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Nahum 10-13-2007 10:28 PM

The Truth About Preachers' Kids
 
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.

The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.

rgcraig 10-13-2007 10:31 PM

Right on target!

freeatlast 10-13-2007 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster (Post 271217)
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.

The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.


Welcome back Pastor P. very good post. Our pastor has three wonderful kids. We hope they all will find Christ to be the love of their lives.

SDG 10-13-2007 10:41 PM

Nah ... We're all screwed up

Nahum 10-13-2007 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daniel Alicea (Post 271224)
Nah ... We're all screwed up

Do you really think so?

Hoovie 10-13-2007 10:52 PM

For the record - my wife turned out great. :) :) :)

freeatlast 10-13-2007 11:01 PM

I don't know many preachers kids. I'm sure most are good kids.

I do know one that is a mess...not sure what caused the problem...probably us saints I'm sure ;-)

Nahum 10-13-2007 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by freeatlast (Post 271223)
Welcome back Pastor P. very good post. Our pastor has three wonderful kids. We hope they all will find Christ to be the love of their lives.

It's good to be back!

Who knows for how long?

I'll try to be a good boy though.:hypercoffee

nwlife 10-14-2007 01:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daniel Alicea (Post 271224)
Nah ... We're all screwed up

It all depends on just how far the nail got nailed into the wood.
or how far the drill took the screw into the wood...

HeavenlyOne 10-14-2007 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by freeatlast (Post 271231)
I don't know many preachers kids. I'm sure most are good kids.

I do know one that is a mess...not sure what caused the problem...probably us saints I'm sure ;-)

I heard one preacher admit that his kids were awful, but everything they knew they learned from the saints' kids........LOL!

Hegavmelif 10-14-2007 10:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster (Post 271217)
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.


The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.


Well, the majority of my friends are PK's. The stories that I could tell, and none to compare with those of non-PK's. The truth of the matter is that PK's tend to be given privileges that non-PK's are not given. Think about it. PK's go to all the conferences and convention. They get new wardrobes all year long. They don't hold down the jobs that non-PK's do. It really has everything to do with how PK's are raised.

Good Advise PP...my attitude is if we raise our children with a spirit of servanthood, it will serve them well no matter what vocation they end up with with in life.

MrsMcD 10-14-2007 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster (Post 271217)
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.

The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.

Thanks PP. I couldn't agree more.

MrsMcD 10-14-2007 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hegavmelif (Post 271423)
Well, the majority of my friends are PK's. The stories that I could tell, and none to compare with those of non-PK's. The truth of the matter is that PK's tend to be given privileges that non-PK's are not given. Think about it. PK's go to all the conferences and convention. They get new wardrobes all year long. They don't hold down the jobs that non-PK's do. It really has everything to do with how PK's are raised.

Good Advise PP...my attitude is if we raise our children with a spirit of servanthood, it will serve them well no matter what vocation they end up with with in life.

The saints and their kids could go to conferences and conventions as well. As a pastor's kid, we made it a priority to go to conferences. My siblings and I worked public jobs and were still involved in church ministry. Like you said, it depends on how one is raised. I think saints have opportunities just as well but sometime they don't make it a priority. Some had rather be vacationing at the beach or mountains rather than a conference. JMHO

Nahum 10-14-2007 01:03 PM

My kids have never been pampered. Quite the opposite is true.

Sometimes I worry that they will resent ministry, but I haven't seen any signs of it yet.

RevBuddy 10-14-2007 02:27 PM

If Dan and I are any indication...God help us ALL!! :naughty

MrsMcD 10-14-2007 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RevBuddy (Post 271468)
If Dan and I are any indication...God help us ALL!! :naughty

Tell us about it. :D

TRIPLE E 10-14-2007 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster (Post 271217)
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.

The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.

Amen! Our two boys love God,love going to church and love God's people!My eldest son invites friends to church all the time you are right the following four things are a myth.
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

God bless all the PK's out there!

In Jesus Name

3EEE

Whole Hearted 10-14-2007 03:59 PM

My kids of course are preachers kids. They are great kids, not prefect but great kids. My son was homeschooled until 12th grade and then went to pubilc school the last year. He was voted senior class vice president and graduated second in his classs. His mother and I got glowing repots about our son form his teacher. The principle told us when he meet our son he said "Oh my God Danail the lions den" But my son brought as high as 7 kids at a time to church from the high school. Is he pefect no, but good kid. Now he is in college and working about 30 to 35 hours a week. Paying his car not and so on. I pay his college and he does the rest. He is our churcfh drumer and has always been active in church

My daugther is a great kid, Made her first CD at 11 years old. Is a praise singer and teaches other ther parts, shes now 13. She goes many places and has meet many peopl and some might think her spoiled, but not true. SHe works for her money, she cleans houses and babysits to get her money.
She's the apple of my eye.

Great kids, not prefect. But then again I don't know of a perfect kid in this church or any other.

Hoovie 10-14-2007 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Whole Hearted (Post 271494)
My kids of course are preachers kids. They are great kids, not prefect but great kids. My son was homeschooled until 12th grade and then went to pubilc school the last year. He was voted senior class vice president and graduated second in his classs. His mother and I got glowing repots about our son form his teacher. The principle told us when he meet our son he said "Oh my God Danail the lions den" But my son brought as high as 7 kids at a time to church from the high school. Is he pefect no, but good kid. Now he is in college and working about 30 to 35 hours a week. Paying his car not and so on. I pay his college and he does the rest. He is our churcfh drumer and has always been active in church

My daugther is a great kid, Made her first CD at 11 years old. Is a praise singer and teaches other ther parts, shes now 13. She goes many places and has meet many peopl and some might think her spoiled, but not true. SHe works for her money, she cleans houses and babysits to get her money.
She's the apple of my eye.

Great kids, not prefect. But then again I don't know of a perfect kid in this church or any other.

Awesome! This is inspiring!

Trouvere 10-14-2007 05:06 PM

amen we have good kids.I am proud of all of them.People have strange ideas when it comes to ministry.There is no cookie cutter for people.Everyone is different.

Raven 10-14-2007 06:29 PM

Great Post Pastor Poster!
I'm a PK, and like Dan and RevBuddy, I'm definitely "marked" by the experience.
I have 3 grown children [some post here] who have become tremendous Christians even though they have had plenty of excuses to be otherwise.
So yes, it is a challenge to be a PK and still turn out "normal" and your 3 statements will go along ways in bringing this about.
Raven

Darcie 10-14-2007 07:56 PM

Being a PK is Tuff Stuff!

Sherri 10-14-2007 09:17 PM

Being a PK is not easy, but they do get lots of blessings that other kids don't get. We always tried to remind our kids how blessed they were for being raised in a pastor's home. We did not EVER talk about church problems in front of them when they were kids; they had no clue that saints could be BAD.

My kids are blessed and highly favored!!! I really don't think they would trade their upbringing with anyone else.

Neck 10-15-2007 12:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster (Post 271217)
You know the stereotypes, right?

The myth that all preachers' kids are,
  • rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
  • circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
  • pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
  • blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.

Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.

The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.

The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.

The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.

The more success your parents have the more you life in a viewing box.

I just thank God for my Parents.

They both were first honest and loved what they were doing.

Though my father died young.

I have experienced many folks over the years who loved them dearly.

I will take that anyday....

Nathan Eckstadt

Rachel 10-15-2007 07:10 AM

Great post, Dan.


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