Gabby's

[MrsMcD]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Just a slip...I have paid all my ex's taxes and bills for years...we do not have a good relationship...it is conflictual and disheartening...13 years of pure hell....Just like a marriage...there are two people who have to decide to get along and work the marriage...divorce is just as bad...it takes two. I was awful for 12 years but this 13th year is about to kill me...I wish I'd die or he would.

I'm sorry to hear this. You are too beautiful and sweet to have to continue going through misery. I'll be praying for you. Hang in there.

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by MrsMcD

I'm sorry to hear this. You are too beautiful and sweet to have to continue going through misery. I'll be praying for you. Hang in there.

Mrs. McD;

Thank-you for the compliment but I sure don't feel pretty or sweet.
I feel lonely, abandoned, and mistreated.

I'm wallowing in self pity until March 18th. I don't know what to do for myself...I can counsel others but not very good about handling my own issues.

Thank-you for praying for me.
Blessings, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Sister Truth Seeker

Sister Rhoni I can not understand what is happening with you and your son and the pain it must be causing you....


Have you been close to your son in the past? I can understand the pain....but I also know that if you want to have a relationship with your son and his bride to be, your going to have to put up with this terrible and immature behavior...I would say if your paying you decide who can or can not come to the dinner!!!!! How can he hurt his family I wonder!!! Sis I am so sorry....this has been such an ungoing stressful time...I am praying for you

He told me that his fiance's family can't come [all 100 live there] so it wouldn't be fair to her...the whole wedding is about her and her 8 bridesmaids are all her cousins...so a majority of family will be at the rehearsal dinner. Chad kept saying, "I am telling you it is my wedding and I don't want them to come[my family]."

I am not married, don't have a spouse to bring and I am not sitting there with his family and paying for their meal...it isn't fair.

I should have stuck to my first opinion not to go.

We're only talking my three sisters and my Mother.

[Ron]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Just a slip...I have paid all my ex's taxes and bills for years...we do not have a good relationship...it is conflictual and disheartening...13 years of pure hell....Just like a marriage...there are two people who have to decide to get along and work the marriage...divorce is just as bad...it takes two. I was awful for 12 years but this 13th year is about to kill me...I wish I'd die or he would.

Good Afternoon Ladies. Been a busy day at work for a change.

Rhoni, I am sorry to hear of the hurt and pain you are going through. In what is supposed to be a happy moment, you are experiencing grief.
Nothing pretty much can hurt like the hurt that comes from family.

I will help by remembering you and this situation in prayer.
You need to Forgive! It isn't an option in God's economy.
Release it to him and he can begin to work it out.

Remember, prayer can and does change things!

God Bless!

Ron

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Ron

Good Afternoon Ladies. Been a busy day at work for a change.

Rhoni, I am sorry to hear of the hurt and pain you are going through. In what is supposed to be a happy moment, you are experiencing grief.
Nothing pretty much can hurt like the hurt that comes from family.

I will help by remembering you and this situation in prayer.
You need to Forgive! It isn't an option in God's economy.
Release it to him and he can begin to work it out.

Remember, prayer can and does change things!

God Bless!

Ron

You using my own words to preach to me! Easier to preach isn't it...than to do it! LOL. My options when I am hurt is to cry and isolate or get mad and attack...Getting mad is easier than the hurt I am feeling right now.

I welcome your prayers, Rhoni

[Ron]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

You using my own words to preach to me! Easier to preach isn't it...than to do it! LOL. My options when I am hurt is to cry and isolate or get mad and attack...Getting mad is easier than the hurt I am feeling right now.

I welcome your prayers, Rhoni

That is the truth. It is easier to preach than to live it.
Also when one (no matter who) is hurt you either withdraw, or fight, neither of which we can do if we are to see the hand of God work out situations on our behalf.

That isn't to say we can't be a sounding board for your frustrations, but in the end, it is when we release it (a lot harder to do than say I know) to God-
he then can take control of the situation and work it out for his Glory.
Until then, he will remain the ultimate gentlemen and allow us to struggle with it until we let it go, and let him work.

