Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Little Johnny

A teacher in New York asked her 6th grade class
how many of them were Obama fans. Not really
knowing what an Obama fan was, but wanting to
be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their
hands except for Little Johnny. The teacher asked
Little Johnny why he decided to be Different...
again. Little Johnny said, 'Because I'm not
an Obama fan.' The teacher said, 'Why aren't
you an Obama fan?'Johnny said,'Because I'm a conservative. '
The teacher asked why he's a conservative. Little
Johnny answered,'Well, My Mom's a conservative and
my Dad's a conservative, so I'm a conservative. '
The teacher asks, 'If your Mom was a moron and your
Dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'
With a big smile, Little Johnny replied,
'That would make me an Obama fan.'

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Love it!

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Nasty Nancy Pelosi (I appologize for cussing) went to see the pope.

They walked out on the balconey together and Nancy said to the pope
I can give speaches that just make people go crazy.

The pope replied, I can make people go insane with joy with just the wave of my hand.

Nancy said "Prove it"

The pope reaches up and slaps Nancy across the face....

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Forwarded the Pelosi joke to Handsome. He is still laughing.


The Indian and His Buffalo

An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun
in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other.
He says to the waiter:

'Want coffee.'

The waiter says, 'Sure, Chief. Coming right up.'

He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee
The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp,
turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun,
causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere
and then just walks out.

The next morning the Indian returns.
He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling
another male buffalo with the other.
He walks up to the counter and says to
the waiter

'Want coffee..'

The waiter says 'Whoa, Tonto!
We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday.
What was all that about, anyway?'

The Indian smiles and proudly says ...

'Training for position in United States Congress:
Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull,
leave mess for others to clean up,
disappear for rest of day.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

:ursofunny:ursofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

:ursofunny :ursofunny :ursofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

:ursofunny:ursofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Fantasizing about drowning her, now joking about violence against women. Do you think it's funny to joke about slapping a lady across the face? Hmmmm..........

You must really struggle with I Timothy 2:2, don't you?

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

It was funny! :toofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

No laughter from the Gentleman's Corner.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Well, my husband didn't laugh either when I read it to him. :toofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

LadyRev did! LOL!

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

:ursofunny:ursofunny:ursofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

He's a good man! I think I'll just start another thread so I don't hijack this one, but......

I'll admit that maybe I'm too careful and too sensitive. But I'd much rather make the mistake on the side of sensitivity than insensitivity. Why risk offending? What could possibly be funny about a man slapping a lady in the face? I can't possibly understand that.

I saw some people here on the forum making fun and laughing at the "special short bus." Well that dug a little deep for me for specific reasons that are very close to me. And it indicates the way that we, as a society, are dismissive of people with special needs, and for me, there's no greater offense than to laugh at something that we, as WHOLE people, should be caring for with all our heart.

I remember as a child that I would joke with my sister about people that were mentally handicapped. I didn't know any better. I have sorrowfully and tearfully begged God for forgiveness many times and it's honestly been hard for me to shake. I'm choking up as I type this.

I just think we should think long and hard before we laugh AT someone. For, "inasmuch as you have done it unto the least of these, my brethren, you have done it unto Me."

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

oh, boy....:smack

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

I don't believe in slapping ladies either but we're not talking about a lady..:thumbsup

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

And that's EXACTLY the response I knew eventually would show up and the reason I called her a "lady" rather than a "woman."

I'm sure every spouse abuser would say the same thing.

Wow.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Do you really think she's a lady...ladies I know don't push abortion. Why wouldn't a Christian laugh at a joke but defend an abortionist?
:crazy

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Who's defending an abortionist?

Look up the word "Lady" in any online dictionary. Nancy Pelosi falls into several of those categories.

But aside from that.....is it for you to decide whether or not she's a lady? I would dare say that many people close to her feel like she's a lady and if that's the case, you should respect that.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

You are kidding right? I'm not even believing that!!! :toofunny

Just yanking your chain notofworks! :toofunny :bliss

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Bro, you need to get a life and get some time away from your computer. :blah :blah :blah

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

My good friend, if you knew why I was on the computer so much the last few days, you probably wouldn't say that.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

The thread you are referencing is titled, "Ferd, A Little Humor For You". I am aware that you are familiar with Ferd's sense of humor. With that being the case, one wonders why you would open the thread?

