2008 01:02 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by StMark (Post 379146)
Pregnant at 16 at the hands of her pastor; what's a girl to do?


http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniont..._1c04abby.html
[/QUOTE]

May want to change the bolded above.

COOPER 02-04-2008 01:02 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dizzyde (Post 379196)
This is just tragic.
I like Abby's reply:


Quote:
DEAR IN TRUE LOVE: The first thing you must do is tell your mother what you have told me. If there is any “shaming,” it should not be directed at you, your family or your church. You are 16, idealistic and inexperienced. “Reverend Ron,” however, is an adult who has literally abused his “sacred” trust to you, his congregation and his God. He had so little concern for your welfare that he didn't even use birth control. This is not how grown men show “true love.” You cannot hide this secret forever. At some point the truth will be revealed. Tell your mother now, so responsible adults who love you can give you the support you so desperately need. If you're afraid to speak to your mother alone, then have a friend with you when you do it. The only thing you cannot do is remain silent.

pelathais 02-04-2008 01:09 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover (Post 379195)
I'll be surprised if this thread does'nt turn the perpetrator into an "Apostolic".
Why the cynicism Brother Hoover? There's nothing to indicate that the man involved is an "Apostolic" of any kind.

Just playing the numbers, since he's openly a "father and grandfather" we can rule out one denomination; but the likelihood is still greatest that he's not "Apostolic." In fact, I've never known an Apostolic pastor to keep Monday office hours. Of course, some advocates of the WwPF will say that this kind of thing goes on "all the time" in Apostolic churches where a longer sleeve length isn't preached.

This is just a sad scenario that has been with us since the dawn of human memory.

StMark 02-04-2008 01:09 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover (Post 379195)
I'll be surprised if this thread does'nt turn the perpetrator into an "Apostolic".


??????


not following ...

Margies3 02-04-2008 01:11 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
in theory that sounds like good advice, Coop. But I wonder how her mother will actually react? I feel for this poor child.

I wonder if someone will direct her to something like a local Crisis Pregnancy Center (that's NOT like Planned Parenthood. At CPC they do not do abortions. They talk to the girls about either keeping the baby and raising it or else releasing the child for adoption) The CPC here is very good about giving support in situations like this. They would get someone involved to go with her to talk to her parents to let tell them about the pregnancy if she felt the need for it.

DividedThigh 02-04-2008 01:13 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
i wish the pastor dude would go to jail for what he has and is doing and that this would not be voiced abroad, what a tragedy, dt

dizzyde 02-04-2008 01:13 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by pelathais (Post 379213)
Why the cynicism Brother Hoover? There's nothing to indicate that the man involved is an "Apostolic" of any kind.

Just playing the numbers, since he's openly a "father and grandfather" we can rule out one denomination; but the likelihood is still greatest that he's not "Apostolic." In fact, I've never known an Apostolic pastor to keep Monday office hours. Of course, some advocates of the WwPF will say that this kind of thing goes on "all the time" in Apostolic churches where a longer sleeve length isn't preached.

This is just a sad scenario that has been with us since the dawn of human memory.
Mine always has! The only concession to Monday is we open the office an hour later, 9:30 instead of 8:30.

Sorry thread jacking!!! :toofunny

Hoovie 02-04-2008 01:37 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by pelathais (Post 379213)
Why the cynicism Brother Hoover? There's nothing to indicate that the man involved is an "Apostolic" of any kind.

Just playing the numbers, since he's openly a "father and grandfather" we can rule out one denomination; but the likelihood is still greatest that he's not "Apostolic." In fact, I've never known an Apostolic pastor to keep Monday office hours. Of course, some advocates of the WwPF will say that this kind of thing goes on "all the time" in Apostolic churches where a longer sleeve length isn't preached.

This is just a sad scenario that has been with us since the dawn of human memory.
Quote:
Originally Posted by StMark (Post 379214)
??????


not following ...
Pel I agree... my post was meant to be sarcastic!! (seems some think the totality of spiritual abuse resides in Apostolic Churches) Sorry!

LadyRev 02-04-2008 01:43 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover (Post 379195)
I'll be surprised if this thread does'nt turn the perpetrator into an "Apostolic".
Are you insinuating that it never or rarely happens among "apostolics" or that people on this forum just like to pick on apostolics more than other denoms? Which is it?

Perps come in all denoms.

Sherri 02-04-2008 01:55 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by pelathais (Post 379213)
Why the cynicism Brother Hoover? There's nothing to indicate that the man involved is an "Apostolic" of any kind.

Just playing the numbers, since he's openly a "father and grandfather" we can rule out one denomination; but the likelihood is still greatest that he's not "Apostolic." In fact, I've never known an Apostolic pastor to keep Monday office hours. Of course, some advocates of the WwPF will say that this kind of thing goes on "all the time" in Apostolic churches where a longer sleeve length isn't preached.

This is just a sad scenario that has been with us since the dawn of human memory.
My husband (in fact, the whole staff) is here on Mondays; it's our very busiest day! Eddie was here this morning at 4:30 AM!!

tamor 02-04-2008 02:01 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Margies3 (Post 379197)
That nasty man will probably GET prison time!!

If I was his wife, he might want to consider self-castration!

If I were her mother, he might want to consider self-castration!

Hoovie 02-04-2008 02:07 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyRev (Post 379251)
Are you insinuating that it never or rarely happens among "apostolics" or that people on this forum just like to pick on apostolics more than other denoms? Which is it?