While my situation isn't the exact same as yours, I am speaking from experience.

Praying!

[Falla39]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

He told me that his fiance's family can't come [all 100 live there] so it wouldn't be fair to her...the whole wedding is about her and her 8 bridesmaids are all her cousins...so a majority of family will be at the rehearsal dinner. Chad kept saying, "I am telling you it is my wedding and I don't want them to come[my family]."

I am not married, don't have a spouse to bring and I am not sitting there with his family and paying for their meal...it isn't fair.

I should have stuck to my first opinion not to go.

We're only talking my three sisters and my Mother.

Sis. Rhoni,

I am beginning to get the idea that your son is a spoiled brat! It

doesn't sound like it is just his dad!! To say it's his wedding and he

doesn't want your small family is a disgrace. And with you paying

for half of it. And this thing of you paying for his dad's taxes. etc,,

Sweet Little Sister, are you enabling this abuse (of you) to continue!!

It appears to me you are the financial vein but I believe you are ,by

the things you continue to do, allowing the thing you despise!! They

simply do not respect you, dear friend!! Plain and simple!! They do not

respect you for some reason. Does your son expect you to enjoy what

is being dished out to you. But at the same time, feel confident you will

come through in the end!!!

I am sorry but this is not right!! And sweet Rhoni, you are not right by

allowing it! Only you must decide (with God's help) what you SHOULD DO!!

I pray God will give you the wisdom to do what He would have you do and

give you the strength to go through with it, in Jesus Name!! Love you, Sister!!

Blessings,

Falla39

[whollyHis]

Well, SIs...here's what I would do, but of course, I am a confrontationalist...LOL (pastor's words) So...you may not want to take this advice....LOL

You and your siblings and your mom, go to the dinner, but SIT elsewhere. Enjoy the food and each other, and forget about the lame excuses for ministry that dare let their ex wife pay their bills while they profess to be a man of God...

HOLD YOUR HEAD UP! YOU CAN SHINE...it may be Chad's wedding- but, it's YOUR money paying ...

Or...you could refuse to pay ANY of it...and not worry about it at all!!!!!

I am praying for you...

Wish I knew a tall, long drink of cool water that would accompany you that day...hmmm... let me think a while on THAT.

[myhaloisintheshop]

Originally Posted by whollyHis

Well, SIs...here's what I would do, but of course, I am a confrontationalist...LOL (pastor's words) So...you may not want to take this advice....LOL

You and your siblings and your mom, go to the dinner, but SIT elsewhere. Enjoy the food and each other, and forget about the lame excuses for ministry that dare let their ex wife pay their bills while they profess to be a man of God...

HOLD YOUR HEAD UP! YOU CAN SHINE...it may be Chad's wedding- but, it's YOUR money paying ...

Or...you could refuse to pay ANY of it...and not worry about it at all!!!!!

I am praying for you...

Wish I knew a tall, long drink of cool water that would accompany you that day...hmmm... let me think a while on THAT.

honestly I think that is great advice. Especially the last part....

[Margies3]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Just a slip...I have paid all my ex's taxes and bills for years...we do not have a good relationship...it is conflictual and disheartening...13 years of pure hell....Just like a marriage...there are two people who have to decide to get along and work the marriage...divorce is just as bad...it takes two. I was awful for 12 years but this 13th year is about to kill me...I wish I'd die or he would.

Just curious, Rhoni............ why are you paying your ex's taxes and bills?? I'd say break that connection!! Make the man stand on his own two feet!

And I hate to say it, but as far your son telling his dad that you would be paying for half of the rehearsal dinner --- was that with your ok ahead of time? If not, I'd say, let that boy learn to stand on HIS own two feet also.

Boy, don't you just want to sit the soon-to-be-new-dau-in-law down and say to her, "take a good long, hard look at my sons father. Then look at how he's treating his mother. Then think hard, darlin!"

I hate to sound all down on your son, but he's really taking advantage!! Not fair!!