Apostolic Friends Forum
Tab Menu 1
Go Back   Apostolic Friends Forum > The Fellowship Hall > Marriage Matters
Facebook

Notices

Marriage Matters For discussion of Marital issues


Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #121  
Old 08-29-2017, 08:06 PM
Evang.Benincasa's Avatar
Evang.Benincasa Evang.Benincasa is offline
Unvaxxed Pureblood too


 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 39,122
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
The Quaker wedding was beautiful in its simplicity. And knowing that we were not entangled in the civil marriage system gave us much peace. And we were very much secure in our faith and understanding of being in covenant in God's eyes after the Quaker tradition. However, after Christina's father died and her mother had to work out some legal complications in order to begin receiving a portion of his Social Security, Christina began to have some concern because she won't be able to receive any Social Security from me upon my passing. So, we began tossing around the possibility of going downtown and getting a "civil marriage". During that period we felt like we were in limbo. At times we felt especially blessed to be in a covenant marriage, but at other times we felt that maybe we should consider a civil marriage. And I even proposed a second time to try to cheer her heart, telling her that if she felt the civil marriage was necessary, I'd gladly take her to be my fiancé again. We it was a gushy moment, but that's how that evolved. In the context of our consideration of civil marriage, I called her my fiancé. However, I also never ceased to call her, or consider her, my wife.

Although it is an entirely different tradition, ancient marriage custom is similar in its interchangeable terms. For example, when a couple were betrothed to marry they were said to be espoused or betrothed to one another, or they could also be addressed as husband and wife, even though they were not formally married yet.

So, one can dig up my words to throw stones if they like. I guess I just didn't make a big deal out of it either way.
Bro, the point isn't that you were calling her your finance when you were around her. You were calling her your fiance to US. Think about it, my dear Baron von Munchausen. If you literally believed that your girlfriend was your "covenant WIFE" You sure didn't let the rest of the world know that. No, sorry you are filled to the brim with BALONEY.

Bro, no one should even consider not one syllable from your lips, or finger tips. You are so banged up it isn't even funny anymore.

You could of come clean and explained the truth of the matter.

But, no, as Chris/Aquila style, you chose you defend the indefensible.

You got caught, and you lied a mile long.
__________________
“Burn the Boats!!!” — Hernan Cortes
  #122  
Old 08-29-2017, 08:19 PM
TK Burk's Avatar
TK Burk TK Burk is offline
Lamb Saved & Shepherd Led


 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,729
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
The Quaker wedding was beautiful in its simplicity. And knowing that we were not entangled in the civil marriage system gave us much peace. And we were very much secure in our faith and understanding of being in covenant in God's eyes after the Quaker tradition. However, after Christina's father died and her mother had to work out some legal complications in order to begin receiving a portion of his Social Security, Christina began to have some concern because she won't be able to receive any Social Security from me upon my passing. So, we began tossing around the possibility of going downtown and getting a "civil marriage". During that period we felt like we were in limbo. At times we felt especially blessed to be in a covenant marriage, but at other times we felt that maybe we should consider a civil marriage. And I even proposed a second time to try to cheer her heart, telling her that if she felt the civil marriage was necessary, I'd gladly take her to be my fiancé again. We it was a gushy moment, but that's how that evolved. In the context of our consideration of civil marriage, I called her my fiancé. However, I also never ceased to call her, or consider her, my wife.

Although it is an entirely different tradition, ancient marriage custom is similar in its interchangeable terms. For example, when a couple were betrothed to marry they were said to be espoused or betrothed to one another, or they could also be addressed as husband and wife, even though they were not formally married yet.

So, one can dig up my words to throw stones if they like. I guess I just didn't make a big deal out of it either way.
You didn't actually answer all I asked.