You COULD have chosen to ignore it, you made that choice knowing Ferd's humor and more than likely knowing what type of joke you would find there? It does make one pause and wonder if maybe you were looking for something to be offended by, in order to start another verbal sparring?

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

a lady no. your point?

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

indian asks cowboy if he can go for a ride in his shiny new convertible cowboy says climb in, they are going down the road, cowboy is going faster and faster, indian says slow down , cowboy says, no, no faster ya go cooler ya get faster ya go cooler ya get. he brings him back drops him off, indian jumps on his horse puts the boots right to the old horse, going accross the fields saying ,faster ya go cooler ya get, faster ya go cooler ya get ,finally the horse drops. indian jumps off, looks at the horse goes .hmm just as i thought froze to death !

Threadjack Alert
 

Ok, brother. So you told me your story. What I'm trying to tell you in love, is that your behavior is much more offensive than a simple joke. You come here not humbly or seeking fellowship, but angry and on a high horse; finding fault with everything trivial, only wishing to debate and monopolize real people. I may be able to understand your need to occupy your time, but I think your methods leave much room for improvement. As I told you last night in pm that many people come to these forums under many usernames, claiming many things. What you don't know, is that becuase I work in the criminal justice system I have seen far too many false claims for any story of hardship to have an affect on my opinion.

I don't know a thing about you, but I will continue to pray for your needs. I have placed you on my ignore list and will not address you any more on this matter. No need for you to reply to this post and please don't pm me any more.

I apologize for sounding harsh. I doubt you're used to people talking to you on this level, but it needed to be said. I hope you can understand my intent. May God bless you and your family. :heart

Re: Threadjack Alert
 

:lol Tear me down and then say, "I'm ignoring you and May God bless you." Love it!

I make no secret of my dissatisfaction with the status of much of Christian culture and this post would be a great example as to why. Christians aren't very receptive to being called on their inconsistencies. It seems the same thing occurred in the early New Testament when someone started calling the religious establishment of the day on their inconsistencies.

So you have expressed your opinion as I have expressed mine. I knew I would be treated harshly and hear some rough things when I chose to object to morbid and tasteless jokes. I'll take the heat. If anyone feels I'm on a "high horse", so be it. I didn't object to this stuff to get patted on the back.

So those who want to tell, laugh at, and excuse jokes about slapping a lady, drowning her, or a joke that implies that a Native American is stupid, and THEN go to church and speak in tongues, shout, dance, and then post on a forum about how you have "The Truth", go right ahead. Your actions are much more convincing than my arguments.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Guess I was wrong!!:ursofunny

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

You just made it. ;)

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Wait a minute, it was about slapping Pelosi, not a LADY!

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

here's something Sis A wrote on another thread:

I was talking about how important it is to be a real christian...and telling them that one time I read about how our vocal cords are formed to pronounce words...and was applying that in our everyday walk with God and how we must form a christian accent in all we do...being christian will become part of us and not something we pick up and lay down at will...
We must learn to know how to think like a christan...talk like a christian and live like a christian...

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Wow. Who's "Sis A"?

I once heard Bill Hybels talk about how Christ should make an impact on every part of our lives, including how we push our grocery carts.

He went on to talk about how the power of God, if we allow it, would cause us to consider the "cart-boy" digging in between all the cars for carts, and cars that may be dinged, and always take the cart back to the "Cart-Return".

He finished the statement by saying that God is not just a church experience, but a life experience.

I don't perceive myself being on a "high-horse", especially when I'm backing up observations with scripture, but I'm obviously open to criticism,which has been abundant. I'm simply suggesting that God should be considered in everything tiny compartment of our lives including our joking, teasing, and especially our treatment of others.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Sis. Alvear

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Saturday Night Live:

"Pelosi was so excited about the bill passing, she was on the verge of blinking!"

Now, that was FUNNY!!!!

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Oh no! that just can't be....

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

I suppose Jezebel would fall into your category of a lady also.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

:ursofunny

Good one!

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Yes.

next question.

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

Moron

Re: Ferd....A little humor for you.
 

I suppose you the gentlemen found you and told you they werent laughing?