UPC Minister engaged to former Porn Star

[Dante]

The article speaks for itself. A former porn star has been born again, and is now seeking to follow Christ. Good for her. We all have a past, but better yet, now in Christ we all have a future!

http://www.syracuse.com/news/index.ssf/2014/10/how_a_porn_actress_and_a_preacher_fell_in_love.htm l

[shazeep]

:lol yikes

[n david]

Uh...She made her last x-rated movie in June. They met in August and they're already engaged....getting married in January.

Mmmkay

[Aquila]

The article speaks for itself. A former porn star has been born again, and is now seeking to follow Christ. Good for her. We all have a past, but better yet, now in Christ we all have a future!

http://www.syracuse.com/news/index.ssf/2014/10/how_a_porn_actress_and_a_preacher_fell_in_love.htm l

Good for them... :)

Of course... not many men would be down with the idea of marrying an x-rated movie star. :kiss :covereyes

:lol

[acjcpastor]

Even if we leave the whole porn star thing out of this, isn't it a little soon after her conversion for a minister to be proposing marriage to her? Talk about unequally yoked. She's still a babe (no pun intended), I mean a babe in Christ. IMHO it would have been prudent for this minister to allow her some time and space to grow and become stable in her personal walk with Christ before getting into such a serious relationship her.

[BrotherEastman]

I wish them well in their future.

[n david]

So many red flags. But he's 23 and likely isn't thinking with his head.

She owned an adult club for years, it was shut down over violations. In March she was DUI. In June she filmed an x-rated movie.

I understand God can change a person, but sin leaves stains. This young man is a pastor. How can he expect to effectively counsel anyone, especially another couple? At 23 years old, it has to be difficult enough to counsel older saints; put his wife in the mix and it adds to the difficulty.

I'd be finding another church, if I were a member there.

[BrotherEastman]

So many red flags. But he's 23 and likely isn't thinking with his head.

She owned an adult club for years, it was shut down over violations. In March she was DUI. In June she filmed an x-rated movie.

I understand God can change a person, but sin leaves stains. This young man is a pastor. How can he expect to effectively counsel anyone, especially another couple? At 23 years old, it has to be difficult enough to counsel older saints; put his wife in the mix and it adds to the difficulty.

I'd be finding another church, if I were a member there.

I think it is his dad that is the Pastor, although I might've misread the link.

[Miss Scarlett]

I think it is his dad that is the Pastor, although I might've misread the link.

DiGregorio and Bassette starting dating in August.

She had started going to church at Oswego River of Life, where Bassette's father is the minister. DiGregorio noticed Bassette when he came there to perform some baptisms over the summer. But she didn't think of dating him.

Bassette, 23, was young for her.

Enter Jessica Reynolds, DiGregorio's sister. She's been friends with Bassette for years, he said, and thought the two of them would hit it off. Bassette said she didn't tell the two of them she was setting them up. Instead, she just invited them both to a card game without telling the other.

The chemistry was instant. They started dating immediately. And she started attending his smaller church: Pentecostals of Fulton.

This is a disaster waiting to happen, He is not mature enough to take on the responsibility of raising a 14 year old child. It would be great and wonderful if it is a success story.

[Abiding Now]

Sounds like another UPC success story. :thumbsup

[n david]

I think it is his dad that is the Pastor, although I might've misread the link.
The dad is a Senior Pastor of a church, the son is a Pastor at a different church.

[Praxeas]

Gone are the days when preachers look for A B C and D in a potential preachers wife. Now they settle for X X and X :-)

[MawMaw]

Hopefully the young lady has truly had a life changing experience
with God! I still think the young man should have waited for a good
while before wanting to marry her though.

[MissBrattified]

What an absolutely ridiculous thread. :foottap If she has turned her life around, why are we even discussing this? She isn't anything other than a Christian, whose sins are covered by the blood of Christ, the same as the rest of us. This title should read: "UPC Minister's Son Engaged To a New Convert In New York." :throwrock

[BrotherEastman]

The dad is a Senior Pastor of a church, the son is a Pastor at a different church.

I see, well it does seem quite unorthodox to become a pastor's wife from a porn star.

[BrotherEastman]

Gone are the days when preachers look for A B C and D in a potential preachers wife. Now they settle for X X and X :-)

lol

[BrotherEastman]

What an absolutely ridiculous thread. :foottap If she has turned her life around, why are we even discussing this? She isn't anything other than a Christian, whose sins are covered by the blood of Christ, the same as the rest of us. This title should read: "UPC Minister's Son Engaged To a New Convert In New York." :throwrock

True enough!!!!!

[Fionn mac Cumh]

To many pompous buttholes in this thread.

[BrotherEastman]

To many pompous buttholes in this thread.

Although I understand the sentiment, I would've put it a different way. (say in love)

[Steve Epley]

Gone are the days when preachers look for A B C and D in a potential preachers wife. Now they settle for X X and X :-)

:highfive

[Sean]

A little reminder.....


Luke 7:36-50King James Version (KJV)

36 And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee's house, and sat down to meat.

37 And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster box of ointment,

38 And stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment.

39 Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner.

40 And Jesus answering said unto him, Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on.

41 There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owed five hundred pence, and the other fifty.

42 And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most?

43 Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. And he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged.

44 And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head.

45 Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.

46 My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment.

47 Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.

48 And he said unto her, Thy sins are forgiven.

49 And they that sat at meat with him began to say within themselves, Who is this that forgiveth sins also?

50 And he said to the woman, Thy faith hath saved thee; go in peace


What is the Holy Ghost saying to you right now?

[Sean]

Lets not bring up folks' sinful pasts against them, that is unthinkable for those that are walking in the Spirit.

[Sean]

This thread should be deleted....

[Steve Epley]

Lets not bring up folks' sinful pasts against them

The problem is not the past it is the present. Any minister marrying a brand new convert is not very wise. God surely can and will forgive her past. We all become new creatures with no past. Wisdom would tell any minister to wait and see some tract record.

[Sean]

Yes bro., but all this stuff is in confidentiality. This thread is trashing a soul that has repented. We are no different than the Pharisee Simon in the passage I presented.

I felt the Holy Ghost smite me with sorrow as I posted that.

[Disciple4life]

So the lesson we learned was that cards are of the devil and everybody should have refused the invite to the card game. Ha! Ha!! HAAA!!! :heeheehee

[Steve Epley]

Yes bro., but all this stuff is in confidentiality. This thread is trashing a soul that has repented. We are no different than the Pharisee Simon in the passage I presented.

I felt the Holy Ghost smite me with sorrow as I posted that.

If she is forgiven her past is gone. Baptism remits all sins. But evidently no confidentiality is involved since they made it public.

[Michael The Disciple]

The problem is not the past it is the present. Any minister marrying a brand new convert is not very wise. God surely can and will forgive her past. We all become new creatures with no past. Wisdom would tell any minister to wait and see some tract record.

Yes its a wisdom issue.

[Michael The Disciple]

If she is forgiven her past is gone. Baptism remits all sins. But evidently no confidentiality is involved since they made it public.

This thread reminds me of a testimony from Christ Gospel Church. About 1979 we met a young woman from that group. She told us she had been a stripper before.

She got to seeking "God" but not through Jesus rather through Buddhism and New Age teaching. She said one night she was chanting
in her house when suddenly she saw swirls of like light energy in her room.

As she watched she said all of it came together in one place and there stood Jesus Christ! She said he opened his mouth and said "My Son and I are one"! She said the room became full of the greatest sensation of love imaginable and after awhile she became aware that she was singing in other languages in the deepest love for Jesus Christ.

She said she had been led to Christ Gospel Church where she was baptized and serving the Lord. We accepted her invite to visit her Church one night so we saw the change in her life.

So just a testimony I thought you might enjoy and proof that Jesus has power to save to the uttermost!

[Abiding Now]

John 8:7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

[n david]

Her sins are past and forgiven. I haven't seen anyone refute that. The discussion is the lack of wisdom on the part of the young pastor, who jumped into an engagement with a new convert. Doesn't matter what she did pre-conversion, I don't care if she was a Duggar, the problem is the lack of judgment on the pastor rushing into the relationship.

[CC1]

So many red flags. But he's 23 and likely isn't thinking with his head.

She owned an adult club for years, it was shut down over violations. In March she was DUI. In June she filmed an x-rated movie.

I understand God can change a person, but sin leaves stains. This young man is a pastor. How can he expect to effectively counsel anyone, especially another couple? At 23 years old, it has to be difficult enough to counsel older saints; put his wife in the mix and it adds to the difficulty.

I'd be finding another church, if I were a member there.

I agree with you. Particularly your first sentence. I think it will be wonderful for this woman to have a new life and marry but this is way too soon. She needs to get grounded in Christ first then think about a husband. Even at 23 years old this man should know all this if he is a pastor. Of course as you pointed out he is not thinking with his intellect at this point.

