Prayer for the life to come...

[scotty]

For over a year now my wife has been struggling with issues in our lives. Namely the loss of her daughter (my step daughter) who was killed in a car accident when she was 18. This was a couple years ago. Since then she has bounced back and forth from turning to God for peace and hating Him for the loss. This year she has progressed toward the hate more than the grace. A few times she has packed and left for days at a time, but always returned and I have always welcomed her back with no questions asked. I have even followed her (spiritually) away from God so as not to lose touch or track of her hoping I could be the life line between her and God.

Monday I came home from work and she was gone. After several phone conversations this week it has come to her presenting the ultimatum. Her or God. I did not follow this time and my answer is the straight and narrow.

My prayer is for Revelations. Guidance. Marriage. These three I give, live and recieve from Jesus Christ alone. I want to know what God has for me. My life I will live from here forward devoted to HIM no matter what comes. I am married to HIM now.

Pray for my strength to make it to where I need to be in HIM. For HIS guidance to be all I can be in HIM. Pray for HIS blessings in my new life to come and on the Revelations that are forthcoming.

Thank you all,
God bless..]

[Cindy]

Scotty, I will be lifting you up in prayer. And pray that your wife finds peace. It took me a long time to do it. And of course it still haunts me at times. But God is faithful!!!!!!

[deltaguitar]

Wow. Sorry to hear about this, Scotty. Will keep you in my prayers.

[Michael Phelps]

For over a year now my wife has been struggling with issues in our lives. Namely the loss of her daughter (my step daughter) who was killed in a car accident when she was 18. This was a couple years ago. Since then she has bounced back and forth from turning to God for peace and hating Him for the loss. This year she has progressed toward the hate more than the grace. A few times she has packed and left for days at a time, but always returned and I have always welcomed her back with no questions asked. I have even followed her (spiritually) away from God so as not to lose touch or track of her hoping I could be the life line between her and God.

Monday I came home from work and she was gone. After several phone conversations this week it has come to her presenting the ultimatum. Her or God. I did not follow this time and my answer is the straight and narrow.

My prayer is for Revelations. Guidance. Marriage. These three I give, live and recieve from Jesus Christ alone. I want to know what God has for me. My life I will live from here forward devoted to HIM no matter what comes. I am married to HIM now.

Pray for my strength to make it to where I need to be in HIM. For HIS guidance to be all I can be in HIM. Pray for HIS blessings in my new life to come and on the Revelations that are forthcoming.

Thank you all,
God bless..]

Praying here, Scotty........it's a tough situation, but I know God will give you peace.

[Sister Alvear]

I am so sorry You both will be in my prayers.

[nahkoe]

Praying for you Scotty.

I'm so, so sorry.

[Kay B]

Praying for you here.

[ILG]

This has got to be hard, Scotty. I wonder if there is some middle ground. Maybe if you asked her what she meant by her or God? Obviously, you can't leave God, but I wonder if there are things you could do to shift your priorities a bit. It seems she feels she is competing for your love somehow and perhaps with the church (NOT GOD). If you can still love and serve God, but shift your priorities so she doesn't feel she is competing, maybe that would help. I am not trying to tell you what to do, because I don't know your whole situation, but I hope maybe this can help a little.

[OneAccord]

Bro. Scotty- I'm very sorry to hear this. I will be praying for you. I don't know what I could do to help, and sure don't know what to say, but... if theres anything I can do, brother....

[Digging4Truth]

Wow... this is a struggle I cannot imagine...

But I can pray... and will.

[Cindy]

This has got to be hard, Scotty. I wonder if there is some middle ground. Maybe if you asked her what she meant by her or God? Obviously, you can't leave God, but I wonder if there are things you could do to shift your priorities a bit. It seems she feels she is competing for your love somehow and perhaps with the church (NOT GOD). If you can still love and serve God, but shift your priorities so she doesn't feel she is competing, maybe that would help. I am not trying to tell you what to do, because I don't know your whole situation, but I hope maybe this can help a little.

It's more likely her and God, not her and Scotty, or Scotty and God. She probably doesn't want to be around anyone that isn't as mad at God as she is. It's really hard when you are that angry at God. He can only love her and pray for her, he cannot abandon God for her. I know you were not suggesting that.

[ILG]

It's more likely her and God, not her and Scotty, or Scotty and God. She probably doesn't want to be around anyone that isn't as mad at God as she is. It's really hard when you are that angry at God. He can only love her and pray for her, he cannot abandon God for her. I know you were not suggesting that.

I guess only she can answer these questions. We are only guessing and making suggestions for Scotty, right?

[Cindy]

I guess only she can answer these questions. We are only guessing and making suggestions for Scotty, right?

