Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I'm curious to see how people might feel about this. I've been talking to a coworker about stuff for a while and she has visited and enjoys the UPC church in her town (my church and her home are over an hour away so her visiting with me isn't an option for her). She is very hungry but she is hesitant about standards and i've just told her not to worry about all of that for now. I'm afraid the pastor of the church she visits might try to make it an issue b/c they are VERY conservative. It's a tough situation. Anyone ever had visitors "run away" b/c of this?

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

It's easy to say to someone that they shouldn't worry about standards. But, when they see that that majority of the church is dressed differently than they are, and when they see that EVERYONE in leadership, or on the platform is dressed a certain way, it's hard for them NOT to think about standards.

However, having said that, if a person is hungry for more, and they feel what they want to feel, they'll usually stick around.

I'm a bit more liberal than others on this forum, but I do NOT think a church should lower their standards just for the sake of getting more members.

Conversely, I do not think a visitor should let the "standards" drive them away.

Now, I do know of situations where the emphasis on standards, especially for the sake of the visitors, has caused them to seek another assembly.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

From the church I attended in the past, yes... people were run off because of standards being pushed.

The church I am currently attending.... No, I don't know of a single person that has left because of standards being pushed on them. The pastor says you invite them to church, Let them receive what they need from God, they will become faithful in attendance and God will lead and guide them in what they need to do otherwise.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

It's sad that she even knows about standards to begin with. Personally I think things that are meant for regular saints should be taught on a special church only night. Like a wed night bible study and that the saints should understand this is not a soul winning service.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Amen!

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

True, but it doesn't take long for word about a standard keeping church to get around. Unfortunately, dress standards are what far too many churches become known for in their communities. That and the way we run the aisles. LOL!

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I think that what you have told her is good. The truth is that it always becomes an issue to people that do not know why people follow standards. I think that if this pastor makes this an issue for her specifically and she does not see the vision or conviciton from God then I would think that might not be the church for her. I think everyone needs the HG and stuff, but God is going to have her where He wants her so long as she is following Him. JMO

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I know of a man who when vistors visit the church he attends he talks them about their hair and stuff and this man has run people off,he is destructive and hurts people.
Pastors should do the teaching about standards,and God can clean people up.
If people get to Jesus he'll do the cleaning up.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

You know...one of the "good" traits I have heard people say about Mormons is how they dress. We can be known for how we appear and dress without being known for "standards". The problem is in the attitude

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

:thumbsup Excellent Post

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I remember when I hadn't been in the church long a brother walked up to me and looked at my hair and just nodded and said "Yep.....you'll be cutting that hair short soon too like the rest of us"...I was like "What?"

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Bad thing is this fellow is not a pastor and boy he has issues,anyways sad to say but this man does not take pastoral correction,and he is headed for a hard fall.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I always imagined you for a long haired hippy heathen boy..


:ursofunny


jking

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

"And the sign said long haired freaky people need not apply..........."

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

:ursofunny:slaphappy:slaphappy:ursofunny

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

too young to be a hippy though :-)

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Well there you go. I was a long haired freaky person......now I have short hair :ursofunny

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

It wouldn't matter if the whole church kept it's mouth shut on the issue of "standards".

When a persn visits a "standards church"...they see it written as a law imposed on our women.

No way a person not aquainted with Standards could visit a church that inforces strandards and not have serious questions arise about what is taught in this church.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I can vouch for this. Tina attends a great church pastored by an awesome man of God. He is definitely a winner!

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Sometimes people hear about 'standards' outside the church. Many folks watch the Apostolic church in town. You'd be surprised what would be visitors know about your church...

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Is this a UPCI pastor?

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

exactly. it's not like i have ever once mentioned it to her or course. i don't do that in general unless someone asks me why we do this or that. people just know who and what the pentecostals are and they know it will eventually become an issue if they wanted to join.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

agreed. in fact we don't even do that anymore. our focus is about relationship and reaching the lost. can't even remember the last time someone preached standards from the pulpit. i think it was a visiting minister and it didn't go over well with the pastor due to all the visitors. the problem is that this friend of mine lives too far to go to my church and the church in her town is SUPER conservative and probably do preach standards from the pulpit. i'm just worried about what to say/not to say to her. i don't want to make light of standards so to speak but i certainly don't want her to be concerned about that until the Lord decides to deal with her one day....not a pastor.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Yes, many.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Is this a upc?

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

which one? yes both my church and the other church are both upc. why?

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Just curious as to whether attitudes and approaches to ministry are changing in the upci. I hope so.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Standards ARE an issue if you are ever afraid of inviting people to your church because of what they might hear.......

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

i hope so as well. in fact i have only been "in" for 9 years and can tell a HUGE difference. that is..in the churches that are open to change for the better. to others it is a closed discussion...no margin of error, etc. fortunately, my pastor is not like that but the other pastor i speak of is old-school allllll the way. no rings, elbow length sleeves, no tv, etc.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I have learned after many years not to let those types bother me (in person at least). In fact they can be fun to "tweak".

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I never mention standards...

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

you're sick...you're just sick! :ursofunny

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

so wise sis alvear.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Me either, even when I followed them. I always saw and still see them as a personal thing. It is like the bedroom for a married couple, IMO. What happens there should not be talked about, but you can tell what goes on. A healthy relationship is easy to notice just like an unhappy one is easy to notice. Standards are noticable, but I deem them something private that if some one asks me then I say it is a consecration between God and I. That is how I treat the standards I do follow. I do not feel that if I did not do them then I am a sinner, but I do what I do as as sacrifice to God. That is how I see it.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

Really ?!?!?...where have you been hiding...

let me guess ,, you been hiding with alot others on here....

jk


Yes there is a shift......

here is what I don't get, a whole group split off and started their own org. because UPC was getting too liberal, and at the same time others are asking " is the UPC changing"....................:hmmm

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

like i heard bro tenney preach one time that standards were like guard rails on a highway. they didn't get us to our destination, they just help us from falling off at times.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I have never heard that but I made on once that they are like gutter guards in bowling they keep you from the gutter and keep you going straight. I agree I do not think they are really salvational, but I think that they can serve a purpose. I am sure that those that do not follow the standards will also say that they can make a difference in some people.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

While reading your question, my mind was filled with the faces of those that were "run away' when it came to their perceived expectations of adhering to the standards of the church. It really was very upsetting to see ladies that I had witnessed to, gave bible studies to, saw baptized and filled with the Holy Ghost leave because some sister had pulled them aside to discuss their attire and/or make-up.

It never ceased to amaze me the lack of decorum that some folks had while dealing with new converts.

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

I have that message on CD! Love it and Agree with it! Our church NEVER mentions standards. We are mods for the most part and the GOOD thing is that no one looks alike! We have long hair, short hair (on women) long hair, short hair (on men) pants, make-up, jewelry, beards, clean faces, no jewelry, long sleeves, short sleeves, and in the summer, sometimes..NO sleeves! YIKES! LOL .....know what I think? It lets me know that we are GROWING! A young girl last week told our Pastor's wife "The people of this church love me and they don't even KNOW me....but, I FEEL their love" I was sooo proud of our congregation at that moment!

Beth

Re: Should standards be an issue when witnessing?
 

oh i know! :tantrum this makes me soooo mad! in fact if someone had done that with me i don't think i would have lasted.