From the Inbox

[Tina]

I found this today while looking for something else-- and decided to put it here too since the thread in the fellowship hall will probably be viewed by very few and quickly get lost. I might need to find this again later.

~~~~~~~~



A LIFE THAT MATTERS

Ready or not
Someday it will all come to an end.

There will be no more sunrises,
no minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected,
whether treasured or forgotten,
will pass to someone else.

Your wealth,
fame and temporal power
will shrivel to irrelevance

It will not matter what you owned
or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments, frustrations
and jealousies will finally disappear.

So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans
and to-do lists will expire.

The wins and losses
that once seemed so important
will fade away.

It won't matter where you came from
or on what side of the tracks you lived
at the end.

It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.

Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter?

How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought,
but what you built;
not what you got,
but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success,
but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned,
but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity,
compassion, courage or sacrifice that enriched,
empowered or encouraged others
to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence,
but your character.

What will matter is not how many people youknew,
but how many will feel a lasting loss when you are gone.

What will matter is not your memories,
but the memories that live in those you loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered,
by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn't happen by chance.
It's not a matter of circumstance, but of choice.

Choose to live a life that matters.

~Michael Josephson

[Rhoni]

Subject: brain

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.
Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
"I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.
It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope.

Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.."
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great
length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a
female brain."
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye
contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone
wanted to ask,

"Why is the male brain so much more?"
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire
group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the
price of the female brains, because they've actually been used."

SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH

[Theresa]

To My Daughter or Son
>
>
>
> *Just for this morning, I am going to step
> over the laundry, and pick you up and take you to
> the park to play.
>
> *Just for this morning, I will leave the
>dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put
>that puzzle of yours together.
>
> *Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the
>telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with
>you in the backyard and blow bubbles.
>
> *Just for this afternoon, I will not yell
>once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and
>whine for the ice cream truck and I will buy you one
>if he comes by.
>
> *Just for this afternoon, I won't worry about
>what you are going to be when you grow up, or second
>guess every decision I have made where you are
>concerned.
>
> *Just for this afternoon, I will let you help
>me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you trying
>to fix them.
>
> *Just for this afternoon, I will take us to
>McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can
>have both toys.
>
> *Just for this evening, I will hold you in my
>arms and tell you a story about how you were born
>and how much I love you.
>
> *Just for this evening, I will let you splash
>in the tub and not get angry.
>
> *Just for this evening, I will let you stay up
>late while we sit on the porch and count all the
>stars.
>
> *Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside
>you for hours, and miss my favorite TV shows.
>
> *Just for this evening when I run my finger
>through your hair as you pray, I will simply be
>grateful that God has given me the greatest gift
>ever given.
>
> *I will think about the mothers and fathers
>who are searching for their missing children, the
>mothers and fathers who are visiting their
>children's graves instead of their bedrooms, and
>mothers and fathers who are in hospital rooms
>watching their children suffer senselessly, and
>screaming inside that they can't handle it anymore.
>
> *And when I kiss you good night I will hold
>you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then,
> ;that I will thank God for you, and ask Him for
>nothing, except one more day.............

[tamor]

Wet Pants!

Come with me to a third grade classroom...

There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, "Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat."

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered. As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap. The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!" Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out.

All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. “You've done enough, you klutz!" Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, "You did that on purpose, didn't you?" Susie whispers back, "I wet my pants once too."


*May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us to do good.

[Digging4Truth]

From a strictly Mathematical Viewpoint:


What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been in situations where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 101%? What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 1 9 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

AND, look how far the love of God will take you:



L- O- V- E-O-F-G-O-D

12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

[Falla39]

Gods Grace

I did not know His love before,
the way I know it now.
I could not see my need for Him,
my pride would not allow.
I had it all, without a care,
the "self-sufficient" lie.
My path was smooth, my sea was still,
not a cloud was in my sky.
I thought I knew His love for me,
I thought I'd seen His grace,
I thought I did not need to grow,
I thought I'd found my place.
But then the way grew rough and dark,
the storm clouds quickly rolled;
The waves began to rock my ship,
I found I had no hold.
The ship that I had built myself
was made of foolish pride.
