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  #81  
Old 08-24-2017, 08:36 PM
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TK Burk TK Burk is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
I was just being straight forward, I didn't mean to be crude. We're all adults here, and the topic is a mature one. Certainly if we're going to talk about marriage rejuvenation the subject of sex, intimacy, play, and re-igniting that original spark will come up. What are we going to recommend, going to the zoo? I truly didn't mean to offend any virgin ears. lol

The verse you quoted in context reads...
Ephesians 5:11-12 King James Version (KJV)
11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
12 For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret.
This is sad, because it reveals what you were taught concerning sex and marital intimacy. First, this verse isn't about discussing marital intimacy. It is about talking about those things which are done by the wicked in the privacy of darkness. Second, when marital intimacy is mentioned in the Bible, it is mentioned with a mature frankness, and there is nothing unholy, unclean, or dirty about it.
First, you're correct, it is about things done in secret and in darkness. Just like the sexual relationship between a man and a woman is holy if done in marriage, and is unholy if done outside of marriage. But if you take what is done between the two in marriage and talk that around it becomes perverted. It is sad you cannot see that.

Years ago I wrote a several lesson study entitled Holy Homes. I've taught that series in several churches. So, your summary of what I was taught and what I believe on this issue is very wrong. The difference between you and me is that I do not discuss intimate details about my wife and me. Not in a marriage seminar setting, and especially not for all to see on the World Wide Web. I have way too much respect for my wife to place her in a showcase in Amsterdam.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
Proverbs 5:18-19 King James Version (KJV)
18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.
19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
And then there is the Hebrew euphemisms in the Song of Solomon.
Song of Solomon 7:8
I said, I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of the boughs thereof: now also thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine, and the smell of thy nose like apples;
Song of Solomon 2:3
As the apple tree among the trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons. I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste.
Love and physical intimacy between a husband and wife is not crude, lewd, or dirty. It's lovely, precious, sacred, joyous, pure, and blessed. When someone gets all "grossed out" or "shocked" about marital intimacy, you can be relatively certain that they don't have a healthy view of this gift of God.
So now you're Solomon? Song of Solomon is an inspired book, not a tell all sex book. It's one thing to talk about intimacy within a marital relationship. It quite another to tell everyone about sexual conquests. The former is a teaching on intimate principles. The latter is a vulgar sharing of fleshly lusts, which is more than likely shared to excite the teller.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
Titus 1:15
Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.
Ah, "the pure"...now isn't that a novel thing for you to mention here?
__________________
A prophet out for profit is no profit as a prophet at all.

Never trade what the Bible clearly says for something you wish it to say.

"Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them." (Eph 5:11)

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  #82  
Old 08-25-2017, 12:18 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa View Post
http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com...2&postcount=73


You made up my quote? To make it look like I was saying that I'm uptight?

Chris, you are such a liar.





No, most people just get disgusted and leave the thread. Because they see it's just you playing shock the Christians.



Oh, you just figured that out? You mean you just stumble your way through life like a drunken man carrying a ming vase? Chris, your wife, is she cool with you telling everyone on the World Wide Web that she dusts the shelves in the nude? No Apostolic wife would appreciate their husband talking about their PRIVATE life on a forum? A forum? Good points, like the ones on top of your head.




Really?

May I suggest you go there.

Where you and the other "Christians" can talk about your weirdness. Locked down Marriage forum? Right on bro!

You know, this place isn't helping you. You are either one of the biggest fakers, or you are literally coming apart at the seams. Bro, you need to find a place to meet Jesus Christ. You need to be filled to overflowing with the Holy Ghost. Bro, your solutions aren't solutions, they are just deeper into the pit.



With you? You think anyone in their right mind would give you access to a locked private room on their forum? To discuss your weird inclinations.

Insults? No, they are observations of your great zeal to be over the top on a Christain forum.
Hey, I can understand if you felt some posts were over the top. I get that. And in retrospect, maybe they were. But you're really going way out there with it. Again, to the point of being very personal in your attacks. Can't you address an issue without trying to personally tear the person you disagree with apart?
  #83  
Old 08-25-2017, 12:24 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Esaias View Post
What could you possibly want to discuss, on an internet forum, that "under 18 not allowed" would even remotely appeal to you?

GOOD GRIEF, you need to go.
Well, I could perform some searches on this forum regarding questions relating to the marriage bed, and I'm certain you'll see many threads started (not even from me) on questions regarding "m", "os", etc.