[Praxeas]

What an absolutely ridiculous thread. :foottap If she has turned her life around, why are we even discussing this? She isn't anything other than a Christian, whose sins are covered by the blood of Christ, the same as the rest of us. This title should read: "UPC Minister's Son Engaged To a New Convert In New York." :throwrock
Because she has not been a convert long. That seems to be the concern..and they were not dating long and he is very young

[CC1]

The problem is not the past it is the present. Any minister marrying a brand new convert is not very wise. God surely can and will forgive her past. We all become new creatures with no past. Wisdom would tell any minister to wait and see some tract record.

This is the situation in a nutshell. Good post.

[Abiding Now]

Her sins are past and forgiven. I haven't seen anyone refute that. The discussion is the lack of wisdom on the part of the young pastor, who jumped into an engagement with a new convert. Doesn't matter what she did pre-conversion, I don't care if she was a Duggar, the problem is the lack of judgment on the pastor rushing into the relationship.

I believe you said it correctly in your other post.

So many red flags. But he's 23 and likely isn't thinking with his head.
She owned an adult club for years, it was shut down over violations. In March she was DUI. In June she filmed an x-rated movie.

I understand God can change a person, but sin leaves stains. This young man is a pastor. How can he expect to effectively counsel anyone, especially another couple? At 23 years old, it has to be difficult enough to counsel older saints; put his wife in the mix and it adds to the difficulty.

I'd be finding another church, if I were a member there.



:heeheehee

[johnny44]

I believe you said it correctly in your other post.





:heeheeheewasn't there a prophet that married a hooker.

[Praxeas]

Yes bro., but all this stuff is in confidentiality. This thread is trashing a soul that has repented. We are no different than the Pharisee Simon in the passage I presented.

I felt the Holy Ghost smite me with sorrow as I posted that.
No it's not! It was in the news

[Abiding Now]

wasn't there a prophet that married a hooker.

Yeah he did and if I remember correctly, she left him and went back to her old ways. That story is a story of heartache and redemption, but IMHO mostly heartache.

[Praxeas]

wasn't there a prophet that married a hooker.The bible does not call them hookers...you have to use only official KJV words...they are whores :heeheehee

[Abiding Now]

Hos 1:2 The beginning of the word of the LORD by Hosea. And the LORD said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms: for the land hath committed great whoredom, departing from the LORD.

[Dante]

Praise God that the woman from Oswego, NY is a "whore no more!" She's been washed by the blood and regenerated by the Holy Spirit. Amen.

[Dante]

David Bassette isn't the first minister to marry someone with a sordid past.

Rev. Gene Scott, a former AoG minister, married Melissa Scott (a former adult entertainer). When he passed away, she carried on his ministry and still preaches in Glendale, CA.

http://www.pastormelissascott.com/index.shtml

[MissBrattified]

The problem is not the past it is the present. Any minister marrying a brand new convert is not very wise. God surely can and will forgive her past. We all become new creatures with no past. Wisdom would tell any minister to wait and see some tract record.

I agree with the idea of marrying a new convert being problematic because of the maturity issue, but I think her "past" should be left alone entirely unless she revisits it. Even though it's public, I still don't think it should be dinnertime conversation for those of who are, essentially, now her fellow Christians.

Because she has not been a convert long. That seems to be the concern..and they were not dating long and he is very young

Yes, and IMO that should be the only thing up for discussion. Hence my unofficial "title change."

As for the young man...this could be a case of what Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls "Damsel-In-Distress" syndrome. It's easy to assume that he's interested because of the industry she was involved in, but it's more likely that the pastor's son is trying to "save" her.

Regardless, I think this is their business, and I don't think it really belongs here. This is really, REALLY personal business. IMO.

[Miss Scarlett]

What an absolutely ridiculous thread. :foottap If she has turned her life around, why are we even discussing this? She isn't anything other than a Christian, whose sins are covered by the blood of Christ, the same as the rest of us. This title should read: "UPC Minister's Son Engaged To a New Convert In New York." :throwrock

I see, well it does seem quite unorthodox to become a pastor's wife from a porn star.

To many pompous buttholes in this thread.

Although I understand the sentiment, I would've put it a different way. (say in love)

It is not without validity that most of our impressions or beliefs about our family, close friends, and acquaintances automatically involve knowledge about their character as a part of their reputation. Obviously, our interactions give us insight to these people's characters and reputations, whether our perceptions are true or false. Those who know us best will see any growth of character or lack of it. Even so, some can have blind spots in relation to a particular person (for instance, a mother may ignore her son's flaws), or the person may have a talent for concealing their shortcomings, even from those closest to them.

We see a positive side of this in Acts 6:1-3, where the apostles tell the church to choose seven men to become deacons. One of the criteria was that these men were to be "of good reputation," which translates from the Greek word martureo, meaning "to be a witness, that is, to testify (literally or figuratively)." The KJV also renders martureo as "give [evidence]," "bear record," "obtain a good honest report," "be well reported of."

These men were to show evidence of God's Spirit and wisdom in their lives, a combination of a good name as well as growth in character. It is interesting that, because they knew them best, the people were to select these men according to their character.
So, How is the Adult Movie Woman be any different than those who are elected as Deacons in the church, especially if she is to become the first lady of the church.:throwrock

[MissBrattified]

It is not without validity that most of our impressions or beliefs about our family, close friends, and acquaintances automatically involve knowledge about their character as a part of their reputation. Obviously, our interactions give us insight to these people's characters and reputations, whether our perceptions are true or false. Those who know us best will see any growth of character or lack of it. Even so, some can have blind spots in relation to a particular person (for instance, a mother may ignore her son's flaws), or the person may have a talent for concealing their shortcomings, even from those closest to them.

We see a positive side of this in Acts 6:1-3, where the apostles tell the church to choose seven men to become deacons. One of the criteria was that these men were to be "of good reputation," which translates from the Greek word martureo, meaning "to be a witness, that is, to testify (literally or figuratively)." The KJV also renders martureo as "give [evidence]," "bear record," "obtain a good honest report," "be well reported of."

These men were to show evidence of God's Spirit and wisdom in their lives, a combination of a good name as well as growth in character. It is interesting that, because they knew them best, the people were to select these men according to their character.
So, How is the Adult Movie Woman be any different than those who are elected as Deacons in the church, especially if she is to become the first lady of the church.:throwrock

Hold up...Do we reach back before the cross to find a man's qualifications? Or only from conversion forward? You're going to disqualify a LOT of men from ministry if you start digging through their pre-Christianity lives!

[ILG]

I think they need to date for a while. This thing is moving too fast IMO.

[Miss Scarlett]

Hold up...Do we reach back before the cross to find a man's qualifications? Or only from conversion forward? You're going to disqualify a LOT of men from ministry if you start digging through their pre-Christianity lives!

Hey, I just looked up scripture in the New Testament, it's not my words, but Bible. Can't do anything about that. Either we believe what scripture says, or we don't. 6th Chapter Of Acts.

[Miss Scarlett]

Also, in the 3rd chapter of 1 Timothy it has instructions for the Bishop. And his wife in Chapter 3: 11 instructs the wife to be grave, not slanderers, sober faithful in all things. Now without time, how do we know what she is? New Testament also.

[MissBrattified]

Hey, I just looked up scripture in the New Testament, it's not my words, but Bible. Can't do anything about that. Either we believe what scripture says, or we don't. 6th Chapter Of Acts.

Yes, but we have to take the whole thing. If a woman's past as a (well, any kind of sinner) PRE-Christ disqualifies her from being the wife of a minister, then Paul's past as a MURDERER pre-Christ would disqualify him, too, don't you think? And how about this:

"9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God."" I Corinthians 6:9-11

I'm fairly certain that the qualifications for bishops and deacons apply to their Christian life; not before they were saved from being sinners. :foottap I think you might want to hesitate before you go digging up bones.

[MissBrattified]

Also, in the 3rd chapter of 1 Timothy it has instructions for the Bishop. And his wife in Chapter 3: 11 instructs the wife to be grave, not slanderers, sober faithful in all things. Now without time, how do we know what she is? New Testament also.

Oh, so you ARE referring only to her life after conversion, then? Why didn't you say so? :) :coffee2

This comment made it seem like you thought that her life as a sinner would disqualify her from being a minister's wife: "How is the Adult Movie Woman be any different than those who are elected as Deacons in the church, especially if she is to become the first lady of the church?"

[MissBrattified]

For clarification: I'm not arguing for the specifics of this situation and saying that the pastor's son should or shouldn't marry the woman who has been *named* on this thread. I'm just saying that on PRINCIPLE, it isn't our business, and her past pre-Christ shouldn't matter to us.

I find it particularly repugnant that the thread title framed her by her past instead of her present.

[Sean]

Now I know what goes on in ministers meetings

[Praxeas]

David Bassette isn't the first minister to marry someone with a sordid past.

Rev. Gene Scott, a former AoG minister, married Melissa Scott (a former adult entertainer). When he passed away, she carried on his ministry and still preaches in Glendale, CA.

http://www.pastormelissascott.com/index.shtml
I didn't know that. She did seem a lot younger

[Praxeas]

I agree with the idea of marrying a new convert being problematic because of the maturity issue, but I think her "past" should be left alone entirely unless she revisits it. Even though it's public, I still don't think it should be dinnertime conversation for those of who are, essentially, now her fellow Christians.



