View Full Version : Can you love more than one???
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 01:09 PM
I know that we have talked about this on here a couple times and I wanted to rehash it cause I think it is an interesting topic. Do you believe or not believe that it is possible to love more than one person at a time? Example can a wife love her husband and yet also love another person intimately? I am not talking about loving kids the same, but that is a fair example on showing multiple strands of love at once.
I think that it is very possible--but not saying I am right. That being said I am not for it and I think that it is wrong. Just want to debate the topic. I do think that while loving two people that the love can not be equal between the two. I think that one person will for whatever reason have more love given to them over the other person. Like a wife or husband might give more love to the spouse because of the kids they share or the time spent together and yet still love another person too.
Disclaimer:
this topic doesn't reflect my life but I am bringing up as a topic of debate.
Sister Alvear
05-05-2009, 01:10 PM
I could not ...
n david
05-05-2009, 01:15 PM
I'm sure you could love your wife/husband and another. But the Bible may term that as adultery. You're not being a faithful husband/wife if you've got someone on the side that's competing for attention/affection.
No man can serve two masters!:D
Rhoni
05-05-2009, 01:59 PM
I know that we have talked about this on here a couple times and I wanted to rehash it cause I think it is an interesting topic. Do you believe or not believe that it is possible to love more than one person at a time? Example can a wife love her husband and yet also love another person intimately? I am not talking about loving kids the same, but that is a fair example on showing multiple strands of love at once.
I think that it is very possible--but not saying I am right. That being said I am not for it and I think that it is wrong. Just want to debate the topic. I do think that while loving two people that the love can not be equal between the two. I think that one person will for whatever reason have more love given to them over the other person. Like a wife or husband might give more love to the spouse because of the kids they share or the time spent together and yet still love another person too.
Disclaimer:
this topic doesn't reflect my life but I am bringing up as a topic of debate.
Absolutely. You can love two different men [speaking of a woman] for many different things. When I was at JCM, believe it or not - I loved two different men and had to make a conscious choice between the two. Sis. David Bernard prayed with me one night about this very thing. When I listened to God and searched my heart...the one I chose was the one I could trust, that had obvious integrity, and was a one-woman man. The other I would never have totally trusted or committed to.
I will say though, after I made my decision, God took all feelings for this other person out of my heart and I NEVER struggled with it again.
Blessings, Rhoni
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 01:59 PM
No man can serve two masters!:D
Ron, not a valid arguement here I think. I think that is actually talking about masters and things you serve not a spouse.
Ron, not a valid arguement here I think. I think that is actually talking about masters and things you serve not a spouse.
Are you married?:foottap
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 02:02 PM
I'm sure you could love your wife/husband and another. But the Bible may term that as adultery. You're not being a faithful husband/wife if you've got someone on the side that's competing for attention/affection.
I agree, but many would argue that loving more than 1 is not possible
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 02:03 PM
Yes, for 7 years.....I know where you were/are going. I wear the pants in the family....the ones she tells me to wear.
Yes, for 7 years.....I know where you were/are going. I wear the pants in the family....the ones she tells me to wear.
:ursofunny
Rhoni
05-05-2009, 02:05 PM
I think that when your needs are not getting met by a spouse for whatever reason, it puts you in a place of temptation to form a bond with another person who can meet this need [It isn't always about sex]. In order to affair proof your marriage you must know that not any one person can meet all your needs. You must not be tempted to form relationships which might jeopardize your relationship.
For this reason, the scriptures talk about not defrauding one another. The Bible is full of helpful ways to keep yourself single-minded and not searching for another to meet a need you feel your spouse isn't meeting for you. And, just remember...prayer changes things.
Blessings, Rhoni
FTR, I could not love more than one person in the way an intimate love is supposed to be between a man & wife.
Stilllll, those Mormons may be on to something......:hmmm
:hypercoffee
Hoovie
05-05-2009, 02:06 PM
One can try... but it's like a ball and chain.