You guys are going to run with it like that's what I'm wanting. No, I'm seeing that there are a number of rather mature subjects discussed from polygamy to other things. I think you guys have a good point. Perhaps restricting the marriage thread to those profiles registered as being 18 or older would not only protect those who are under age, but offer a degree of freedom for those with perhaps more serious questions that are of an intimate nature.

It's not a "bad" idea. IF... you're really that concerned.
  #84  
Old 08-25-2017, 12:27 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa View Post
What kind of "Christian" forum has an Adult Section?

I think Aquila done bumped his head.
Several. It's my understanding that should your profile be registered with a birth date that makes you under 18 years of age you can't even see the marriage section. It allows adults to discuss various marital issues without the prying eyes of minors. It's really a common sense approach. Protects minors from being exposed to more mature topics and it allows married adults to freely discuss issues, questions, etc. without being worried that some minor might read their posts.
  #85  
Old 08-25-2017, 01:01 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TK Burk View Post
First, you're correct, it is about things done in secret and in darkness. Just like the sexual relationship between a man and a woman is holy if done in marriage, and is unholy if done outside of marriage. But if you take what is done between the two in marriage and talk that around it becomes perverted. It is sad you cannot see that.
For the most part I agree with you. However, what was said here by myself and others was posted in a section of the forum that titled, "Marriage Matters For discussion of Marital issues". I didn't post anything intimate in "The Fellowship Hall". If you guys are so worried about the subject matter, why have a "Marriage Matters For discussion of Marital issues" section of the forum? Is it only to discuss what nights we play Scrabble, Bridge, and Monopoly? What television shows we have to suffer through that our spouses like? Or maybe it is to discuss our chores list? Marital issues by nature can be mature topics. It could include subjects like arguing, fights, a spouse's hidden drinking problem, sex, sexual dysfunctions, questions relating to frequency, impotence, recovering from affairs, etc. Other Christian forums have marriage sections that are on fire with questions, people seeking help, suggestions, advice, about all kinds of things. In a way, this forum's marriage section is DEAD. It's rarely posted to at all. Why are other Christians on other Christian forums so willing to be open books and tackle the mature topics... but Apostolics get squeamish about the whole thing? Y'all need to lighten up, open up, get real, make it plain, don't be so afraid of what someone else might say or think, and have reasonable measures to keep minors out of the topic. Even Facebook has an age requirement. Or... why even have a Marriage Section? Oh, it's the bridge night thing. No problem. Now back to our regularly scheduled program of Mayberry. I think you know what I'm saying.

Quote:
Years ago I wrote a several lesson study entitled Holy Homes. I've taught that series in several churches.
That sounds very powerful. I'd like to be in one of your classes sometime if you're ever in South Western Ohio.

Quote:
So, your summary of what I was taught and what I believe on this issue is very wrong. The difference between you and me is that I do not discuss intimate details about my wife and me. Not in a marriage seminar setting, and especially not for all to see on the World Wide Web. I have way too much respect for my wife to place her in a showcase in Amsterdam.
I can respect that. And I also think that we're actually not so far apart on this issue as you might think. Please. Take a step back with me and try to see what I'm trying to say in the next few things I write to you. Try to refrain from judging and just try to understand what I'm trying to say. What if someone else doesn't entirely share your approach to the issue? For example, I'm relatively anonymous. Few, if anyone here, knows my real name or my last name. That allows me some degree of freedom to be more frank. Now, I assure you, I wouldn't share those kinds of things in a seminar or anything attached to my real name on the world wide web either. I posted those things in a Marriage Rejuvenation thread. I didn't post them in The Fellowship Hall. The question was asked, "Any great ideas from anyone on how us married folks can keep the home fires burning?" Okay, that can go almost anywhere if people post with frankness and honesty. I'm thinking about those couples whose "home fires" (their passion) is dead. Their marriage bed cold. The intimacy gone. I didn't mean any harm by sharing a few intimate ideas based on our private lives. I meant to offer some ideas to heat things up for couples who might be trapped under ice. That was my intention.

Quote:
So now you're Solomon? Song of Solomon is an inspired book, not a tell all sex book. It's one thing to talk about intimacy within a marital relationship. It quite another to tell everyone about sexual conquests. The former is a teaching on intimate principles. The latter is a vulgar sharing of fleshly lusts, which is more than likely shared to excite the teller.
You know that rabbinical schools typically didn't allow students to read the Song of Songs unless their students were married or over 30 years of age. My point was that while yes, there are spiritual types and shadows throughout the SoS, they are depicted in ways that would shock the modern reader if they were written in our lingo. And in the context, it's not impure or unholy just because it's brazenly erotic.