Yes, and IMO that should be the only thing up for discussion. Hence my unofficial "title change."

As for the young man...this could be a case of what Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls "Damsel-In-Distress" syndrome. It's easy to assume that he's interested because of the industry she was involved in, but it's more likely that the pastor's son is trying to "save" her.

Regardless, I think this is their business, and I don't think it really belongs here. This is really, REALLY personal business. IMO.
It's public information. They put it out there

[Praxeas]

Also, in the 3rd chapter of 1 Timothy it has instructions for the Bishop. And his wife in Chapter 3: 11 instructs the wife to be grave, not slanderers, sober faithful in all things. Now without time, how do we know what she is? New Testament also.
Hmmm interesting. Technically he never should have been a pastor right? The husband of 1 wife?

But what about Paul? He was an Apostle..was he married?

[Truthseeker]

For clarification: I'm not arguing for the specifics of this situation and saying that the pastor's son should or shouldn't marry the woman who has been *named* on this thread. I'm just saying that on PRINCIPLE, it isn't our business, and her past pre-Christ shouldn't matter to us.

I find it particularly repugnant that the thread title framed her by her past instead of her present.

Yep, TMZ like work.

[Steve Epley]

Yes, but we have to take the whole thing. If a woman's past as a (well, any kind of sinner) PRE-Christ disqualifies her from being the wife of a minister, then Paul's past as a MURDERER pre-Christ would disqualify him, too, don't you think? And how about this:

"9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God."" I Corinthians 6:9-11

I'm fairly certain that the qualifications for bishops and deacons apply to their Christian life; not before they were saved from being sinners. :foottap I think you might want to hesitate before you go digging up bones.

I agree with you however wisdom would dictate a much slower process in this courtship. If she didn't have this past. On this young man it could be a recipe for destruction.

[n david]

wasn't there a prophet that married a hooker.
I may be wrong here, but I very highly doubt God had anything to do with this young Pastor rushing to get married to this woman. Hosea was told by God to marry Gomer, so God could show (through their marriage) His love for Israel.

You cannot honestly compare these two situations to be alike.

[n david]

Hmmm interesting. Technically he never should have been a pastor right? The husband of 1 wife?

But what about Paul? He was an Apostle..was he married?
Not saying he has to be married, only that if he is married, be so to only one wife.

[n david]

Regardless, I think this is their business, and I don't think it really belongs here. This is really, REALLY personal business. IMO.
I agree that this is really personal business. I'm puzzled at why they would contact the local newspaper and offer an interview about it. It's not something of which one should boast, nor is it something which should have been publicly talked about. Nevertheless, it appears they wanted the attention and made the conscious decision to broadcast it via the news.

[Miss Scarlett]

Hmmm interesting. Technically he never should have been a pastor right? The husband of 1 wife?

But what about Paul? He was an Apostle..was he married?

All i'm saying is that God gives us instructions for every situation that comes our way. But do we listen, or step out on our own? I didn't say he should never have been a pastor, and don't know where you got that. In my opinion, if he used wisdom, he would not rush into the situation too soon.

[canam]

Gone are the days when preachers look for A B C and D in a potential preachers wife. Now they settle for X X and X :-)

post of the year !!!! bwhaahaha !!! ps they aint no confidentiallity when you call the Syracuse times ,we had a hooker in our church who bragged that she had over a 120 men ,keep da mouth shut girl !

[Miss Scarlett]

I agree with the idea of marrying a new convert being problematic because of the maturity issue, but I think her "past" should be left alone entirely unless she revisits it. Even though it's public, I still don't think it should be dinnertime conversation for those of who are, essentially, now her fellow Christians.



Yes, and IMO that should be the only thing up for discussion. Hence my unofficial "title change."

As for the young man...this could be a case of what Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls "Damsel-In-Distress" syndrome. It's easy to assume that he's interested because of the industry she was involved in, but it's more likely that the pastor's son is trying to "save" her.


Regardless, I think this is their business, and I don't think it really belongs here. This is really, REALLY personal business. IMO.

If you don't think it should be discussed here, why don't you lock the Thread, or better yet, just delete the whole discussion?

[Praxeas]

Yep, TMZ like work.
It was the title of the article and it was not an expose'. The people seemed to be willing to be interviewed

[StillStanding]

In my experience, I've seen plenty of people do a 180 degree change in order to date and marry someone in the church. A majority of the time, it doesn't end well.

There's a chance that all will end beautifully and this woman will have a powerful testimony. There's also a very good chance that it will all end in disaster. Not much wisdom of wait and see being used, IMO.

All I can do is pray that this doesn't give the local church a black eye. That is what matters most...the local Christian church and it's effect and reputation in the community.

[Praxeas]

It could be hard though...particularly on a young inexperienced man. By inexperienced I don't mean sex. I mean just handling the pressure of everything including her older kids

But it may likely happen that, especially now that it's public, men will recognize her and say things. I hope he handles that well

[johnny44]

I may be wrong here, but I very highly doubt God had anything to do with this young Pastor rushing to get married to this woman. Hosea was told by God to marry Gomer, so God could show (through their marriage) His love for Israel.

You cannot honestly compare these two situations to be alike.Yes we hope she does not go the way of Gomer.

[crakjak]

The problem is not the past it is the present. Any minister marrying a brand new convert is not very wise. God surely can and will forgive her past. We all become new creatures with no past. Wisdom would tell any minister to wait and see some tract record.

Wisdom is sorely lacking in my opinion, I agree with you, Steve.

[BINGO]

Has anyone considered the soul of the young lady who might read these terrible comments posted about her and she gets discouraged and backslides? Who's hands will her blood be on?

I would take this whole thing down for her sake!

[MissBrattified]

If you don't think it should be discussed here, why don't you lock the Thread, or better yet, just delete the whole discussion?

...because I'm not in the habit of censoring threads or comments based on my personal opinion. That would be an abuse of my position as an admin. :coffee2 I was a plain old member here before I was ever a member of the admin team, and I've always been allowed to voice my opinions. My opinion is that this thread stinks. :) My opinion doesn't translate into admin action unless rules are also broken.

There are all sorts of conjectures we can make about the wisdom of this young man's choice in a wife, her sincerity, the future success or failure of their marriage, or even whether she will remain a Christian. I'm only saying that I don't think her past is an appropriate topic for the rest of us. That's all. I think most of us would feel protective about discussion of new converts in our home churches, and I have to wonder what makes this woman seem like fair game? Is it the nature of her past?

[mfblume]

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 CEV (4) Love is kind and patient, never jealous, boastful, proud, or (5) rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do. (6) Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil. (7) Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting.

[MissBrattified]

It's public information. They put it out there

Have you googled her name? (I'm not suggesting you do, but I did.) I was afraid to click on one. single. link. I also deleted the search from my history, considering the sorts of results that came up. Considering her notoriety, I imagine SOME sort of statement was deemed necessary, although I would have still kept the whole thing as private as possible. I wasn't asked, though.... ;)

Maybe the article was a feeble attempt to change the *narrative* about who this woman is. That will be difficult to do, to say the least. And there was the woman at the well....

[mfblume]

We have to be very careful with this sort of thing. Imagine her reading this and losing her victory. She could go right back to the world and fulfil the very thing people have noted here by reading this thread! Likely she won't read it. But what if she did? A wounded spirit cannot be hardly borne.

[MissBrattified]

I agree with you however wisdom would dictate a much slower process in this courtship. If she didn't have this past. On this young man it could be a recipe for destruction.

I don't disagree. At all. The relationship itself is problematic for a variety of reasons, but those situations are best dealt with by those nearest and dearest. My objection to this thread has to do with how it was started, framed, and the comments directed at Ms. DiGregorio's past as if that is our business. There are times when we need to compartmentalize even when we know things about people, in order to treat them as Jesus would.

I'm also a bit disappointed in our collective cynicism about God's ability to take a very broken life and make something wonderful of it.

[Reader]

The title of this thread goes along with the article title, "A former Oswego porn actress falls in love with a preacher; they're getting married."

They provided the picture for the article (this is noted in the article).

If you skim the comments, the reporter stated that the paper heard of their engagement and she called them. They obviously agreed to an interview and openly shared of her past. Crystal linked to a similar article from her own facebook page.

It doesn't sound to me that she has any problem with her past being brought up or discussed.

[KeptByTheWord]

We have to be very careful with this sort of thing. Imagine her reading this and losing her victory. She could go right back to the world and fulfil the very thing people have noted here by reading this thread! Likely she won't read it. But what if she did? A wounded spirit cannot be hardly borne.

I agree with this. In my opinion, going public with an interview about their engagement was probably not the wisest thing to do. We can pray for them that they will be able to weather the many storms that they will face.