I know that we have talked about this on here a couple times and I wanted to rehash it cause I think it is an interesting topic. Do you believe or not believe that it is possible to love more than one person at a time? Example can a wife love her husband and yet also love another person intimately? I am not talking about loving kids the same, but that is a fair example on showing multiple strands of love at once.
I think that it is very possible--but not saying I am right. That being said I am not for it and I think that it is wrong. Just want to debate the topic. I do think that while loving two people that the love can not be equal between the two. I think that one person will for whatever reason have more love given to them over the other person. Like a wife or husband might give more love to the spouse because of the kids they share or the time spent together and yet still love another person too.
Disclaimer:
this topic doesn't reflect my life but I am bringing up as a topic of debate.
I do think it's possible.
It's just as possible to love more than one as it is to be attracted to more than one.
Rhoni
05-05-2009, 02:07 PM
I do think it's possible.
It's just as possible to love more than one as it is to be attracted to more than one.
:thumbsup We finally agree...i knew there would be something.:ursofunny
Blessings, Rhoni
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 02:10 PM
I do think it's possible.
It's just as possible to love more than one as it is to be attracted to more than one.
I agree with you. I think that attraction can turn into emotional attachments, but doesn't have to turn into love. I guess that why I bring this up is that someone told me that you can only love one and the other would be lust.....not sure that I agree with that. But you are right here.
I agree with you. I think that attraction can turn into emotional attachments, but doesn't have to turn into love. I guess that why I bring this up is that someone told me that you can only love one and the other would be lust.....not sure that I agree with that. But you are right here.
Now hold on, are we talking love or infatuation?
There is a difference.
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 02:15 PM
I am actually talking about love, but I was told by someone the other day that it is impossible to love more than one person. That one was love and the other lust or both were lust.
*AQuietPlace*
05-05-2009, 02:18 PM
I think it is possible, but you should go to great lengths to avoid it.
The person who told you the other 'love' would be lust has a good point. True love is sacrificial, and usually if you find yourself 'loving' two people, one of those 'loves' is a selfish love. Usually.
Rhoni
05-05-2009, 02:19 PM
I think that when your needs are not getting met by a spouse for whatever reason, it puts you in a place of temptation to form a bond with another person who can meet this need [It isn't always about sex]. In order to affair proof your marriage you must know that not any one person can meet all your needs. You must not be tempted to form relationships which might jeopardize your relationship.
For this reason, the scriptures talk about not defrauding one another. The Bible is full of helpful ways to keep yourself single-minded and not searching for another to meet a need you feel your spouse isn't meeting for you. And, just remember...prayer changes things.
Blessings, Rhoni
I think it is possible, but you should go to great lengths to avoid it.
The person who said the other would be lust has a good point. True love is sacrificial, and usually if you find yourself 'loving' two people, one of those 'loves' is a selfish love. Usually.
:thumbsup
edjen01
05-05-2009, 02:29 PM
as love is a choice....i think you could choose to love more than one....but I imagine it would be difficult to dedicate that much time to 2(or more) different people.
Jack Shephard
05-05-2009, 03:45 PM
EDJEN, you are on to something here. This is what I think. I think that it is possible to love another, but at great cost.
Sept5SavedTeen
05-05-2009, 04:14 PM
If a brother has multiple wives he should (try to) care and love all of them the same. Christians should not "fall in love" though with the spouses of others or have things like infedelity named among them, and saints should avoid any settings conducive to emotional affairs.
-Bro. Alex
MissBrattified
05-05-2009, 06:11 PM
I do think it's possible.
It's just as possible to love more than one as it is to be attracted to more than one.
