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  #21  
Old 11-21-2007, 11:10 AM
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IAintMovin IAintMovin is offline
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OK read the first page and saw that there are many or at least a few who think that it may be wrong for a son or son in law to follow a father or FIL.

Let me try to weigh in on the other side of the coin. In many cases of a church that has grown that son or SIL has been there through the process and understands what makes the church run and why elements are put in place and why certain things are done. They literally become part of the fabric of that church. Many times, not every time, when someone is brought in that has not been there it brings distruction. There are times that distruction comes from turning it over to a family member too.

My point is simply this, If God is in the process, then there is nothing wrong with a son or SIL talking over at the right time, and naturally if God is not in it, then it will fail.

I really dont think that there is a rock solid - this is the way it should be done every time - answer for this question. Each one comes around and has to be delt with on an individual basis.

Personally if God allows it to happen, I would be honored beyond measure if one of my sons were called to preach and pastor and then fill my shoes, or the same can be said of the one SIL that God has blessed us with that is a minister or if one of my other two daughters marry a minister who can fill the job, but again IT HAS TO BE A GOD THING.

And yes there have been times that some didnt listen to Him........but there have been many where people did.........
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  #22  
Old 11-21-2007, 11:29 AM
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Suffice it to say, it happens too often.

BTW, I think I may know the city on the original post, and yes this does happen.
I'm not against women preachers, but pastors wives and daughters shouldn't have any "power". Isn't the "man" the head? Isn't that the whole big deal on I Cor 11? What happened to Biblical authority?
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  #23  
Old 11-21-2007, 11:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SecretWarrior View Post
I see many churches where the Children of the Pastor have now grown and many have stayed home to become Asst. Pastors/Assoc. Pastors and Women's Pastors/ Church Secretary/ and then their children become leaders and there is not much room for others...

and the Family Name becomes iconic symbol of the Church...

Is this wrong?

There is a church I have friend who attends there and the Pastor's Married Daughter literally runs the Church. It is rather large but it is known that her word is like coming from the Mouth of the Pastor and to say something against her or have a different idea is something that is not much appreciated or accepted...

and her husband a evangelist is out preaching 3/4 of the month....

now there may nothing wrong in this... or with this...but is the Family who Leads the Church becoming to powerful in the Church?

Many Churches that have been run by the "family" seems to be losing many members that have been there for years... IS this an isolated incident or do people actually after awhile tire of this happening?
There is a pattern to what you describe. However, I've seen it work the other way too, where someone with family connections is deliberately passed over just for appearances sake.

The "Pastor's Married Daughter" you mention is probably an energetic extension of her older parents, and the parents have probably just gotten into the habit of delegating to her because she gets things done that they just don't have the time or energy to get to.

There's a lot of complexity to this. But I've seen cases like you describe where it all went wrong and because of the insistence upon keeping things in the family the church dies.
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  #24  
Old 11-21-2007, 12:02 PM
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I am - you had to key to the whole issue of Family Business. It has to be a God thing- I have no problem with God placing a man ,whose ever family he is from ,as my minister. I do think there have been occasions- and I see an alarming trend in UPC- that sons, or son in laws were called to the ministry by the family or it was the occupation they knew to go into. This type of situation so often ends up in tragedy for the minister's family and the saints.
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  #25  
Old 11-21-2007, 03:37 PM
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Ya Think...

Quote:
Originally Posted by SecretWarrior View Post
I see many churches where the Children of the Pastor have now grown and many have stayed home to become Asst. Pastors/Assoc. Pastors and Women's Pastors/ Church Secretary/ and then their children become leaders and there is not much room for others...

and the Family Name becomes iconic symbol of the Church...

Is this wrong?

There is a church I have friend who attends there and the Pastor's Married Daughter literally runs the Church. It is rather large but it is known that her word is like coming from the Mouth of the Pastor and to say something against her or have a different idea is something that is not much appreciated or accepted...

and her husband a evangelist is out preaching 3/4 of the month....

now there may nothing wrong in this... or with this...but is the Family who Leads the Church becoming to powerful in the Church?

Many Churches that have been run by the "family" seems to be losing many members that have been there for years... IS this an isolated incident or do people actually after awhile tire of this happening?

