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-   -   Brother and Sister (https://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com/showthread.php?t=36344)

Hoovie 08-04-2011 04:41 PM
Brother and Sister
 
Do you prefer church folks call you brother or sister? Why/why not?

Michael The Disciple 08-04-2011 04:43 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Maybe the first few times its all right but to formal. John said "greet the friends by name".

tstew 08-04-2011 04:57 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoovie (Post 1086828)
Do you prefer church folks call you brother or sister? Why/why not?
I prefer to be called brother. I haven't thought about it that much, but I just feel that sister would be a little inappropriate.

shag 08-04-2011 05:04 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
No. Please don't precede my name with brother.
As a matter of fact I sometimes like to call people by their first name at church because many just look at me like "I can't believe u didn't call me brother or sister first. I just like messing with religious traditions that folks cling to and consider almost a heaven or hell thing if you don't go along.

Gets me also how new folks come to church and those in the church introduce themselves by saying "hello, I'm Brother or sister so and so.

RandyWayne 08-04-2011 05:08 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I don't mind calling older folks "Brother" or "Sister". It sort of replaces Mr or Mrs to me. But I really don't like using it for anyone else outside of the lodge where I have no problem saying "Brother Kramden" or "Brother Norton".

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:11 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
It's an interesting tradition. Do other churches do this, or is it a UPC thing?

TGBTG 08-04-2011 05:19 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoovie (Post 1086842)
It's an interesting tradition. Do other churches do this, or is it a UPC thing?
A lot of other churches say Brother and Sister not just UPC. Btw, I've never been to a UPC...

trialedbyfire 08-04-2011 05:21 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by shag (Post 1086838)
No. Please don't precede my name with brother.
As a matter of fact I like to call people by their first name at church because many just look at me like "I can't believe u didn't call me brother or sister first. I just like messing with religious traditions that folks cling to and consider almost a heaven or hell thing if you don't go along.

Gets me also how new folks come to church and those in the church introduce themselves by saying "hello, I'm Brother or sister so and so.
Granted not calling someone "brother" or "sister" is not a sin but pride is.:thumbsup

Yes, it's a tradition, but it's a tradition based in scripture.

"Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren; The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity" 1 Timothy 5:1-2

I refer to most as "sister" or "brother" who are in the faith, I refer to the older women as "mother", who are in the faith. I do so out respect not out of necessity. For those who don't hold to that tradition, I'm fine with, but making an effort not to in order to attract attention is pretty prideful to me.

To those of you that have achieved this heightened level of scripture knowledge as to where you can look down on all of us silly apostolic folks and our traditions, I warn you, pride comes before the fall (Proverbs 16:17).

trialedbyfire 08-04-2011 05:23 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoovie (Post 1086842)
It's an interesting tradition. Do other churches do this, or is it a UPC thing?
PAW, PCAF, COOLJC I know for a fact all three. Most every COGIC and African American Pentecostal Church does as well OP or not. I know also some Assemblies of God and Charismatic churches do. Most African American Baptist churches and some black Methodist churches. A whole chunk of the protestant movement does this. It's a VERY common practice in evangelical christiandom.

RandyWayne 08-04-2011 05:26 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoovie (Post 1086842)
It's an interesting tradition. Do other churches do this, or is it a UPC thing?
There is also the Water Buffaloes, the Royal Order of the Racoons, and the Grand Mystic Royal Order of the Nobles of the Ali Babel Temple of the shrine.

seguidordejesus 08-04-2011 05:26 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Just "Ben" works for me.

tstew 08-04-2011 05:30 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by tstew (Post 1086834)
I prefer brother. I haven't thought about it that much, but I just feel that sister would be a little inappropriate.
Of course I was being TIC here and messing with Hoovie's original question. I let people call me what they feel most comfortable with. Some people prefer to call you brother, and I'm not one to try to force them to call me what I want to be called.

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:31 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
TBF, thanks for the info.

Do you ever find yourself conflicted in knowing when to use the term? Do they need to be in your faith tradition and dressing similar to your church to earn the title?

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:34 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by tstew (Post 1086859)
Of course I was being TIC here and messing with Hoovie's original question. I let people call me what they feel most comfortable with. Some people prefer to call you brother, and I'm not one to try to force them to call me what I want to be called.
Amen. Generally true for me to. Though it can be very uncomfortable if it's expected publicly, while at the same time not extending the honor to other Christians who may be present.

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:36 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
So it's not just a OP thing? I have not heard it around other Evangelicals - like baptist etc, unless they were speaking of a minister and used "Bro." in lieu of Pastor.

Dagwood 08-04-2011 05:36 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by trialedbyfire (Post 1086851)
Granted not calling someone "brother" or "sister" is not a sin but pride is.:thumbsup

Yes, it's a tradition, but it's a tradition based in scripture.

"Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren; The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity" 1 Timothy 5:1-2

I refer to most as "sister" or "brother" who are in the faith, I refer to the older women as "mother", who are in the faith. I do so out respect not out of necessity. For those who don't hold to that tradition, I'm fine with, but making an effort not to in order to attract attention is pretty prideful to me.

To those of you that have achieved this heightened level of scripture knowledge as to where you can look down on all of us silly apostolic folks and our traditions, I warn you, pride comes before the fall (Proverbs 16:17).


Here's the definition of "intreat," 1. to ask (a person) earnestly; beg or plead with; implore 2. to make an earnest request or petition for (something)

Where do you get it that it's a tradition based on scripture? No where does it state to address your fellow bretheren as "brother so-and-so, sister so-and-so" using the scripture you've referenced...