[canam]

Have you googled her name? (I'm not suggesting you do, but I did.) I was afraid to click on one. single. link. I also deleted the search from my history, considering the sorts of results that came up. Considering her notoriety, I imagine SOME sort of statement was deemed necessary, although I would have still kept the whole thing as private as possible. I wasn't asked, though.... ;)

Maybe the article was a feeble attempt to change the *narrative* about who this woman is. That will be difficult to do, to say the least. And there was the woman at the well....

I did the google thing too ,like you said everything is triple ex she has so many films in her credits I didn't count, this is the hardest core of hard core lesbianism on down, i cant imagine what kind of a relationship they could have, it seems to me he at least ,is an attention freak cause as you can see everywhere they go, all eyes are going to be on them at conference whatever, I mean she just cant hide ,it will be a miracle if this works btw 400 to their wedding ?holy smokes what a show that will be all her co stars ? unimaginable !!.I too think they should have kept her film name private, but I suppose given her looks and given name people are going to search until they find her pic.

[Praxeas]

Yes we hope she does not go the way of Gomer.
Pyle?

[Praxeas]

Has anyone considered the soul of the young lady who might read these terrible comments posted about her and she gets discouraged and backslides? Who's hands will her blood be on?

I would take this whole thing down for her sake!
I haven't really seen any terrible comments. It's mostly been about the wisdom of marrying a new convert.

BTW THEY made this public and she has done PORN...how hard do you think it will be for her to hear the comments of men who saw her doing porn when she walks down the street?

I imagine someone like that must have a thick skin already.

[Praxeas]

Have you googled her name? (I'm not suggesting you do, but I did.) I was afraid to click on one. single. link. I also deleted the search from my history, considering the sorts of results that came up. Considering her notoriety, I imagine SOME sort of statement was deemed necessary, although I would have still kept the whole thing as private as possible. I wasn't asked, though.... ;)

Maybe the article was a feeble attempt to change the *narrative* about who this woman is. That will be difficult to do, to say the least. And there was the woman at the well....
Why do I need to google it? I don't understand

The fact is, we are discussing what they put out there into the public media.

[Praxeas]

We have to be very careful with this sort of thing. Imagine her reading this and losing her victory. She could go right back to the world and fulfil the very thing people have noted here by reading this thread! Likely she won't read it. But what if she did? A wounded spirit cannot be hardly borne.
What is she gonna read here that will cause that? That they should have dated longer?

What have you guys been reading here because Im not seeing any attacks on her

[Praxeas]

I'm also a bit disappointed in our collective cynicism about God's ability to take a very broken life and make something wonderful of it.
I don't see a collective cynicism...I have not seen anyone speculate about God's ability to do that. I haven't really seen any harsh posts

The conversation has really been about the wisdom of marrying a new convert and that man being so very very young

But if you want to introduce her past..let's talk about that. God can change her yes. However how many of us don't believe someone who comes to the Lord needs some growing and strengthening time?

How many of us also don't believe that some of us, due to our pasts, might need a little LONGER growing up and Strengthening time?

I'll be the first to admit that I probably needed longer than the average man before I jumped into a relationship with a woman.

I just don't see how that is a bad thing to admit? Nobody is discounting what God has or can do with this lady..Please show me

[Praxeas]

The title of this thread goes along with the article title, "A former Oswego porn actress falls in love with a preacher; they're getting married."

They provided the picture for the article (this is noted in the article).

If you skim the comments, the reporter stated that the paper heard of their engagement and she called them. They obviously agreed to an interview and openly shared of her past. Crystal linked to a similar article from her own facebook page.

It doesn't sound to me that she has any problem with her past being brought up or discussed.
Exactly!

[BINGO]

The title of this thread goes along with the article title, "A former Oswego porn actress falls in love with a preacher; they're getting married."

They provided the picture for the article (this is noted in the article).

If you skim the comments, the reporter stated that the paper heard of their engagement and she called them. They obviously agreed to an interview and openly shared of her past. Crystal linked to a similar article from her own facebook page.

It doesn't sound to me that she has any problem with her past being brought up or discussed.

This women sharing her past is no problem, but when you have a bunch of people throwing stones at her on a Christian Forum thats a different story!

[Praxeas]

This women sharing her past is no problem, but when you have a bunch of people throwing stones at her on a Christian Forum thats a different story!
I don't see that happening really

[n david]

This women sharing her past is no problem, but when you have a bunch of people throwing stones at her on a Christian Forum thats a different story!
My "stones" have been aimed at the young Pastor, not her. God bless her, I hope she's indeed repented and living a Godly life; on the other hand God help him, because he's put himself, and the church he Pastors, in a very bad and stupid situation.

That said, he's a grown man who made his decision. I hope he thought it out, I doubt it, but doesn't matter what I believe. He made the decision and has to live with the consequences.

[Praxeas]

I haven't really seen people ganging up on this woman...

[Abiding Now]

If the church wasn't involved and the fella wasn't a pastor of a church. IF you asked the average person the street, they would say the same thing, TOO QUICK.

[Aquila]

Gone are the days when preachers look for A B C and D in a potential preachers wife. Now they settle for X X and X :-)

lol

So not right. lol

[Aquila]

We have to be very careful with this sort of thing. Imagine her reading this and losing her victory. She could go right back to the world and fulfil the very thing people have noted here by reading this thread! Likely she won't read it. But what if she did? A wounded spirit cannot be hardly borne.

That's a good point. Personally, I do wish them well. I vote we all set some time aside today to say a special prayer for their marriage, bond of love, happiness, and for their ministry. Clearly this woman can be used mightily by God. Let's pray for them.

[Aquila]

I did the google thing too ,like you said everything is triple ex she has so many films in her credits I didn't count, this is the hardest core of hard core lesbianism on down, i cant imagine what kind of a relationship they could have, it seems to me he at least ,is an attention freak cause as you can see everywhere they go, all eyes are going to be on them at conference whatever, I mean she just cant hide ,it will be a miracle if this works btw 400 to their wedding ?holy smokes what a show that will be all her co stars ? unimaginable !!.I too think they should have kept her film name private, but I suppose given her looks and given name people are going to search until they find her pic.

It goes to show you... God can save anyone... and use them for His glory.

I'm reminded of a lady who was living with a man who wasn't her husband. Jesus met her at the well and used her to reach her entire community.

[StillStanding]

Unfortunately, for this church, the young pastor's wife's past might continue to haunt her. Some of their members could buy or rent DVDs to watch the pastor's wife doing all kinds of ungodly sexual acts.

It's one thing to have a bad past, but now you have a testimony of how God delivered you. It's another to have a past that won't ever go away. I feel sorry for the woman, because she made some horrible choices when she was younger that will continue to haunt her. I feel sad for the young preacher that is not using wisdom in how this relationship will effect his ministry.

[n david]

Unfortunately, for this church, the young pastor's wife's past might continue to haunt her. Some of their members could buy or rent DVDs to watch the pastor's wife doing all kinds of ungodly sexual acts.

It's one thing to have a bad past, but now you have a testimony of how God delivered you. It's another to have a past that won't ever go away. I feel sorry for the woman, because she made some horrible choices when she was younger that will continue to haunt her. I feel sad for the young preacher that is not using wisdom in how this relationship will effect his ministry.
Not to throw more stones, but per the article her last xxx-rated video was filmed just a few months ago in JUNE.

[good samaritan]

I am a fairly new at pastoring and in the short 1 and half years I have pastored I have recognized the stress on the pastors home. The church often times doesn't confront the pastor directly with issues; they often first go to his wife with problems. My wife's phone rings as much if not more than mine with church issues. Often the pastors wife is expected to be like and elder to the ladies in the church. I know that biblically there is nothing said of a pastors wife, but in today's church culture there is much respnsibility placed on her whether she likes it or not.

This young pastor must work doubly hard to protect his new wife from the tensions placed on a pastors family. I think that he overlooked logic in doing this, but if God is in it they will be fine. I personally think that unmarried people who are seeking to be married should wait for a pastorate until they have gotten their personal lives straight because it isn't ussually good for the church or their family introducing someone new into the picture.

This my opinion, but God sometimes defies logic and I hope this is a God thing.

[Steve Epley]

Not to throw more stones, but per the article her last xxx-rated video was filmed just a few months ago in JUNE.

This is so. That is the problem not the lack of forgiveness nor the wonder of a new life where old things are passed away and all things have become new, but the newness itself. The lack of judgment in going public with this to already shows someone is not thinking to clearly. God knows and forgives and forgets however humanity lacks that. I hope the best for them.

[StillStanding]

This is so. That is the problem not the lack of forgiveness nor the wonder of a new life where old things are passed away and all things have become new, but the newness itself. The lack of judgment in going public with this to already shows someone is not thinking to clearly. God knows and forgives and forgets however humanity lacks that. I hope the best for them.

:thumbsup I really hope the best for them too!

[mfblume]

This is so. That is the problem not the lack of forgiveness nor the wonder of a new life where old things are passed away and all things have become new, but the newness itself. The lack of judgment in going public with this to already shows someone is not thinking to clearly. God knows and forgives and forgets however humanity lacks that. I hope the best for them.