I do have one question: did you and your fiancée ever get your "civil marriage"?
__________________
The Bible is open to those that want Truth, and if they want Truth, they find Truth. They watch individuals squabble over Bible symbolism on the Internet, and leave the Message boards to enter into the real world where live people dwell, and they find Truth. The World Wide Web is full of Internet Ayatollahs who speak their mind. There is only one Truth, and it is not hidden. No matter what anyone says, Truth still converts the sincere.
 -DD Benincasa, 12/06/03

www.tkburk.com
  #123  
Old 08-29-2017, 08:19 PM
Evang.Benincasa's Avatar
Evang.Benincasa Evang.Benincasa is offline
Unvaxxed Pureblood too


 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 39,122
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
And I even proposed a second time to try to cheer her heart, telling her that if she felt the civil marriage was necessary, I'd gladly take her to be my fiancé again.
She needed to be cheered up? I guess she wasn't swallowing you "covenant" hokum.
__________________
“Burn the Boats!!!” — Hernan Cortes
  #124  
Old 08-29-2017, 08:23 PM
TK Burk's Avatar
TK Burk TK Burk is offline
Lamb Saved & Shepherd Led


 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,729
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Yes and no. A common law marriage entered into in Ohio before October 10, l991 constitutes a valid, legal marriage in Ohio. On October 10, l991, Ohio abolished common law marriage. After that date, no new common law marriages can be formed.
Ohio Marriage FAQs | DivorceNet
www.divorcenet.com/states/ohio/ohfaq01
__________________
The Bible is open to those that want Truth, and if they want Truth, they find Truth. They watch individuals squabble over Bible symbolism on the Internet, and leave the Message boards to enter into the real world where live people dwell, and they find Truth. The World Wide Web is full of Internet Ayatollahs who speak their mind. There is only one Truth, and it is not hidden. No matter what anyone says, Truth still converts the sincere.
 -DD Benincasa, 12/06/03

www.tkburk.com
  #125  
Old 08-30-2017, 08:12 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa View Post
You are a hustler. Plain and simple. You had your "Quaker Marriage" and then after a while you start calling her your fiance' again?
EB, you're coloring the water. I didn't just start calling her my fiancé again. We were in the midst of considering a civil marriage based on how she was feeling. You do know that deliberate misrepresentation of this circumstance to suit your desire to slander me is a form of LYING don't you?

Quote:
Chris, the calling her your finance later is the issue. That's the joke, what is even funnier, is that we get to see you fabricate an entire circus act to get around what you got caught in. Bro, you are the sorriest liar I have ever has the misfortune in holding a discussion with.
I've talked about this stuff extensively in several threads.

Is personally attacking me over and over again on a daily basis making you feel better about something none of us are aware of?
  #126  
Old 08-30-2017, 08:16 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa View Post
Bro, the point isn't that you were calling her your finance when you were around her. You were calling her your fiance to US. Think about it, my dear Baron von Munchausen. If you literally believed that your girlfriend was your "covenant WIFE" You sure didn't let the rest of the world know that. No, sorry you are filled to the brim with BALONEY.
I didn't just start calling her my fiancé again out of the blue. We were in the midst of considering a civil marriage based on how she was feeling. You do know that deliberate misrepresentation of this circumstance to suit your desire to slander me is a form of LYING don't you?


Quote:
Bro, no one should even consider not one syllable from your lips, or finger tips. You are so banged up it isn't even funny anymore.
If you thought I was banged up, and you were a true Apostolic Christian, you'd seek to heal, mend, help, and minister to me. You're just a blow hard that continually spews insults and condemnation on anything that moves to make yourself feel better about yourself.

Quote:
You could of come clean and explained the truth of the matter.

But, no, as Chris/Aquila style, you chose you defend the indefensible.

You got caught, and you lied a mile long.
Um, I explained the issue. What gives? You want me to make something up?
  #127  
Old 08-30-2017, 08:23 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TK Burk View Post
You didn't actually answer all I asked.

I do have one question: did you and your fiancée ever get your "civil marriage"?
Not yet. Her mother had a stroke and we've been focused on her care. We're trying to get her into an assisted living facility because of her condition. She's forgetting to pay bills, double paying others, forgetting her meds, and getting hurt in her home. When dealing with the bank we found out that Christina's father is still listed as being on the mortgage and we're in the midst of getting it legally removed.

I've suggested that we elope. She's wanting a second wedding when that time comes.

TK Burk, I want to thank you for being kind and understanding in this discussion, even if you disagree with elements of my choices.
  #128  
Old 08-30-2017, 08:28 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa View Post
She needed to be cheered up? I guess she wasn't swallowing you "covenant" hokum.
Okay, you crossed the line.