My experience: I married the daughter of a pastor of an Apostolic church. I became the Associate pastor, serving for close to 20 years. My In-laws were elderly and I began doing the role of pastor. I married, buried, counseled, preached with the consent of my In-laws. But...my sister-in-law had a son that she wanted to have the church. She kept telling her mama and daddy that her son was in direct line to have the church. Mind you, I married the pastor's daughter, her sister! But that wasn't good enough. Soon, my wife and I were forced to leave, it became that bad. So...to answer the question, YES, in my observation, churches are seriously guilty of nepotism, to the nth degree!
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  #26  
Old 11-21-2007, 05:42 PM
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pelathais pelathais is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anapko View Post
My experience: I married the daughter of a pastor of an Apostolic church. I became the Associate pastor, serving for close to 20 years. My In-laws were elderly and I began doing the role of pastor. I married, buried, counseled, preached with the consent of my In-laws. But...my sister-in-law had a son that she wanted to have the church. She kept telling her mama and daddy that her son was in direct line to have the church. Mind you, I married the pastor's daughter, her sister! But that wasn't good enough. Soon, my wife and I were forced to leave, it became that bad. So...to answer the question, YES, in my observation, churches are seriously guilty of nepotism, to the nth degree!
I saw a similar situation once, family on family. The one that takes the cake for me was when the "heir" a son-in-law committed adultery and fell from the ministry. Since he wasn't going to inherit the family business- he and his wife decided that no one would. And no one did. Church was handed over to some out of state folks and the family dispersed.
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  #27  
Old 11-21-2007, 08:27 PM
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Addittionally "nepos" tend to protect "nepos to be "

I have seen sons who were handed a church go out of their way to
assure another son of a pastor would get a church, and lets be honest someone in a distroict with clout can sway many appointments.

It is sickening to say the least and I thought pyramid schemes were illegal.
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  #28  
Old 02-14-2008, 11:44 AM
NW Pastor NW Pastor is offline
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Re: Has "Church" become a "Family Business"??

In scripture who, exactly, inherited a spiritual post from a parent? Other than the Levitical priesthood, which was fulfilled and done away with in Christ, what great son's followed great fathers? Moses' or Samuel's maybe?

We are not lords over God's heritage. The church is not our "family business". It is God's business. So many times the church passes to the children as a means of the patriarch to maintain control of or access to the finances of the church. Also, if the church goes to a non-family member, it is awkward for the oldtimers to stay around in the church they have been in for decades. So, this is a tough issue.

Having said that, the church is often remiss in its duty to support a pastor that gave 30 or 40 years of labor and life to the building of the kingdom. It's too bad we have come to this, though.

I guess all those "non-family member" preachers will have to go build their own churches. That, I suppose, is not such a bad consequence.
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  #29  
Old 02-14-2008, 12:00 PM
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Re: Has "Church" become a "Family Business"??

Quote:
Originally Posted by IAintMovin View Post
OK read the first page and saw that there are many or at least a few who think that it may be wrong for a son or son in law to follow a father or FIL.

Let me try to weigh in on the other side of the coin. In many cases of a church that has grown that son or SIL has been there through the process and understands what makes the church run and why elements are put in place and why certain things are done. They literally become part of the fabric of that church. Many times, not every time, when someone is brought in that has not been there it brings distruction. There are times that distruction comes from turning it over to a family member too.

My point is simply this, If God is in the process, then there is nothing wrong with a son or SIL talking over at the right time, and naturally if God is not in it, then it will fail.

I really dont think that there is a rock solid - this is the way it should be done every time - answer for this question. Each one comes around and has to be delt with on an individual basis.

Personally if God allows it to happen, I would be honored beyond measure if one of my sons were called to preach and pastor and then fill my shoes, or the same can be said of the one SIL that God has blessed us with that is a minister or if one of my other two daughters marry a minister who can fill the job, but again IT HAS TO BE A GOD THING.

And yes there have been times that some didnt listen to Him........but there have been many where people did.........
AMEN! May be a little partial here but I love your family, and your preaching. And I believe God called you and your Dad.
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He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV

Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
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  #30  
Old 02-14-2008, 12:19 PM
sallyjo76
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Re: Has "Church" become a "Family Business"??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Truthseeker View Post
Amen, might shock some, but pastor wife is not a position in the church.
That's right it's not a calling. She should be respected because she is a saint of God, a sister in the Church and a Pastors wife.
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