I agree.

[Steve Epley]

I agree.

This has to stop!!!!!!!!:heeheehee

[mfblume]

this has to stop!!!!!!!!:heeheehee


i agree! :D

[johnny44]

This has to stop!!!!!!!!:heeheeheeWow,Im shocked Bro. Epley has a sense of humor.

[houston]

Bassette said he loves that DiGregorio decided to change her life not for him, but for herself and for God.

aww

[johnny44]

Wow,Im shocked Bro. Epley has a sense of humor.Was just yoking.:yourock

[Steve Epley]

Was just yoking.:yourock

Elder Blume and myself having been fussing for years I hate it he is so wrong on so many issues:highfive but I have tried.:happydance
However one of the best articles I have read on the resurrection he wrote.

[mfblume]

Elder Blume and myself having been fussing for years I hate it he is so wrong on so many issues:highfive but I have tried.:happydance
However one of the best articles I have read on the resurrection he wrote.

You would like my book on Prophecy, called THY KINGDOM CAME, for a whole huge section of it is on the resurrection. And you might get the rest of your prophecy straightened out, too. ;)

Or see here:

http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com/showthread.php?t=47038

[Aquila]

Unfortunately, for this church, the young pastor's wife's past might continue to haunt her. Some of their members could buy or rent DVDs to watch the pastor's wife doing all kinds of ungodly sexual acts.

It's one thing to have a bad past, but now you have a testimony of how God delivered you. It's another to have a past that won't ever go away. I feel sorry for the woman, because she made some horrible choices when she was younger that will continue to haunt her. I feel sad for the young preacher that is not using wisdom in how this relationship will effect his ministry.

I fully understand your point about the young pastor not using wisdom.

However, as to her past coming back to haunt her... Yes, obviously she has done some wild and sinful things. But I think anyone who would look up that junk from her past to hold it against her is acting worse than she was in her past.

[Aquila]

Not to throw more stones, but per the article her last xxx-rated video was filmed just a few months ago in JUNE.

That would bother most men that I know. How long has this pastor known her or perhaps loved her?

[Aquila]

Not to throw more stones, but per the article her last xxx-rated video was filmed just a few months ago in JUNE.

Ever watch a commercial for a new car and think, "I have got to get one of those." lol

[Disciple4life]

I fully understand your point about the young pastor not using wisdom.

However, as to her past coming back to haunt her... Yes, obviously she has done some wild and sinful things. But I think anyone who would look up that junk from her past to hold it against her is acting worse than she was in her past.

Ha! HAA!! HAAA!!! You know what I have on sister so and so! I was watching a movie last night and you wouldn't believe that psp psp a!$0#@_?/ :heeheehee

[Aquila]

This is so. That is the problem not the lack of forgiveness nor the wonder of a new life where old things are passed away and all things have become new, but the newness itself. The lack of judgment in going public with this to already shows someone is not thinking to clearly. God knows and forgives and forgets however humanity lacks that. I hope the best for them.

:thumbsup

[Aquila]

Ha! HAA!! HAAA!!! You know what I have on sister so and so! I was watching a movie last night and you wouldn't believe that psp psp a!$0#@_?/ :heeheehee

LOL

Hey... at least as her husband he knows her capabilities. lol

[Steve Epley]

You would like my book on Prophecy, called THY KINGDOM CAME, for a whole huge section of it is on the resurrection. And you might get the rest of your prophecy straightened out, too. ;)

Or see here:

http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com/showthread.php?t=47038

Yikes.:thumbsup

[houston]

LOL

Hey... at least as her husband he knows her capabilities. lol

I googled her.

[StillStanding]

I fully understand your point about the young pastor not using wisdom.

However, as to her past coming back to haunt her... Yes, obviously she has done some wild and sinful things. But I think anyone who would look up that junk from her past to hold it against her is acting worse than she was in her past.

All a young teen boy will have to do is google and then fantasize about his pastor's wife! Surely the congregation will know about her past. Would the kid be a horrible person because he or she was curious?

[Jermyn Davidson]

I think they are moving too quickly.

I hope nothing but the best for them-- including a postponement of their marriage for at least another 365 days.

You know, they put this out in the public for public discussion...


smh

[canam]

I am a fairly new at pastoring and in the short 1 and half years I have pastored I have recognized the stress on the pastors home. The church often times doesn't confront the pastor directly with issues; they often first go to his wife with problems. My wife's phone rings as much if not more than mine with church issues. Often the pastors wife is expected to be like and elder to the ladies in the church. I know that biblically there is nothing said of a pastors wife, but in today's church culture there is much respnsibility placed on her whether she likes it or not.

This young pastor must work doubly hard to protect his new wife from the tensions placed on a pastors family. I think that he overlooked logic in doing this, but if God is in it they will be fine. I personally think that unmarried people who are seeking to be married should wait for a pastorate until they have gotten their personal lives straight because it isn't ussually good for the church or their family introducing someone new into the picture.

This my opinion, but God sometimes defies logic and I hope this is a God thing.
It depends on the pastor in my experience ,some pastors wives have there fingers in everything and the pastor discusses everything with her , and it gets yacked about at the supper table with the kids listening, which i think is very wrong imo, my current pastor ? just the opposite she has her activities in the church, but anything to do with advice goes to her husband and she is blissfully unaware of anything that is said, which i like very much !!

[Steve Epley]

All a young teen boy will have to do is google and then fantasize about his pastor's wife! Surely the congregation will know about her past. Would the kid be a horrible person because he or she was curious?

Surely you don't think this will happen?:heeheehee

[MissBrattified]

All a young teen boy will have to do is google and then fantasize about his pastor's wife! Surely the congregation will know about her past. Would the kid be a horrible person because he or she was curious?

Sigh. What does this scenario really have to do with anything? I agree with others that the relationship has potential issues and that it's moving very quickly and that it may very well be terribly mismatched (and it also could work out beautifully and become a great testament to God's power to revolutionize a life and use it to His glory). However, that does NOT mean her past should be used against her or that it excuses any man (young or old) from sin. :blink

I personally know a minister whose wife was a "lady of the night" in her pre-Christ life. What about that? Obviously the age of the WWW has made this a much more complicated matter, but still...reputation has to start at conversion, IMO. Not before, or everyone but those raised in a pew would be doomed to never be in leadership. (And that would be a crying shame.)

I'm sure the public statement was an attempt to address all the *publicity* that's already out there; not to give other Christians carte blanche to weigh in on this couple's personal decisions.

[Praxeas]

Sigh. What does this scenario really have to do with anything? I agree with others that the relationship has potential issues and that it's moving very quickly and that it may very well be terribly mismatched (and it also could work out beautifully and become a great testament to God's power to revolutionize a life and use it to His glory). However, that does NOT mean her past should be used against her or that it excuses any man (young or old) from sin. :blink

I personally know a minister whose wife was a "lady of the night" in her pre-Christ life. What about that? Obviously the age of the WWW has made this a much more complicated matter, but still...reputation has to start at conversion, IMO. Not before, or everyone but those raised in a pew would be doomed to never be in leadership. (And that would be a crying shame.)

I'm sure the public statement was an attempt to address all the *publicity* that's already out there; not to give other Christians carte blanche to weigh in on this couple's personal decisions.
If a boy is inclined to do that, so are the grown men and they would be inclined to do it irregardless of this woman's past then

"The average age, she said, at which children first view pornography is 11, and 93 percent of boys and 91 percent of girls have viewed porn before they are 18. This is important because viewing porn is highly addictive. It shuts down the prefrontal cortex of the brain and alters brain development in kids who watch it. After that, true intimacy with a partner becomes more difficult. With the technological advances of smartphones, one-third of teenagers now carry the equivalent of X-rated theaters in their pockets, Hughes added."

http://www.christianpost.com/news/internet-porn-pandemic-threatens-world-and-church-apologetics-conference-highlights-128199/

[good samaritan]

It depends on the pastor in my experience ,some pastors wives have tpastorehere fingers in everything and the pastor discusses everything with her , and it gets yacked about at the supper table with the kids listening, which i think is very wrong imo, my current pastor ? just the opposite she has her activities in the church, but anything to do with advice goes to her husband and she is blissfully unaware of anything that is said, which i like very much !!

I have found that many times like it or not the pastors wife is drug into things (if not her husband then the church). pastors wives are going to hear things of course it is not a matter of if. I believe that pastors wife's way of handling things differs and may make you believe she is uninformed. There is not a married couple alive who don't set down and talk about their stresses and the pastors stresses are ussually in the church (I agree that the supper table and in front of the kids is not the place).
In counseling for my personal protection I would never counsel a woman or child without my wife present. That being said she is going to get inside information. The question is would you want a babe in the Lord that has only been part for a few months to be this involved in church leadership work. Maybe in a larger church their is a pastoral staff that is involved in counseling where their is less need for the pastors wife's involvement.