Perps come in all denoms.
Yeah that. And i was not exempting myself entirely either. Perhaps we rightly hold our own to a high standard...? I dunno

revshoney 02-04-2008 02:08 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Where is Lorena Bobbitt when we need her most?????

revshoney 02-04-2008 02:09 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
This kind of thing happens more often than not I am afraid......

pelathais 02-04-2008 02:10 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sherri (Post 379265)
My husband (in fact, the whole staff) is here on Mondays; it's our very busiest day! Eddie was here this morning at 4:30 AM!!
Man! You folks are destroying the stereotypes I had. I used to look forward to Mondays because it was considered a day off in most circumstances. After 3 services or more on Sunday I needed Mondays just to get some shirts cleaned before the next weekend. http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com...cons/icon7.gif

And perhaps we should hijack this thread anyhoo. Bring in some good news or at least gossip about dry cleaning bills. http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com...ons/icon10.gif

Rev 02-04-2008 02:12 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by COOPER (Post 379190)
That nasty man needs prison time!
Knew a guy in Dallas that went to a UPC church that got sent up for molestation - dead in about a month. you don't want to go to the big house for that!

tamor 02-04-2008 02:13 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by revshoney (Post 379286)
This kind of thing happens more often than not I am afraid......
So true....

StMark 02-04-2008 02:17 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by revshoney (Post 379286)
This kind of thing happens more often than not I am afraid......
I think it does in some cirlces.

we just had a case out here- a Pastor of a huge church here in Oakland,CA got a 15 year old girl pregnant. she had the baby when she was 16.

Her mother threatend to go to the law if he didn't give her money. he gave her $400,000!

now here is the bombshell! he was just made the 1st asst. Bishop of COGIC!!! Bishop Blake appointed him!!!! It's unbelievable and everyone is bewildered by it.

I am speechless as to how this man got a pass

rgcraig 02-04-2008 02:21 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
It happens every day in all walks of life's, but I believe one of the attraction to the ministry is the awe and respect of the position.

tamor 02-04-2008 02:26 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by rgcraig (Post 379305)
It happens every day in all walks of life's, but I believe one of the attraction to the ministry is the awe and respect of the position.
Bingo.

Rev 02-04-2008 02:30 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by rgcraig (Post 379305)
It happens every day in all walks of life's, but I believe one of the attraction to the ministry is the awe and respect of the position.
I doubt Billy Cole had to worry about such things.

rgcraig 02-04-2008 02:31 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev (Post 379316)
I doubt Billy Cole had to worry about such things.
Wow - little bashing there, huh?

AUTHORgio 02-04-2008 02:32 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by StMark (Post 379297)
I think it does in some cirlces.

we just had a case out here- a Pastor of a huge church here in Oakland,CA got a 15 year old girl pregnant. she had the baby when she was 16.

Her mother threatend to go to the law if he didn't give her money. he gave her $400,000!

now here is the bombshell! he was just made the 1st asst. Bishop of COGIC!!! Bishop Blake appointed him!!!! It's unbelievable and everyone is bewildered by it.

I am speechless as to how this man got a pass
A pastor's 20 something year old son got a 14 year old girl pregnant in a UPC church. A relative of mine adopted the baby. The only way the girls parents wouldn't press charges was if the guy totally signed off on the baby. Sigh...

Joelel 02-04-2008 02:33 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Both of my sisters had their apostolic pastors try to get them in bed.

KarenJo 02-04-2008 02:34 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
This is why ministry needs to take all the precautions necessary to protect themselves. My Pastor meets with people in the conference room that has glass on two sides. He faces the glass and the person he is talking to has their back to the glass which gives some privacy to the individual he is talking to. I also know of some situations where cameras are used without the sound. This way the conversation can be private but the visual is there if an accusation comes up.

Rev 02-04-2008 02:38 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenJo (Post 379330)
This is why ministry needs to take all the precautions necessary to protect themselves. My Pastor meets with people in the conference room that has glass on two sides. He faces the glass and the person he is talking to has their back to the glass which gives some privacy to the individual he is talking to. I also know of some situations where cameras are used without the sound. This way the conversation can be private but the visual is there if an accusation comes up.
Great ideas!

StMark 02-04-2008 02:40 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joelel (Post 379329)
Both of my sisters had their apostolic pastors try to get them in bed.
O come on now

StMark 02-04-2008 02:40 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenJo (Post 379330)
This is why ministry needs to take all the precautions necessary to protect themselves. My Pastor meets with people in the conference room that has glass on two sides. He faces the glass and the person he is talking to has their back to the glass which gives some privacy to the individual he is talking to. I also know of some situations where cameras are used without the sound. This way the conversation can be private but the visual is there if an accusation comes up.
I think the camera Idea is great

StMark 02-04-2008 02:41 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by AUTHORgio (Post 379326)
A pastor's 20 something year old son got a 14 year old girl pregnant in a UPC church. A relative of mine adopted the baby. The only way the girls parents wouldn't press charges was if the guy totally signed off on the baby. Sigh...

what became of the girl ??

I just read about a story of a 10 yr old getting pregnant by her mother's 40 year old boyfriend.

Admin 02-04-2008 02:42 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Just a reminder this IS NOT a thread to name names or start naming churches.

StMark 02-04-2008 02:43 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Admin (Post 379350)
Just a reminder this IS NOT a thread to name names or start naming churches.

I don't think anyone has

AUTHORgio 02-04-2008 02:54 PM
Re: Pregnant at 16 by her pastor!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by StMark (Post 379345)
what became of the girl ??

I just read about a story of a 10 yr old getting pregnant by her mother's 40 year old boyfriend.
They sent her to where New Beginnings keeps the expectant mothers. And then she returned home. Where most everyone knew nothing. It's been kept hush hush.


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