I have to agree. That's where self-control steps in. :thumbsup
Feeling affection for someone is not the same as devoting yourself to them IN love, in a marital relationship. Too many people mistake feelings of affection or attraction for *love.*
So I would say that you can be attracted to or feel affection for more than one person, but you decide who you will actually love. :)
Hoovie
05-05-2009, 07:34 PM
I have to agree. That's where self-control steps in. :thumbsup
Feeling affection for someone is not the same as devoting yourself to them IN love, in a marital relationship. Too many people mistake feelings of affection or attraction for *love.*
So I would say that you can be attracted to or feel affection for more than one person, but you decide who you will actually love. :)
This is very true. Furthermore, the depth of ones feelings is often not the best gauge in choosing a lifelong mate.
RandyWayne
05-05-2009, 07:38 PM
as love is a choice....i think you could choose to love more than one....but I imagine it would be difficult to dedicate that much time to 2(or more) different people.
All you can do is love the one your with....
....love the one your with.
:heart
Cindy
05-05-2009, 07:41 PM
No. We know that love is unselfish. In reality one or the other will be deprived of something. Intimacy, time, etc. I do think you can become infatuated for a time, but not really love more than one at the same time in equality.
committed
05-09-2009, 05:44 AM
I know that we have talked about this on here a couple times and I wanted to rehash it cause I think it is an interesting topic. Do you believe or not believe that it is possible to love more than one person at a time? Example can a wife love her husband and yet also love another person intimately? I am not talking about loving kids the same, but that is a fair example on showing multiple strands of love at once.
I think that it is very possible--but not saying I am right. That being said I am not for it and I think that it is wrong. Just want to debate the topic. I do think that while loving two people that the love can not be equal between the two. I think that one person will for whatever reason have more love given to them over the other person. Like a wife or husband might give more love to the spouse because of the kids they share or the time spent together and yet still love another person too.
Disclaimer:
this topic doesn't reflect my life but I am bringing up as a topic of debate.
This one scares me JT. To even think about or debate it is dangerous! The Bible says, "Whatsoever things are good, just, pure, honest, of GOOD report....THINK on THESE THINGS..."
It also says you should be the husband of ONE WIFE - and if you even LOOK UPON another woman, it's adultery.
SOUNWORTHY
05-09-2009, 06:22 AM
I don't think you can can love another as you love your wife. That is a love that is reserved for her alone. You can and are required to love others as you love yourself but your love for your wife should be a love that goes beyond the love you have for yourself. Your love for your wife or husband should be in a catagory with your love for God. God and mate in that order.
Hoovie
05-09-2009, 07:30 AM
They taught us in "Regents" that we could.
:)
Falla39
05-09-2009, 07:45 AM
If we put the first and greatest commandment into practice and get it into our hearts
and then likewise the second that is like unto the first, we SHOULD have no problem
with loving in it proper order.
If we do not love the Lord our God with ALL our heart, soul, mind and strength, and then
our neighbor as ourselves, we are on our own. And what a MESS mankind can make "on
their own". All we have to do is look into the Word of God and see how man always seem-
ed to fall into idolatry. Other "gods" "loves" drawing our attention away from the One True
and LIVING GOD!
IF we love that ONE with all our heart, soul, mind and strenth, we won't have to ask
the question, "Can we love more than one"?? We will know and do what is right in the
sight of GOD.
Chorus of an old, old song:
Is thy heart right with God
Washed in the crimson flood
Cleansed and made holy, humble and lowly
Right in the sight of God?
Falla39
Pressing-On
05-09-2009, 09:20 AM
I have to agree. That's where self-control steps in. :thumbsup
Feeling affection for someone is not the same as devoting yourself to them IN love, in a marital relationship. Too many people mistake feelings of affection or attraction for *love.*
So I would say that you can be attracted to or feel affection for more than one person, but you decide who you will actually love. :)
I believe that not every attraction is based only on feelings of affection, attraction, infatuation or lust. I believe that you can actually know that you love a person. It is inherent in man to love, therefore, it's a given that it is possible.
Where I differ with you here is when you say, "you will decide who you will actually love". I think it would be better put as, "you decide who you will be loyal to.
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