I am thankful for my wife and have seen her targeted for criticism for just being my wife. I don't think that the pastors wife is a church position, but I know pastors who have suffered divorce because of the stresses of church leadership. Some may say they must have not been called in the first place, but who knows. Pastors and their families endure much stress. Most people think pastors are lazy and if they gain any financially their is going to be someone going to say they are somehow mishandleing church finances.

Is this really the enviroment for a newly born again child of God.

[good samaritan]

Marriage is the second most important decision a person will make their whole life. I have searched scriptures and have found no place where permission is given to re-marry. If it doesn't work the first time I wouldn't have peace to do it again. I don't say this to condemn anyone, but only that this should be weighed in the ballances before making a marriage decision.

[n david]

Sigh. What does this scenario really have to do with anything? I agree with others that the relationship has potential issues and that it's moving very quickly and that it may very well be terribly mismatched (and it also could work out beautifully and become a great testament to God's power to revolutionize a life and use it to His glory). However, that does NOT mean her past should be used against her or that it excuses any man (young or old) from sin. :blink
:blink What does a boy or young man hearing about his Pastor's wife being an x-rated porn "actress," then googling to see if it's true have to do with anything? Quite a bit, actually. It doesn't excuse from sin, but it does create a stumblingblock for anyone in that church who has issues with sins of the flesh.

I personally know a minister whose wife was a "lady of the night" in her pre-Christ life. What about that? Obviously the age of the WWW has made this a much more complicated matter, but still...reputation has to start at conversion, IMO. Not before, or everyone but those raised in a pew would be doomed to never be in leadership. (And that would be a crying shame.)
Was this minister's wife a popular x-rated porn "actress?" There's a huge difference between being a behind closed doors prostitute and an internet and video porn star.

It would be nice if reputation started at conversion, but that's not how it is, especially in this digital age and with respect to the position of Pastor and wife.

I agree with a few commentary's, specifically Matthew Henry's, which address this issue of reputation:

The families of ministers ought to be examples of good to all other families. We should take heed of pride; it is a sin that turned angels into devils. He must be of good repute among his neighbours, and under no reproach from his former life.

There's a reason Paul laid out the standards to which ministers and Pastors should be held. He knew personally how actions committed pre-conversion can cast a stain and blot on the ministry.

I'm sure the public statement was an attempt to address all the *publicity* that's already out there; not to give other Christians carte blanche to weigh in on this couple's personal decisions.
It's speculation, because we don't know why. If the speculation is correct, it failed terribly. You don't address neighborhood, word of mouth gossip by broadcasting the story via an interview with a newspaper which is accessible online. Then again, I wouldn't expect this young Pastor, who met and got engaged to marry a porn star a few months after her last x-rated video, to understand that.

[Steve Epley]

:blink What does a boy or young man hearing about his Pastor's wife being an x-rated porn "actress," then googling to see if it's true have to do with anything? Quite a bit, actually. It doesn't excuse from sin, but it does create a stumblingblock for anyone in that church who has issues with sins of the flesh.


Was this minister's wife a popular x-rated porn "actress?" There's a huge difference between being a behind closed doors prostitute and an internet and video porn star.

It would be nice if reputation started at conversion, but that's not how it is, especially in this digital age and with respect to the position of Pastor and wife.

I agree with a few commentary's, specifically Matthew Henry's, which address this issue of reputation:



There's a reason Paul laid out the standards to which ministers and Pastors should be held. He knew personally how actions committed pre-conversion can cast a stain and blot on the ministry.


It's speculation, because we don't know why. If the speculation is correct, it failed terribly. You don't address neighborhood, word of mouth gossip by broadcasting the story via an interview with a newspaper which is accessible online. Then again, I wouldn't expect this young Pastor, who met and got engaged to marry a porn star a few months after her last x-rated video, to understand that.

Spot on.

[Abiding Now]

In today's environment with divorce at about 50 percent, to me, this marriage has trouble and divorce written all over it.

[Aquila]

I googled her.

I think a lot of people have, even if they're unwilling to admit it. lol

[Aquila]

All a young teen boy will have to do is google and then fantasize about his pastor's wife! Surely the congregation will know about her past. Would the kid be a horrible person because he or she was curious?

Eh, boys will be boys...

A pastor's wife being a porn star or not, such a boy wouldn't be the first boy to fantasize about a pastor's wife.

Also, everyone gets curious. Even my fiancé Googled this lady. It doesn't make them horrible people. We're all human and most of us have the same human interests, curiosities, and interests. However, while curiosity is nearly universal and relatively harmless most of the time... we should allow the Spirit to lead and guide us. If the Spirit bids us NOT to look into something, we do well to heed His leading.

[Aquila]

If a boy is inclined to do that, so are the grown men and they would be inclined to do it irregardless of this woman's past then

"The average age, she said, at which children first view pornography is 11, and 93 percent of boys and 91 percent of girls have viewed porn before they are 18. This is important because viewing porn is highly addictive. It shuts down the prefrontal cortex of the brain and alters brain development in kids who watch it. After that, true intimacy with a partner becomes more difficult. With the technological advances of smartphones, one-third of teenagers now carry the equivalent of X-rated theaters in their pockets, Hughes added."

http://www.christianpost.com/news/internet-porn-pandemic-threatens-world-and-church-apologetics-conference-highlights-128199/

These are truly trying times in which our souls have been seriously vexed. Those numbers no doubt represent those of us on this forum too. Who of us haven't been touched by our X-rated society in some manner? A sad testimony to the decadence of our society.

[Aquila]

Marriage is the second most important decision a person will make their whole life. I have searched scriptures and have found no place where permission is given to re-marry. If it doesn't work the first time I wouldn't have peace to do it again. I don't say this to condemn anyone, but only that this should be weighed in the ballances before making a marriage decision.

Very good point.

[Aquila]

In today's environment with divorce at about 50 percent, to me, this marriage has trouble and divorce written all over it.

Sadly, you're right.

:(

[StillStanding]

Apparently, this young man is not capable of separating from his emotions and seeing the big picture. It seems that everyone else sees the future train wreck except him! I pray that wisdom prevails for the good of this young man, but just as importantly, for the good of the local congregation.

[revrandy]

This will end in tragedy... remember this...

[ILG]

He can marry her if he wants......but I wouldn't recommend it.

[Reader]

His license may be in jeopardy as she was previously married in 2007. Unless it was for adultery from the ex, UPC regulations claim he shouldn't hold license.

[Steve Epley]

His license may be in jeopardy as she was previously married in 2007. Unless it was for adultery from the ex, UPC regulations claim he shouldn't hold license.

I think since her marriage was pre conversion it wouldn't matter?

[mfblume]

I think since her marriage was pre conversion it wouldn't matter?

That's correct.

[Reader]

Incorrect. It is based upon what HE does after conversion and not her, as he is the minister.

Section 8. Marriage and Divorce—Innocent Party.

1. Inasmuch as the ministry is the highest office on earth, no person shall be
eligible as a minister if after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said
person has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the
part of the one from whom he or she has been divorced, and has remarried; or
after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said person has married a person
who has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the part
of the one from who he or she has been divorced. Further, if fornication or
adultery is claimed as the grounds of divorce, sufficient evidence other than
his or her own personal testimony must be presented to the District Board.

[bishoph]

Incorrect. It is based upon what HE does after conversion and not her, as he is the minister.

Section 8. Marriage and Divorce—Innocent Party.

1. Inasmuch as the ministry is the highest office on earth, no person shall be
eligible as a minister if after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said
person has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the
part of the one from whom he or she has been divorced, and has remarried; or
after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said person has married a person
who has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the part
of the one from who he or she has been divorced. Further, if fornication or
adultery is claimed as the grounds of divorce, sufficient evidence other than
his or her own personal testimony must be presented to the District Board.

This is talking about people who are divorced IN the church......her divorce would be exempt because it was pre-conversion.

[Steve Epley]

Incorrect. It is based upon what HE does after conversion and not her, as he is the minister.

Section 8. Marriage and Divorce—Innocent Party.

1. Inasmuch as the ministry is the highest office on earth, no person shall be
eligible as a minister if after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said
person has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the
part of the one from whom he or she has been divorced, and has remarried; or
after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said person has married a person
who has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the part
of the one from who he or she has been divorced. Further, if fornication or
adultery is claimed as the grounds of divorce, sufficient evidence other than
his or her own personal testimony must be presented to the District Board.

I think it would also apply to her? Each district makes the judgment. The problem I could foresee is the situation itself rather than her previous marriage. However knowing organizational politics they could use this for a scapegoat but normally it wouldn't be a problem.

[Reader]

This is talking about people who are divorced IN the church......her divorce would be exempt because it was pre-conversion.

That isn't what it states. It is not so much about her but HIM- he is marrying post-conversion. It doesn't say it is permissible if the other party was divorced pre-conversion. It stipulates post-conversion in regard to the minister but nowhere is that found in regard to the other party.

"or after having been filled with the Holy Ghost said person has married a person who has been divorced for any cause save fornication or adultery on the part of the one from who he or she has been divorced."

