View Full Version : Why it is so hard to be a leader
Sister Alvear
10-19-2008, 01:41 PM
Thought this would be a thread that leaders could express their feelings and maybe what has helped us carry on from day to day...
Thoughts????
Well, my husband and I stepped down from our church leadershop positions, but I think what is hard is taking false accusations and just bearing it while still trying to minister to some of the people who are doing it.
Sister Alvear
10-19-2008, 02:25 PM
That is very hard...but a part of leadership...Yeah, I know it hurts...
Timmy
10-19-2008, 03:48 PM
For me, it's simple: nobody wants to follow! :woot
Cindy
10-19-2008, 04:35 PM
For me, it's simple: nobody wants to follow! :woot
I find that hard to believe Tim-may, you are a natural born something.........:D Oh yeah, leader. :tease
Timmy
10-19-2008, 04:48 PM
I find that hard to believe Tim-may, you are a natural born something.........:D Oh yeah, leader. :tease
:whistle
Sister Alvear
10-19-2008, 04:51 PM
Timmy, Paul wrote about you! You must carry his message...
meBNme
10-19-2008, 05:45 PM
because you don't have anyone to follow!
Because the leader always gets smacked in the face with the spider webs first while everyone else watches and laughs as they do the heebie jeebies dance.
Because while no one else is willing to lead, they all want to tell the leader how to lead.
Because its not just you who might fall into the trap, its also everyone who is following.
Because there is always someone breathing down your neck.
The leader doesnt always know just how deep that hole is, or cold that water is, or hard the climb may be, all the followers have to do is watch and listen.
Cindy
10-19-2008, 06:53 PM
because you don't have anyone to follow!
Because the leader always gets smacked in the face with the spider webs first while everyone else watches and laughs as they do the heebie jeebies dance.
Because while no one else is willing to lead, they all want to tell the leader how to lead.
Because its not just you who might fall into the trap, its also everyone who is following.
Because there is always someone breathing down your neck.
The leader doesnt always know just how deep that hole is, or cold that water is, or hard the climb may be, all the followers have to do is watch and listen.
Yes!
"There they go, I must hasten after them, for I am their leader!":whistle
Sounds humourus but it is true.
A leader is usually not born (few are) most are made, & it makes a difference who you were able to be trained by.
God will hold us leaders with a greater degree of accountability than others.
It can be tremendously rewarding!
Encryptus
10-20-2008, 12:19 AM
If ya ain't the lead dog the view pretty much stays the same.
Withdrawn
10-20-2008, 06:01 AM
Serving!
Withdrawn
10-20-2008, 08:59 AM
Self-sacrifice!
Withdrawn
10-20-2008, 08:59 AM
Humility!
marthaolivia
10-20-2008, 09:07 AM
If ya ain't the lead dog the view pretty much stays the same.
:lol This is so true. I had to laugh--the mental image is just too much!
Cajun Boy
10-20-2008, 09:39 AM
Other than dealing with a few dingbats, leadership is a wonderful and rewarding thing. Many times the problem in church leadership is the person trying to lead isn't called or qualified and becomes a driver rather than a leader. People resent a driver.
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 09:53 AM
All my life I have thought lots about this, watched other people, noticed my own feelings...Frustration plays a big part. Dissapointment over investing in people and seeing your time, love, money, hopes go down the drain...
YET there is something that counters out the frustration and that is seeing others that you have invested in become great leaders...
I was reading something a fellow missionary wrote and he expressed how down he felt about someone he lost. Wondering how he failed...I sat looking at his words thinking that is the feelings of any true leader.
We try...some we help some we lose...Jesus himself as a man and human had those feelings...we are not above Him.
Digging4Truth
10-20-2008, 10:02 AM
Because so few leaders can find that balance between sharing ones own thoughts, experiences and wisdom with others while, at the same time, allowing them to find that expression in their own lives.
Many leaders want to make mini-me's out of their congregations. Finding several hundred people who share ones on personal convictions can be a daunting and frustrating task indeed.
Sharing the wisdom & word of God with people our of your own experiences with others as they work out there own salvation with fear and trembling is a much easier task.
And then there is the error of trying to do with our hands what should be accomplished on our knees.
tstew
10-20-2008, 10:06 AM
Because so few leaders can find that balance between sharing ones own thoughts, experiences and wisdom with others while, at the same time, allowing them to find that expression in their own lives.
Many leaders want to make mini-me's out of their congregations. Finding several hundred people who share ones on personal convictions can be a daunting and frustrating task indeed.
Sharing the wisdom & word of God with people our of your own experiences with others as their work out there own salvation with fear and trembling is a much easier task.
And then there is the error of trying to do with our hands what should be accomplished on our knees.
Very good points D4T
Falla39
10-20-2008, 10:08 AM
Because so few leaders can find that balance between sharing ones own thoughts, experiences and wisdom with others while, at the same time, allowing them to find that expression in their own lives.
