Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneEyre
There are those who would tell me I am backslidden. I no longer attend church regularly. My last experience in church ended in my trust being violated by preachers. Don't ask for details. I'm not looking for pity or even empathy. I don't want to be viewed as a victim and I'm not wanting to discredit anyone. I would never relate specifics on a forum.
My desire for God and church is not gone. I still believe I have a relationship with God but I am afraid and reluctant to try to begin again with a group of believers.
Do I know Christ? Yes. Do I love Him? Yes. Do I want to serve Him? Yes.
This has continued for months. The only road home is back to Calvary. To look at the sacrifice and know it was personally for me but I can't live at the foot of Calvary. I am told I need to go back to church. Back to where the knives were placed into my back. Will someone please tell me that the wounds will someday heal?
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There are some good support groups out there including spiritualabuse.org if you are interested in that.
I took a few months off church after I left the UPCI. It was a good time for healing to take place with God. After that I found a great church that was spirit filled that didn't condemn or preach you are going to hell over subjective things, but they focused on building you up in the Lord.
There are MANY good churches out there. Sometimes you can get into a good small group that meets at someone's home. These are starting to really sprout up everywhere.
Depending on your situation, it could take a while to heal. What I learned is to never fully put my trust in another man, but only Jesus. Man fails where God never does.
Wish you well.