It fell apart and left me bare,
with nowhere else to hide
I had no strength or faith to face
the trials that lay ahead,
And so I simply spoke His name
and bowed my weary head.
His loving arms enveloped me,
and then He helped me stand.
He said, "You still must face this storm,
but I will hold your hand."
So through the dark and lonely night
He guided me through pain.
I could not see the light of day
or when I'd smile again.
Yet through the pain and endless tears,
my faith began to grow.
I could not see it at the time,
but my light began to glow.
I saw God's love in a brand new light,
His grace and mercy, too.
For only when all self was gone
could Jesus' love shine through.
It was not easy in the storm,
I sometimes wondered why.
At times I thought,"I can't go on."
I'd hurt, and doubt, and cry.
But God never left my side
He guided me each day.
Through pain and strife,
through fire and flood,
He helped me all the way.
And now I see as never before
how great His love can be
How in my weakness He is strong,
how God cares for me!
He worked it all out for my good,
although the way was rough.
He only sent what I could bear,
and then He said,"Enough!"
He raised His hand and said, "Be still!"
He made the storm clouds cease.
He opened up the gates of joy
and flooded me with peace.
I saw His face now clearer still,
I felt His presence strong,
I found anew His faithfulness,
He never did me wrong.
And now I know more storms will come,
but only for my good,
For pain and tears have helped me grow
as nothing ever could.
I still have so much
more to learn
as God works in me;
If in the storm I'll love Him more,
that's where I want to be!

Author Unknown

[Rhoni]

You know you're Pentecostal when....

1): The amount of money you spend on hairspray exceeds your gas bill.
2): Your pastor announces midweek services EVERY Sunday night, and
Sunday service[s] EVERY Wednesday night.
3): You [or the ladies you know] can swim in a denim skirt and still
have fun.
4): It takes longer to TAKE prayer requests than it does to pray for
them.
5): You run into more than half of the church members on one trip to Wal-Mart.
6): The musicians at your church can tear it up, but non of them can
read sheet music.
7): You have 50 pairs of church shoes.
: You're adept at stopping runs in stockings with just about anything.
9): You're considered an old maid if you're not married by age 18.
10): Running the aisles and jumping up and down is your exercise.
11): You could be an Olympic kickball player with all the practice
from church functions.
12): A birthday party is a night on the town.
13): Your white choir moves like Kirk Franklin's group.
14): The pastor says, "With this thought I close," more than three
times each service.
15): You have adequate respect for the power of flying hairpins.
16): Your feet have been stomped on at least 3 times during a service.
17): A run in your last pair of stockings is a national disaster.
1: You judge a church service by swollen eyes, rumpled clothes, and
disheveled hair.
19): Your kids know how to eat any crunchy thing quietly and could sleep on a hard bench through a tornado.
20): When shopping for shirts, you always run it through the "Praise
the Lord," test.
21): Sunday and Wednesday mean no cooking or dishes.
22): You can maneuver into a vehicle without messing up your hairdo.
23): Celebrating your 21st birthday doesn't mean much.
24): The employees at Wnedys and BYB know you by name.
25): You can always find hairpins on the floor after a good service.
26): You can pronounce, "Habakkuk".
27): Mondays and Thursdays are the hardest days to wake up in the
morning.
2: Your day of rest includes 2 church services, choir practice, and
Golden Corral.
29): The kids you know think shot glasses are for playing communion.
30): Growing up you baptize your cousins and siblings several times in
the swimming pool.
31): Your 2 year-old runs through Wal-Mart shouting, "Praise the Lord!
Eb shamma dabba yamma yabba dooba! *clap *clap* clap* Yes, Lord! Yes,
Lord! Thank You Jesus! Hallelujah!"
32): The only thing longer than your prayer list is the hair of the
ladies you know.

[tamor]

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them.

He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.

Helloooo, just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year, namely, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!

Helloooo .... It's been a year! - I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up.... He never called back. Guess I won that stupid argument. I bet he feels like an idiot.

[berkeley]

Originally Posted by tamor

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them.

He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.

Helloooo, just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year, namely, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!

Helloooo .... It's been a year! - I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up.... He never called back. Guess I won that stupid argument. I bet he feels like an idiot.

[Tina]

To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
who has given birth to
A premature baby.

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.

You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.