Mich... he DOES love you just the way you are... and so do we.
I do have a question though... I can't remember if I asked this before.
With your husband's condition, and not being able to hold down a job due to that condition-- can he not qualify for medical disability?
The simple answer is..."I don't know".
The complicated one is...over my dead body...LOL
I feel pretty strongly about disability being for people who are physically or mentally UNABLE to work. My husband HAS the ability to work, he just needs an employer that would work with him.
He has currently been unemployed since last April, but in that time some good things have happened. He has been working with a vocational social worker through the department of labor. They paid for him to have psychological testing where he was officially diagnosed with ADHD and Asperger's. In addition they gave him vocational testing to check his abilities, and right now he is working at Goodwill doing a 10 day work eval. where they evaluate how he is in a work environment.
Hopefully at the end of all this, he will be able to find lasting employment with an employer that is understanding about his disabilities, and is willing to work with him.
For me getting disability checks is an absolute last resort. Not only because I think there are people who need it so much more, but also because the resentment that I would feel that he got paid to sit around and play his computer games all day would pretty much be the death knell of our marriage.
I understand how you feel about the disability thing... I feel the same way. I was just curious if it were an option.
They have work programs for people that have problems holding regular jobs. They use them in different areas with different employers who are willing to work with them. I know that they do, and you'd probably have to contact a state mental health/disability representative to find out how to apply for those programs if they have one in your area.
I remember one of the people we used to keep for respite care on holidays worked a job putting Christmas cards in boxes. Some of them glued the envelopes that went with the boxes of Christmas cards. They earned a paycheck for doing that-- and worked when they were able to work. If they had "issues" on a day and couldn't make it, they didn't lose the job.
I really thought it was great that they had programs like that.
I have stuff online from 1997, 1998 or so. I wish I could erase it!
I have my private journals which are bad enough. I read them and it's so hard to see that I was tormenting myself for things that now seem so foolish to me.
So being a bit bored this afternoon, and finding no excitement in my usual haunts, I found myself if anything had changed over here in the past 4 months or so. It really hasn't, which I find strange as my life has changed so drastically.
My Mom got diagnosed with a rare form of cancer (of the Bile Duct), and I had a crazy summer of Doctor's appointments, Chemo & Radiation, and piles of paperwork. At the same time I was falling in love and enjoying spending time with my boyfriend.
I decided to go back to school, I went through the application process and got accepted. I continued to care for my Mom and my boyfriend moved in with me.
And then I got the surprise of my life. For my entire adult life (including 12 years with my ex-husband) It was believed that I could not have children. This saddened me when I was younger, but I had come to accept it, and even enjoy some of the "perks" of not having so many responsibilities. So when I suddenly got sick last month, it took almost 2 weeks before I considered the possibility. Even though I bought a test, I still didn't believe it when it came back positive. (I think it was the 3rd one that convinced me)
Next came trying to convince my atheist boyfriend that this was a miracle, which turned out to be somewhat of an exercise in futility. Then came the decision to have a quickie marriage for insurance benefits (mine had zero maternity coverage), which I planned in 3 days, and it turned out quite nice, if I do say so myself.
I was amused when our "secular" courthouse wedding ceremony turned out to be extremely religious with liberal use of both Jesus and scripture. (My husband a bit less so! LOL)
And so suddenly I find myself married again, and with a baby on the way. If you would have told me this a year ago, I would have called you a liar!
Linear Mode
