DISCLAIMER: YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO READ BELOW THIS SENTENCE WITHOUT A SENSE OF HUMOR!
Got my registration packet for GC. Inside is a coupon booklet from the Tampa Convention and Visitor's Bureau. Inside are exciting savings for things such as:
Bernini of Ybor (restaurant): "Free Glass of House Wine with Purchase of Dinner (or Sinner) Entree" All the ugly girls start lookin purty around communion time! :sshhh
Adventure Island (water park): I wonder how many long sleeves and skirts will show up there?
Big City Tavern(restaurant): We all do eat at Applebee's Bar and Grill, right?
Channelside Cinemas 10 and Imax: All the UPC folks will go to the IMAX no doubt.
Dinosaur World: 150 life-sized dinosaurs complete with the entire steering committee of the AMC conference!
Green Iguana Bar and Grill: "Tampa's number one spot for food, music, and fun." (I thought that was the ABI Alumni Breakfast at GC)
Heritage Harbor Golf and Country Club: NONE of our preachers will be golfing during the Holy Convocation!?!?!?!?!?!
M.J. Barleyhoppers (restaurant): "A celebration of beers, ales and spirits from around the world with an international food menu. Experience the world, one beer at a time. Free domestic beer, house wine or dessert with your dinner entree." We could have a fund raiser for our missionaries. They could represent their respective country and whoever eats the dessert from their country of origin wins 50 PIM's!!!
Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino: "Buy one drink, get one of equal or lesser value free in the Lobby Bar". Let's see if we can double our SFC money!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stumps Supper Club, Howl at the Moon, Splitsville, Tinatapas: "Restaurants, Bowling, Billiards and Bars at Channelside. Stumps Supper Club offers Southern cooking and deep fried dancing." I'm not so sure if they really know what "deep fried dancing" is until they see-----
Tampa Sweethearts Cigar Company: $5 off any purchase made over $50 dollars." There'll be enough smoke blown at the business meeting---we won't need no CEEGARS!
FOR THE SAKE OF BEING FAIR---THERE'S LOTS OF GOOD STUFF IN THE COUPON BOOK TO DO.
THE UPC HAS PLACED A STICKER ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE BOOKLET SAYING: "THESE COUPONS WERE DONATED BY THE TAMPA CONVENTION CENTER AND VISITORS BUREAU AND ARE NOT ENDORSED BY THE UPCI"
Which means, "Although the potential to engage in some of these activities would go against our convictions on holiness and worldly amusements, we trust that our constituents will follw the Holy Ghost and only choose activities that are conducive to wholesome Christian recreation and relaxation." (My paraphrase of the disclaimer sticker and the issuing of the book).
The key word: TRUST