Yes, but I have buried 3 children. And grief is very personal and selfish.

[Sherri]

Scotty--I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I can't imagine the pain. But I will pray for you, and for your wife to come to terms with the Lord.

And Cindy, I had no idea about your children. I'm so sorry!!!

[ILG]

Yes, but I have buried 3 children. And grief is very personal and selfish.

Three children?? I am so sorry. Can you PM me and let me know how? (So as not to hijack Scotty's thread). I have never lost a child so I cannot imagine...or maybe sharing here can help Scotty too.

[Margies3]

Scotty, my 17 year old niece died in a car accident a year and a half ago. Her mom is still suffering terribly. I know that it is still painful for all of us, but I can't imagine how it would feel to be the parent of the child who died. If it's this bad for us, how much worse it must be for them.

I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter. And about your wife. I'll be praying for both of you. Has she considered counseling?

By the way, anger is a stage of the grieving process, as I'm sure you know. But if she seems to be stuck in that stage, it really is time to suggest intervention. At the same time, you have to recognize that everyone grieves in their own way and at their own pace.

You've got a tough road ahead of you, my friend. We're here for you. We'll be praying. Let us know if there is anything else you want us to do.

[Tina]

I will be praying.

[Cindy]

I can only tell y'all by my experiences. And the really tough part is, you want to be alone, but yet you want people around. You just don't want them bothering you, but you need to know someone is around. And it takes as long as it takes. It may seem like a long time to others, but to someone in grief it may seem like an eternity and just minutes at the same time.

[Ron]

Scotty, I am so sorry for what you are facing!
I am praying!

[jezebelslayer]

Bless your heart. I am praying for you and your wife.

[RandyWayne]

My younger sister lost her two newborn twins a few years ago.
They are still dealing with it, but for the first year, they never stepped foot inside a church. Not because they were angry at God, but they didn't want any well wishers telling them how sorry they were.
(One guy who really helped them out during time was Rev. Ray Highfield)
The thing that people did RIGHT when dealing with them is not try to equate the local church and church attendance with God.

I am praying for the two of you and your wife. Everyone has their own way of dealing, and needing to deal, with these type of tragedies.

[live4him]

well scotty we are praying for you always remember God is the Lifter of your head and he will never leave you nor forsake you, and best of all he is our comforter, hang in there, thats all you can do, life up your head, god bless

[Pressing-On]

I'm sorry for this situation in your life, Scotty! You've made the wise and only choice because you know God is the only one that can help and heal.

I'm praying with you!!!!!

[crakjak]

Scotty,

May the Lord show you the paths that He has set before you, and give you the strength to walk in them.
I know this has to be very hard, and I will lift you and your wife up in prayer.

I don't know if your wife has read "The Shack" by William P. Young, it is a beautiful story, dealing with "Great Sadness", it is fiction, yet so real to life. It just might be a way for her to see her loss in a totally different light.

Just my thoughts after reading your post.

God bless you, brother.

[rgcraig]

Scotty,

Just seeing this and I will be remember you and your wife!

[Sweet Pea]

Scotty, I am so sorry for what you are facing!

May the peace that passeth all understanding surround you today!

May Jesus wrap His arms around your wife and begin the deep healing process!

He never gives up on us - we will pray that your wife's relationship with God will be restored and your marriage will be healed!

[Blubayou]

Scotty-Just seeing this- I am so sorry about your situation- I will be praying for you and your wife.

[Up2MyNeck]

Scotty,
I lost my 21-year-old son several years ago and almost lost my identity in my grief. After 3 years of trying to 'hold it all together', I sought counseling. My marriage was on the rocks, my relationships were in tatters, and I was holding God at arms length but did not realize that. I had built walls to keep out the pain, but in doing so I had walled out the most important people in my life. Through grief counseling, I discovered ways to let my pain out and allow God back in. I'm happy to say that God never left my side during this process and today our relationship is healthy and my faith has been restored. Your wife is stalled in the phase of grieving called 'anger'. Christian counseling and consistent prayer are the only answers for your present situation. A loving church family and a sensitive pastor are vital tools in this grieving process, so you should never consider abandoning your church, no matter what your hurting wife says. She is a different person now, forever changed by her loss, and not thinking clearly. It takes 3-5 years for a loss of this magnitude to become manageable, so she has many months of crisis coping yet to endure. Jesus is the best Counselor available to a hurting mother and I will pray that your wife can reach past her pain and accept His help. My heart goes out to you both!

[Coffee99]

Scotty, I can't possibly relate to your situation because I've never experienced it. I can imagine but cannot know. But, I can and will pray for you and your wife.

[LaVonne]

Praying for you Scotty!

[TalkLady]

Scotty, I will be praying for you and your wife. So sorry to hear this.