I explained that she had lost her father and her mother had a complication with claiming her entitlement to a portion of his Social Security. In the wake of her FATHER'S DEATH she was reflecting upon this and wondered about what would happen to us if we didn't have a civil marriage. She wasn't feeling down over our arrangement. She had a legitimate concern in the wake of losing her father.

And you take this and use it as a weapon to continue slandering me???

Last edited by Aquila; 08-30-2017 at 08:41 AM.
  #129  
Old 08-30-2017, 08:34 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TK Burk View Post
Yes and no. A common law marriage entered into in Ohio before October 10, l991 constitutes a valid, legal marriage in Ohio. On October 10, l991, Ohio abolished common law marriage. After that date, no new common law marriages can be formed.
Ohio Marriage FAQs | DivorceNet
www.divorcenet.com/states/ohio/ohfaq01
I know. Nevertheless, it isn't illegal for Quakers, or any other Christian, to form a union that isn't a civil marriage. If you want your marriage private (an arrangement outside of government definition and control) instead of civil (a union recognized and defined by the government subject to government control), you have to secure your rights privately through wills and powers of attorney.

Let me emphasize that no laws are broken.

Last edited by Aquila; 08-30-2017 at 08:39 AM.
  #130  
Old 08-30-2017, 09:10 AM
Aquila Aquila is offline
Banned


 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Evang.Benincasa,

You've continually stalked me, harassed me, insulted me, slandered me, mocked me, and misrepresented me.

What do you want? Just say it.

Let's end this foolishness and tell me what it will take for you to calm down and actually talk with me rationally? In most forums you'd already be banned for such personal attacks and near menacing behavior. I honestly don't know why the admins here haven't at least asked you to be more civil. I've requested that they do so, but nothing became of it. And that's their prerogative I guess. They can do as they wish.

Look, I'm not an evangelist. Although I thought I was called for a time and became involved with ministry, I'm no longer interested in being a minister of any kind. I'm just an average Joe. And you're also right, I'm a mess. I don't profess to be perfect. In fact, I've spoken freely about many of my imperfections and less than ideal circumstances. Trust me, I could have chosen not to say a word about me or my life. I could have hidden in anonymity and pretended that all was well. But I didn't. All my contradictions, imperfections, sin, fears, concerns, failures, hurt, experiences, wounds, scars, etc... most of me is laid out in the open. In fact, I've put enough out here on this forum about me, I've sealed the coffin on any opportunity to minister ever again. In fact, you've kind of helped me in that. And for that I'm really grateful. But I'm now growing weary with your endless attacks. Why don't we just settle things like rational people? I'm right here.

And let me assure you, I am a joke. I'm not important. I don't have an office or position in any church. And as previously said, I'm a mess. You're the "evangelist". You're the dude in a shirt and tie with a mission. You've been called to some real important stuff. In fact, you've even appointed yourself as my own personal judge and jury. So, let's stop wasting time. What is it....?

What do you want?
What is your goal in all of this non-stop harassment?
What do you want from me?
What is it that you hope all of this will accomplish?

Please drop the insults and just talk to me. What are you needing from me to end this endless war between us?

Are you wanting to somehow get me to renounce my faith? Are you wanting me to pray through and become you find acceptable? Are you wanting me to leave the forum? Are you wanting me feel so emotionally damaged that I jump off of a bridge somewhere? Are you just testing my resolve? Are you just incapable of controlling yourself? Is personally insulting me non-stop just something you simply get enjoyment from? Are you wanting me to change political parties? Are you wanting me to be converted to Preterism?

Once you tell me, I can think things over and determine if what you're wanting is within my ability.

What do you want? What is your goal in all of this?

You have my undivided attention.

Last edited by Aquila; 08-30-2017 at 09:22 AM.
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
What comes after same sex marriage? Sam Political Talk 10 09-17-2012 01:29 AM
Gay Marriage: For or Against? Charnock Fellowship Hall 636 11-19-2010 02:44 PM
How did you propose marriage? Margies3 Fellowship Hall 31 03-06-2009 11:14 AM
Same Sex Marriage Sam Fellowship Hall 0 02-06-2009 05:28 PM
Gay Marriage Dedicated Mind Fellowship Hall 43 11-18-2008 09:14 PM

 
User Infomation
Your Avatar

Latest Threads
- by Salome

Help Support AFF!

Advertisement




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:02 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.