[Reader]

If one dismisses that aspect, consider then the following from the same section.

"The responsibility of the District Board in all cases shall be as follows:
(a) The District Board must determine whether or not the party involved
has lived a life of integrity and has conducted himself or herself above
reproach, both before and after the time of the divorce.
(b) The District Board must remember always that the Bible gives as the only
grounds for divorcement and remarriage, adultery or fornication (Matthew
5:32; 19:9)."

(A) could be particularly troubling, considering a porn movie was made in June, when in March she turned around and she continues to use her adult film name on her current Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/nadia.hilton.7315 (Safe to view)

[Steve Epley]

If one dismisses that aspect, consider then the following from the same section.

"The responsibility of the District Board in all cases shall be as follows:
(a) The District Board must determine whether or not the party involved
has lived a life of integrity and has conducted himself or herself above
reproach, both before and after the time of the divorce.
(b) The District Board must remember always that the Bible gives as the only
grounds for divorcement and remarriage, adultery or fornication (Matthew
5:32; 19:9)."

(A) could be particularly troubling, considering a porn movie was made in June, when in March she turned around and she continues to use her adult film name on her current Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/nadia.hilton.7315 (Safe to view)

I would say the district will probably balk on the issue. Is he licensed?

[Reader]

Yes, he holds license with the UPC. His father does as well and is a presbyter for the district. He is pastor of three churches, yet it seems David is a pastor at the Fulton church.

[Steve Epley]

Yes, he holds license with the UPC. His father does as well and is a presbyter for the district. He is pastor of three churches, yet it seems David is a pastor at the Fulton church.

Now that changes the dynamics his Dad is presbyter he ain't going to have any problems unless his Dad is against it.

[Reader]

You believe politics changes the rules then?

[bishoph]

If one dismisses that aspect, consider then the following from the same section.

"The responsibility of the District Board in all cases shall be as follows:
(a) The District Board must determine whether or not the party involved
has lived a life of integrity and has conducted himself or herself above
reproach, both before and after the time of the divorce.
(b) The District Board must remember always that the Bible gives as the only
grounds for divorcement and remarriage, adultery or fornication (Matthew
5:32; 19:9)."

(A) could be particularly troubling, considering a porn movie was made in June, when in March she turned around and she continues to use her adult film name on her current Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/nadia.hilton.7315 (Safe to view)

I realize this is in the manuel and does not specify pre/post conversion, but I will assure you there is not a DB on the planet that is going to start looking at one's past....... prior to salvation with regard to this issue. To do so would disqualify MANY ministers currently serving faithfully and with integrity. The purpose of this section of the manuel is assuming both parties are saved but have been divorced. (Kind of like what many teach about the epistles NOT being for the world but for those who are already saved......and NO I am NOT placing the manuel on the level of the Bible.....just comparing like concepts)

[Reader]

Then the manual doesn't mean what it declares.

Let us then look at it from a post-conversion view. A porn movie is made afterward. The adult film name is used afterward to the present day. That does not come into play?

[Praxeas]

Then the manual doesn't mean what it declares.

Let us then look at it from a post-conversion view. A porn movie is made afterward. The adult film name is used afterward to the present day. That does not come into play?
She isn't applying for a license is she? This rule covers those who have license...post conversion (Since it would be asinine to consider licensing an unbeliever)

[Reader]

Prax, I am reading the UPC Manual and quoting from it. I made it clear that the rule is about what the minister does post-conversion.

[Reader]

In other words, how does the UPC manual come into play in this situation?

It stipulates that a minister who is seeking to marry a divorced person must meet with the board. "5. Currently Licensed Minister. If a minister desires to marry a person who is divorced he or she shall meet the District Board."

Previously I quoted what the board must consider.

How does any of this pertain to the situation before us? Some say it doesn't and I wonder how it does. My focus is on how the marriage may affect HIS license. Epley seems to believe he will get a free pass as dad is on the board. Bishop seems to believe none of it matters as it was pre-conversion on her part. My concern is the manual states post-conversion on his part.

If nothing matters, why does it say a minister in his position must meet with the board?

[StillStanding]

In other words, how does the UPC manual come into play in this situation?

It stipulates that a minister who is seeking to marry a divorced person must meet with the board. "5. Currently Licensed Minister. If a minister desires to marry a person who is divorced he or she shall meet the District Board."

Previously I quoted what the board must consider.

How does any of this pertain to the situation before us? Some say it doesn't and I wonder how it does. My focus is on how the marriage may affect HIS license. Epley seems to believe he will get a free pass as dad is on the board. Bishop seems to believe none of it matters as it was pre-conversion on her part. My concern is the manual states post-conversion on his part.

If nothing matters, why does it say a minister in his position must meet with the board?

Yep! This rule obviously was put in to prevent embarrassment to the district. It would be germane in this particular case.

[Steve Epley]

Yep! This rule obviously was put in to prevent embarrassment to the district. It would be germane in this particular case.

I imagine the district may already be slightly embarrassed with all the media coverage??

[Jay]

Depending on his father's influence, he may be able to survive a hearing of the DB, but that brings politics into play, but that must be factored. I am concerned about the way this was handled.

[StillStanding]

I imagine the district may already be slightly embarrassed with all the media coverage??

:nod

[canam]

I imagine the district may already be slightly embarrassed with all the media coverage??

Depends, this may be one of those small town "type" gossip/enquirer papers that barely anyone reads and its online only or a lower tier paper in large area like syracuse a multi paper town perhaps ,99 percent of ap 's will never hear of this ,i went to a nice sounthern church one time at the height of the upc /wpf thing and they knew nothing about it ,lot of people dont read a paper regular ,they may scan the front page online occassionaly but thats it, 99 percent have never heard of this site and never will and if they did, wouldnt bother to visit !

[Jay]

Depends, this may be one of those small town "type" gossip/enquirer papers that barely anyone reads and its online only or a lower tier paper in large area like syracuse a multi paper town perhaps ,99 percent of ap 's will never hear of this ,i went to a nice sounthern church one time at the height of the upc /wpf thing and they knew nothing about it ,lot of people dont read a paper regular ,they may scan the front page online occassionaly but thats it, 99 percent have never heard of this site and never will and if they did, wouldnt bother to visit !

I do not recall that concerning the UPCI split made any major articles, and in fact barely budged either the Forward or the Pentecostal Herald. I believe that this was done in part by both sides to keep all such information inhouse so to speak, which assists in not poisoning the well or causing needless damage to the saints.

[revrandy]

Nothing will happen... the quality of men in the UPC is growing worse year after year...and nothing is said... Character, Pride, Politics, and the willingness to cover everything up... it is the way org's seem to go... I was UPC for years... and while I believed in the Org it was the acceptance of ungodly men in leadership that I came to the conclusion that enough was enough... and nobody really cares anymore... it is sad...

[Reader]

Depends, this may be one of those small town "type" gossip/enquirer papers that barely anyone reads

It appears that a number of others also picked up the story.

and nobody really cares anymore...

Why do you believe no one cares anymore?

I imagine the district may already be slightly embarrassed with all the media coverage??

I would be. If circumstances were much different, my thoughts on it would change.

[CC1]

Nothing will happen... the quality of men in the UPC is growing worse year after year...and nothing is said... Character, Pride, Politics, and the willingness to cover everything up... it is the way org's seem to go... I was UPC for years... and while I believed in the Org it was the acceptance of ungodly men in leadership that I came to the conclusion that enough was enough... and nobody really cares anymore... it is sad...

RevRandy,

I can't remember if I already know this or not but are you now part of the World Wide Wrestling Pentecostal Fellowship, GIB, or something else?

[MawMaw]

RevRandy,

I can't remember if I already know this or not but are you now part of the World Wide Wrestling Pentecostal Fellowship, GIB, or something else?

Aren't you tired of that old joke by now!? :foottap

Actually the title is Worldwide (1 word not 2) Pentecostal Fellowship,
WPF. :nod

[Jermyn Davidson]

Aren't you tired of that old joke by now!? :foottap

Actually the title is Worldwide (1 word not 2) Pentecostal Fellowship,
WPF. :nod

Actually,
I thought his joke was a bit funny.

It brought to mind a picture of a young man in a white shirt with a tie standing on top ropes of a wrestling ring, about to slam a wooden chair across the back of another guy in a white shirt and tie.

But don't mind me.
I prayed for Putin to die just earlier today.

[aegsm76]

Nothing will happen... the quality of men in the UPC is growing worse year after year...and nothing is said... Character, Pride, Politics, and the willingness to cover everything up... it is the way org's seem to go... I was UPC for years... and while I believed in the Org it was the acceptance of ungodly men in leadership that I came to the conclusion that enough was enough... and nobody really cares anymore... it is sad...

There are still some good men left.
And there are still some good men that care.
Sadly, there are some who are not and don't care.

[CC1]

Aren't you tired of that old joke by now!? :foottap

Actually the title is Worldwide (1 word not 2) Pentecostal Fellowship,
WPF. :nod

Obviously not!:happydance

[MawMaw]

Obviously not!:happydance

:hmmm

[StillStanding]

Well.....what's the verdict? Heaven or Hell?