Many leaders want to make mini-me's out of their congregations. Finding several hundred people who share ones on personal convictions can be a daunting and frustrating task indeed.
Sharing the wisdom & word of God with people our of your own experiences with others as their work out there own salvation with fear and trembling is a much easier task.
And then there is the error of trying to do with our hands what should be accomplished on our knees.
The bolded is a profound statement!
Blessings,
Falla39
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 10:17 AM
yes, that is so good.
Rhoni
10-20-2008, 10:28 AM
Thought this would be a thread that leaders could express their feelings and maybe what has helped us carry on from day to day...
Thoughts????
Sis Alvear,
It is not difficult to be a leader, but is is difficult being a good one.
1. You must understand that the church is God's church and not yours
2. You must delegate even when you can do it better than most you would ask to help
3. You must keep your personal agenda out of it
4. You must be able to mentor leaders and work yourself out of a job.
5. You must not put your own family in all leadership postions to keep people around to defend your turf - because it isn't your turf and if no one else has a shot at being in leadership because of the family circle then you will lose the good leaders you may have gained
6. You must not allow people to put you on a pedestal [ you must admit your shortcomings and not pretend you are infallible]
7. You must put your relationship to God first before your works.
8. You must put your family before your works because if you don't have your family in line then you aren't a capable leader [Biblical]
9. You must delegate - I said that once but you have to learn to say no and not do everything yourself. if you kill yourself doing "things" God will still have a church, and there will be many more leaders born that you did not allow to be leaders while you were doing it all.:friend
Just some things I have learned, observed, and been a part of for many years.
Blessings, Rhoni
A_PoMo
10-20-2008, 11:35 AM
For me, it's simple: nobody wants to follow! :woot
:ursofunny
Reminds me of the Maxwell maxim: "If you think you're leading but nobody is following then you're just taking a walk." :)
Sis Alvear,
It is not difficult to be a leader, but is is difficult being a good one.
1. You must understand that the church is God's church and not yours
2. You must delegate even when you can do it better than most you would ask to help
3. You must keep your personal agenda out of it
4. You must be able to mentor leaders and work yourself out of a job.
5. You must not put your own family in all leadership postions to keep people around to defend your turf - because it isn't your turf and if no one else has a shot at being in leadership because of the family circle then you will lose the good leaders you may have gained
6. You must not allow people to put you on a pedestal [ you must admit your shortcomings and not pretend you are infallible]
7. You must put your relationship to God first before your works.
8. You must put your family before your works because if you don't have your family in line then you aren't a capable leader [Biblical]
9. You must delegate - I said that once but you have to learn to say no and not do everything yourself. if you kill yourself doing "things" God will still have a church, and there will be many more leaders born that you did not allow to be leaders while you were doing it all.:friend
Just some things I have learned, observed, and been a part of for many years.
Blessings, Rhoni
#6 do I have to lie? What about if it is a small pedestal?:whistle
J/K
Good stuff Rhoni, I can't disagree with it.
Rhoni
10-20-2008, 12:19 PM
#6 do I have to lie? What about if it is a small pedestal?:whistle
J/K
Good stuff Rhoni, I can't disagree with it.
Thank you Bro. Ron.
I wish I could claim it all but most of this I got from the John Maxwell leadership series. These were not new Ideas as that is the way I understood them from my Indigeous Church Class for Missions at JCM. Some I learned from hard knocks in ministry that led me to where I am today:friend
Blessings, Rhoni
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 12:41 PM
very good rhoni...and so true...
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 12:47 PM
a real leader is respected by the people. ayour people know if you are a leader. many of our kids work in the work but our proplr will tell you we were harder on them probably than others...I don´t know if that was good but at least no one can truthfully say we made a difference.
Disciplline is common in Brazilian churches so our kids too have sit on the benches for things they did...
Every culture is different so we have to see things in the light of the culture where we live. That is why many times Americans fail they want to do things the American way...It does not work here...
I have read that more missionaries return from Brazil than any other country to never return.
Rhoni
10-20-2008, 12:51 PM
a real leader is respected by the people. ayour people know if you are a leader. many of our kids work in the work but our proplr will tell you we were harder on them probably than others...I don´t know if that was good but at least no one can truthfully say we made a difference.
Disciplline is common in Brazilian churches so our kids too have sit on the benches for things they did...
Every culture is different so we have to see things in the light of the culture where we live. That is why many times Americans fail they want to do things the American way...It does not work here...
I have read that more missionaries return from Brazil than any other country to never return.
Sis. Alvear,
that is why it is so important to train the nationals and that they not be dependent upon you - because when you leave they need to carry on with the work. Who best to know the people and their culture than they themselves.
Blessings, Rhoni
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 12:55 PM
right now I am sitting in the waiting room of a clinic...they are my friends so I am using there internet..
Sister Alvear
10-20-2008, 12:58 PM
so true rhoni...these people need their own people...foreigners stick out most time like a sore thumb...
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