Who Would You Invite?
 

There's been talk amongst the converts of the first Apostolic Church I attended in the late 70's about having a reunion. The Church was basically started by this small group. We became very close in those early years, and some of us have stayed in touch since then even though we are miles apart. I thought the idea was OK, but nothing has really happened yet. Still waiting for someone to put the event together.

But I've been struck by one very important thing regarding this gathering of the faithful; "Change". I asked my wife, "Who should be invited and are we going to leave those out who we feel are no longer with us?" I feel all should be welcome, regardless of how they've changed because this is the reality of human beings and the way of Religion. (I don't think I'll get my way on this; below is why)

The Pastor; after about 5 years he fell into adultery and lost his marriage. He remarried and so did his wife. I've been in touch with both of them. He no longer is Apostolic and the wife is deeply engrained by Rev Hightower's strange ideals.

The Assistant Pastor; He got married, had 4 children. He is divorced.

The following Assistant Pastor; He is still married but has had affairs with other women. He also started another Church, not Apostolic. A few years back, 2 out of the 3 children were considered backslid.

Another man, who was one step down from an Assistant and used in platform ministry; He is divorced. His wife and 4 children moved on. She is still attends a Pentecostal church. At this time, 1 daughter is no longer attending church, 2 of the other children had babies out of wedlock, and the ex-husband has remarried with kids from his new wife. He attends some kind of Church.

Another man, who Pastors a Pentecostal Church has been married as long as my wife and I, 30 years. 2 of his 3 sons are backslid.

My own children, 2 are divorced and backslid (no longer attending Apostolic Churches).

The point is this. We all started out with ideas about living for God, but much of what we presumed ended up not happening. Change hit us all right between the eyes. I've only addressed just a few of the folks that were a part of that Home Missions work.

I told my wife, no one should be left out. If we don't extend an open invitation to all, we continue with our denial of what really happens to people, and, we only feed the fire of building hatred by excluding people that need forgiveness and healing.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

What kind of reunion are you looking for? A shockamoo church service? Or a cordial dinner party?

If the first, doesn't sound like you'd have much of a turnout or list of "suitable" or "desirable" folks to invite.

If the second, invite everyone and just ask that everyone be respectful of each other. I always find that catching up with someone I haven't seen in a long time (especially if you're talking 30+ years) is a GREAT thing - regardless of how people have changed.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

A shockamoo church service...:toofunny:toofunny You ain't kidding! No, it wouldn't be a Church service, just a get together.

You're right, many wouldn't come, but at least we could extend a welcome.

I'm reminded of this impression that never left me as a child. My parents divorced when I was 11 years old. My mother and father NEVER spoke bad about one another. When my father passed away from lung cancer, we all went to the Funeral and mourned the loss of my dad.

That was over 20 years ago, and in a conversation with my mother the other day I told her, "Mom, dad never said one bad word about you when you guys split up. And, you never spoke evil of him." I thanked her for not putting bitterness in my heart, as that could have been so easily done, leaving me with a life of hatred towards those who fail.

People make bad choices, ones they regret. In the end, we will all need mercy.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I often think this is the only way Apostolics know how to get together. If you don't have a service (with an offering, of course), you just ain't doin' it right. Then you go out to eat afterward, of course. :ursofunny
That's very impressive for both your parents. I wish I could take back every discouraging or disrespectful thing I've ever said. We have no problem forgetting things we'd like to remember, but can't seem to forget things we'd like to forget. Bitterness is a root, and it's not plucked out easily.

Best wishes for your reunion. God bless!

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I'd invite them all and indicate that the invitation has gone out to all. That way no one is blindsided with another person's attendance. lol

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

sounds good to me.

Whoever and wherever these people are right now, they are all loved unconditionally by God and have been part of your past. It's like your family. We don't get to choose who is family and who isn't.

Like the Bible says,
"You can pick your family,
you can pick your nose,
but you can't pick your family."

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I'd always heard that you can pick your friends
You can pick your nose
But you can't pick your friends nose

:lol

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

What actually stirred this pot was this. I'm on Facebook, friends with one of the women I mentioned in my post. Well, her ex sends me a Friend Request. I knew him long before I knew her and had no intention of mentioning ONE word about her or him in conversation. I've learned to stay out of people's hatred for one another.

Well, she gets mad anyway, even after I told her I'm not going to let either of them bash each other, PERIOD, END OF STORY.

She still can't seem to accept that, and she is the one who wants this grand reunion. That's when it really came to me; there is no reason he should be left out of the invite. If we exclude him, I somehow feel we have lost our Christian spirit. This also brought back the memories of my mom and dad, and how they kept peace despite not being married anymore. Later in life I learned many things about my father, and my mother had every reason to bad mouth him if she chose to do so.

When the Lord gave the parable about gathering people for a feast, we all know the Lord of the supper chose those we might despise. :thumbsup

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

Thanks, Sam. We can always count on your incredibly DEEP take on things.

:grampa

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

If it is a church activity for people who used to come, invite everyone who used to come. If she is the one that wants a get together, and she wants to exclude people, she should have a get together for her old friends (no mention of the church) on her time and in her own facility.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

It is thought provoking indeed to read about what has happened in all of those people's lives.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I agree with your position, NFS. I think that whatever healing might be needed could only come about if "everyone" were invited. Openness and acceptance of old friends and loved ones is not the same thing as necessarily condoning every single choice that they made over the years.

What's with "Reverend Hightower?" I remember that being a fictional character of William Faulkner's. Did someone make it a "reality?"

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

Invite Jesus. Have plenty of water handy, and you won't have to buy wine. :heeheehee

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I agree. This event is for those who were part of building this Church, and I feel all should be welcome. This whole issue has made me ponder much of who we are. When we begin to tell people they are not accepted because of a past, present, or potential future problem, that would leave us ALL out.

I also see this as UnChrist-like.

Maybe there could be some kind of clause in the invitation, stating, "We realize many of us have taken different paths in life, having similar experiences ourselves. Please be kind, patient, and considerate of those who attend that may have offended you, keeping in mind that all need forgiveness."

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

Amen, Jermyn. I have left much out, and I think there is something to learn from this.

The next Church we attended, which was quite large, is full of the same stories. Every now and then I pull out the old Church Directory, which is full of photos, considering the places people have gone.

It used to break my heart to look at these pictures, but I try not to be so critical anymore. People struggle in this life, and the burden is sometimes more than we can bear. I never want to forget this.

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

Pel, I had a powerful experience several years ago. I was angry with a past relative. I was bitter, and felt justified.

I went to Church on a Sunday morning and the message was on forgiveness. It hammered me to the floor. I realized I was holding a grudge, even though the relative was guilty of fault. But my fault was far worse, because I didn't want to pardon them.

The only answer was (for me) to tell this person to their face, "I'm sorry for holding this sin to your charge. I'm sincerely sorry". I acted and have never regretted this experience.

This was over 15 years ago, and this relative, who is my stepfather, is now one of my closest friends. In fact, he has told my mother that he loves me more than his biological children. When we are with strangers, he always introduces me as, "This is my son". (Tears come to my eyes typing this)

Re: Who Would You Invite?
 

I'm hoping for a "Red" miracle...:bdayparty