[Steve Epley]

I probably shouldn't ask this but I thought it(probably not the only one) you reckon he has seen any of those films?

[BrotherEastman]

I probably shouldn't ask this but I thought it(probably not the only one) you reckon he has seen any of those films?

Brother Epley I like you but I think you are groping in a judgmental way. lol

[Abiding Now]

One day, out there in the dark future, a young man may very well be viewing "Mom's video". :ouch

[BrotherEastman]

One day, out there in the dark future, a young man may very well be viewing "Mom's video". :ouch

That's disgusting!!!!

[Abiding Now]

That's disgusting!!!!

Sure it is, but when a person (pastor/hubby) oks and supports a degraded lifestyle, "disgusting" things are bound to happen.

[Aquila]

I probably shouldn't ask this but I thought it(probably not the only one) you reckon he has seen any of those films?

I'd assume so. Or maybe he doesn't want to see them.

[Aquila]

I've looked up his Facebook page... he doesn't seem like he's a very serious minister. I get the feeling that he's trying to get fired from his post or something. I get the feeling that it's like a temper tantrum or sensational stunt to cause a ruckus and ruffle feathers.

[Reader]

I've looked up his Facebook page... he doesn't seem like he's a very serious minister. I get the feeling that he's trying to get fired from his post or something. I get the feeling that it's like a temper tantrum or sensational stunt to cause a ruckus and ruffle feathers.

He's only 23, so no he isn't real serious yet. He's still pretty much a kid with all the selfies, writing about running a red light and not paying his property taxes ($6,000-$7,000) and baiting someone with posting pictures of him and her together. Condiering this, it is no wonder he thought it appropriate to broadcast this other to the press. Unwise in all those things! https://www.facebook.com/david.bassette.3

[n david]

I probably shouldn't ask this but I thought it(probably not the only one) you reckon he has seen any of those films?
Would not be surprised.

I've heard stats before about the number of churchgoing men who watch porn, but it was a couple years ago, and the numbers (while high) weren't nearly as high as the number in the video below.

And the number of PASTORS who admit to regularly watching porn is incredibly sad and shocking to me.

http://youtu.be/_SfrZl73tpk

[Reader]

David, if that is true, it is sad.

[Steve Epley]

I was not meaning to be unkind just pondering?

[BrotherEastman]

Would not be surprised.

I've heard stats before about the number of churchgoing men who watch porn, but it was a couple years ago, and the numbers (while high) weren't nearly as high as the number in the video below.

And the number of PASTORS who admit to regularly watching porn is incredibly sad and shocking to me.

http://youtu.be/_SfrZl73tpk

Where did he get those figures? Seems kinda high for preachers.

[n david]

Where did he get those figures? Seems kinda high for preachers.
I thought so, too. He mentioned it came from Pure Desire Ministries.

Source Link (http://www.puredesire.org/what-is-pure-desire/)
Scroll to bottom of page

The Statistics Are Staggering:

66% of Internet-using men between the ages of 18-34 look at online porn at least once a month (1)

55% of pastors admitted to participating with porn online. (2)

Over 40% of women on line are involved in problematic cyber behavior. (3)

The largest consumer of Internet pornography is the 12 to 17 year old age group. (4)

70% of Internet porn traffic occurs during the 9 am to 5 pm workday. (5)

Two out of three companies have disciplined employees for misusing the Net at work and pornography topped the list of abuses (6)


References:..
(1) Psychology Today September/October 2005, pg.84 (source comSource)...
(2) Survey conducted by Pastors.com April 23, 2002...
(3) Counselor June 2006, pg. 34 "Women and Sex Addiction" by Dr. Patrick J. Carnes ...
(4) CBS News: The Passionate Eye -"O.com. Cybersex Addiction" Aired Monday Feb 7,2005 at 9 pm on CBC-TV...
(6) Saratoga Institute, 1999. http//www.pwcservices.com

..

[Aquila]

Would not be surprised.

I've heard stats before about the number of churchgoing men who watch porn, but it was a couple years ago, and the numbers (while high) weren't nearly as high as the number in the video below.

And the number of PASTORS who admit to regularly watching porn is incredibly sad and shocking to me.

http://youtu.be/_SfrZl73tpk

I used to work for LexisNexis and I did some computer support work on the side. At the time I had been asked to fix a number of computers belonging to various upstanding elders of the church, including a couple local pastors. I have to say... there wasn't a single computer belonging to a man wherein I didn't find a history of this stuff. I was discrete. I never mentioned any history I had discovered unless I had to in order to describe the problem and advise more advance technical support. Most were quiet and a little embarrassed. However, one blamed it all on his teenage son. When servicing computers used by ladies... I can say that I never saw any of this stuff in the PCs history. Food sites, news, inspirational story sites, sites relating to kids (games and activities), access to some magazines like Women's World, Cottage Living, Good Housekeeping, Cosmo, etc. Some had links or had accessed various lingerie sites (like Victoria's Secret). But most likely, it was to purchase clothing.

Most of the men I know, including myself, have been somehow affected by the adult entertainment industry.

I just want to say, human being to human being here, man to man, brother to brother... If you're struggling in this area, or have struggled with this in the past, you're not alone and it will pass. I'd also like to say that if you've had any struggles with this, and you need to have someone look at your computer... go outside of the church or have a mature and discrete brother look at it. An immature brother or sister could destroy your reputation or your ministry before you have a chance to get this part of your life cleaned up and under the blood. Even if it was a long time ago, it's still there on your PC. Anything hidden can come to light. So, be honest with God and yourself... and chose to protect yourself from allowing your private life and struggles to become public knowledge. I've seen good men torn down over a passing personal trial or struggle. Turn to God, get your life cleaned up with Jesus' help, and use some common sense.

[n david]

What many don't realize is that clearing the history and deleting cookies and cache of their internet browser doesn't truly erase what they've viewed online. It gets into the Registry and other internal system files.

I stayed with a family many years ago, who pastored a small church somewhere between California and North Carolina. During one stay, I was asked if I could help fix their PC. The Pastor said it was slow and there may be a virus or something wrong with it.

After working on that PC, I won't work on or use anyone else's computer.

It was filled with gay porn. I was sick, almost literally physically sick from the filth. And it appeared there wasn't even an attempt to hide it, as the internet history was filled with dozens of different gay porn websites.

[Sean]

Any besetting sin, including porn, must be dealt with immediately. Folks in this bondage will be lost. Grace does not cover this stuff. If we fall into sin, we fall back under the Law, to be judged by it....

1 John 3:4 Whosoever committeth sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law.(present tense)

5 And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin.

6 Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him.

7 Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous.

8 He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.

9 Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.

10 In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.

[houston]

The only one who could ever reach me
Was the son of a preacher man
The only boy who could ever teach me
Was the son of a preacher man
Yes he was, he was
Ooh, yes he was

[Aquila]

What many don't realize is that clearing the history and deleting cookies and cache of their internet browser doesn't truly erase what they've viewed online. It gets into the Registry and other internal system files.

I stayed with a family many years ago, who pastored a small church somewhere between California and North Carolina. During one stay, I was asked if I could help fix their PC. The Pastor said it was slow and there may be a virus or something wrong with it.

After working on that PC, I won't work on or use anyone else's computer.

It was filled with gay porn. I was sick, almost literally physically sick from the filth. And it appeared there wasn't even an attempt to hide it, as the internet history was filled with dozens of different gay porn websites.

Wow. Did you talk to this pastor about what was on his PC?

[n david]

Wow. Did you talk to this pastor about what was on his PC?
No. I was in my early 20s and was too afraid both to confront him personally or tell anyone else about it. Last I heard, several years ago, he doesn't pastor anymore.

[Aquila]

No. I was in my early 20s and was too afraid both to confront him personally or tell anyone else about it. Last I heard, several years ago, he doesn't pastor anymore.

Understandable. While I'm merciful and understanding towards gays and nearly every human condition... what you described would really trouble me. Sure, if I found some images of swimsuits, busty babes, Playboy Bunnies, or images of "normal" (I use the term loosely here) activities between male and female... as a man I'd partly understand, sympathize, and be in prayer for him. But something like gay porn...? Sorry... I couldn't handle that.

[StillStanding]

http://media2.giphy.com/media/37Ez5CZ8P0jSM/giphy.gif

[Dante]

I wonder if they are going to film their honeymoon and then post it to LiveLeak.

[Esaias]

23 yr old PASTOR?

And met an ex porn star by being invited to a CARD game... by a FEMALE...

Is this the new normal in the UPCI?

[Esaias]

I just read numerous pages if this thread. People, the issue isn't the woman. It's the "pastor".

The fact everybody is all focused on the woman shows WHY this type of event happened.

[Steve Epley]

I just read numerous pages if this thread. People, the issue isn't the woman. It's the "pastor".

The fact everybody is all focused on the woman shows WHY this type of event happened.

This is true. Really it says much about him sadly.