Quote:
Ah, "the pure"...now isn't that a novel thing for you to mention here?
Please notice that I didn't attack you personally anywhere in my post above. I only shared my thoughts with you openly and honestly. What gives man?

Last edited by Aquila; 08-25-2017 at 01:12 PM.
  #86  
Old 08-25-2017, 01:18 PM
n david n david is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amanah View Post
I still don't think it's a good idea to discuss intimate details of our relationships on a Forum, even in a restricted area
Absolutely!

There are things a gentleman should not discuss, namely physical intimacy with his wife.

This isn't a locker room. Nor is it a frat house or wherever else worldly men gather to boast of their conquests and sexual prowess.

I know a Pastor and wife (UPC) who would conduct an annual young adult / married couples "bible study" series. It was done during the weeknight bible study and usually during the summer, when attendance was lower due to vacations, etc. I heard about it before attending it. I was shocked at what was discussed, even with it being divided with men in one area and women in another. I'm not exaggerating when I say much of what was discussed was pornographic in detail. It's no wonder that church has had several affairs over the years!

Call me a prude, but I don't believe men should be discussing sex with other men (nor women with other women). I don't want to know what turns another man's wife on. I don't want to know his exploits, what he does or how/where he's done it. And I'm sure not going to talk about mine. I don't even share that information with my best friend, and he knows pretty much everything about me.
  #87  
Old 08-25-2017, 01:38 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by n david View Post
Absolutely!

There are things a gentleman should not discuss, namely physical intimacy with his wife.

This isn't a locker room. Nor is it a frat house or wherever else worldly men gather to boast of their conquests and sexual prowess.

I know a Pastor and wife (UPC) who would conduct an annual young adult / married couples "bible study" series. It was done during the weeknight bible study and usually during the summer, when attendance was lower due to vacations, etc. I heard about it before attending it. I was shocked at what was discussed, even with it being divided with men in one area and women in another. I'm not exaggerating when I say much of what was discussed was pornographic in detail. It's no wonder that church has had several affairs over the years!

Call me a prude, but I don't believe men should be discussing sex with other men (nor women with other women). I don't want to know what turns another man's wife on. I don't want to know his exploits, what he does or how/where he's done it. And I'm sure not going to talk about mine. I don't even share that information with my best friend, and he knows pretty much everything about me.
There you have it folks. Ndavid has spoken and we all must agree and abide by his convictions, opinions, and conclusions. And no one is permitted to disagree with or have a different approach, else they be slandered as perverts and such. In fact, if you agree with Ndavid, your church will experience fewer affairs, as he clearly implies. Let's all just do things exactly as Ndavid would. There can be no freedom of thought, expression, or opinion unless it agrees with Ndavid's.

All hail Ndavid! LOL

Last edited by Aquila; 08-25-2017 at 01:43 PM.
  #88  
Old 08-25-2017, 01:50 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

What I find most interesting is that the people that make these things so "in your face" are those who go off ranting and raving against them.

For example, back in the 90's a man in church pointed out that he had to explain to his kids what "os" was because of various details about what happened between Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky being in the news.

I asked, "Bill and Monica tried to keep what happened a secret. Who made those details front page news?"

Most of this would have been in a dead and buried thread and if those who say they oppose it didn't stir it up for further discussion.

Last edited by Aquila; 08-25-2017 at 01:57 PM.
  #89  
Old 08-25-2017, 01:51 PM
n david n david is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aquila View Post
There you have it folks. Ndavid has spoken and we all must agree and abide by his convictions, opinions, and conclusions. And no one is permitted to disagree with or have a different approach, else they be slandered as perverts and such. In fact, if you agree with Ndavid, your church will experience fewer affairs, as he clearly implies. Let's all just do things exactly as Ndavid would. There can be no freedom of thought, expression, or opinion unless it agrees with Ndavid's.

All hail Ndavid! LOL
  #90  
Old 08-25-2017, 02:07 PM
Aquila Aquila is offline
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Re: Marriage Rejuvenation?

Quote:
Originally Posted by n david View Post
So, can we peacefully and logically disagree without you trying to paint me as a depraved pervert? Are you willing to see that although I have a more open approach, my intentions are not diabolical? Can you acknowledge that I was only trying to break the ice and maybe give some ideas to couples who are struggling with lack of passion in their marriages? I'm not the monster you depict me as being.

Last edited by Aquila; 08-25-2017 at 02:09 PM.
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