And to use the "pride comes before a fall" as an "oh, by the way" makes it sound as if you already know someone else's pride when they disagree with you...

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:37 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I understand respect and formality etc. but I think there are additional implications intended by many who use the term.

Dagwood 08-04-2011 05:39 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Personally, I don't care for being addressed as "brother" before my name. However, I will also respect those who do so out of habit...or tradition, either way. For those peeps my age, just leave it off...

Pragmatist 08-04-2011 05:43 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I don't like it and never have. You can just call me by my name.

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:48 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dagwood (Post 1086866)
Personally, I don't care for being addressed as "brother" before my name. However, I will also respect those who do so out of habit...or tradition, either way. For those peeps my age, just leave it off...
What if you have to choose between receiving/giving that respect and being party to disrespect - when others are not offered similar title?

I see a teeny bit of elitism and establishment of second rate Christianity in play.

trialedbyfire 08-04-2011 05:50 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dagwood (Post 1086864)
[/B]

Here's the definition of "intreat," 1. to ask (a person) earnestly; beg or plead with; implore 2. to make an earnest request or petition for (something)

Where do you get it that it's a tradition based on scripture? No where does it state to address your fellow bretheren as "brother so-and-so, sister so-and-so" using the scripture you've referenced...

And to use the "pride comes before a fall" as an "oh, by the way" makes it sound as if you already know someone else's pride when they disagree with you...

First never said that scripture tells us to address each other in any way. In christ we are all brothers and sisters, and scripture makes us clear that we should respect each other as such. Because of this many of us in evangelical protestantism traditionally call each other by the name "brother" or "sister". We do the same thing and respect the mothers and the elders as such.

MY PROBLEM comes in when that is trashed as some evil extrabiblical tradition forced upon people that we have to break away from to be free from bondage by the "I-know-more-then-you" crowd.

It's really not THAT serious. The church has traditions. This one isn't MANDADTED in scripture, but scripture makes it clear that we are to respect one another as brothers and sisters, so many feel a way to do this is to use such titles as a formality. Of course, this will be treated as a form of bondage by whoever wants to fool themselves into believing that every OP church holds their members in some sort of prison of tradition (moreso then any other church). I honestly don't know if Paul and the Apostles called each other "brother" or "sister" do I think they'd have a problem with us doing so? Of course not, and priding yourself on not doing it is just as dangerous as condemning someone to Hell for not doing it. My point.

trialedbyfire 08-04-2011 05:53 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoovie (Post 1086863)
So it's not just a OP thing? I have not heard it around other Evangelicals - like baptist etc, unless they were speaking of a minister and used "Bro." in lieu of Pastor.
I have but like I said with baptists it's typically and African American thing. African American churches generally use the term regardless of denomination (for the most part).

ImThankful 08-04-2011 05:56 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I just prefer to be called by my first name.

Hoovie 08-04-2011 05:57 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by trialedbyfire (Post 1086870)
First never said that scripture tells us to address each other in any way. In christ we are all brothers and sisters, and scripture makes us clear that we should respect each other as such. Because of this many of us in evangelical protestantism traditionally call each other by the name "brother" or "sister". We do the same thing and respect the mothers and the elders as such.

MY PROBLEM comes in when that is trashed as some evil extrabiblical tradition forced upon people that we have to break away from to be free from bondage by the "I-know-more-then-you" crowd.

It's really not THAT serious. The church has traditions. This one isn't MANDADTED in scripture, but scripture makes it clear that we are to respect one another as brothers and sisters, so many feel a way to do this is to use such titles as a formality. Of course, this will be treated as a form of bondage by whoever wants to fool themselves into believing that every OP church holds their members in some sort of prison of tradition (moreso then any other church). I honestly don't know if Paul and the Apostles called each other "brother" or "sister" do I think they'd have a problem with us doing so? Of course not, and priding yourself on not doing it is just as dangerous as condemning someone to Hell for not doing it. My point.

Right. It's not the showing of respect that bothers me.

When we know that is how respect and acceptance are shown (a public and personal statement), it becomes disrespect when it is not afforded to others who are in Christ but out of the clique.

shag 08-04-2011 05:58 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by trialedbyfire (Post 1086851)
Granted not calling someone "brother" or "sister" is not a sin but pride is.:thumbsup

Yes, it's a tradition, but it's a tradition based in scripture.

"Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren; The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity" 1 Timothy 5:1-2

I refer to most as "sister" or "brother" who are in the faith, I refer to the older women as "mother", who are in the faith. I do so out respect not out of necessity. For those who don't hold to that tradition, I'm fine with, but making an effort not to in order to attract attention is pretty prideful to me.

To those of you that have achieved this heightened level of scripture knowledge as to where you can look down on all of us silly apostolic folks and our traditions, I warn you, pride comes before the fall (Proverbs 16:17).

I always refer to those of age in the church as "elder" or "sister", or even Mr or Mrs to show respect. But the ones in the middle age(my age) that grew up in "the church", and think its a requirement of "the body of Chriist" (U know the REAL TRUE body) to refer to everyone as brother or sister, and are devastated according to their facial expression when you dont say it, and think youre backslidden because you didnt call them brother David or Sister Suzie, those are the ones I like to bring back to earth by not saying brother or sister. That particular type of traditional mindset (to that degree)to me, pushes being "so heavenly minded, no earthly good category".

Hoovie 08-04-2011 06:00 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by tstew (Post 1086834)
I prefer to be called brother. I haven't thought about it that much, but I just feel that sister would be a little inappropriate.
LOL! Leave it to tstew to turn the thread into gender identity disorder thread!

trialedbyfire 08-04-2011 06:04 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by shag (Post 1086876)
I always refer to those of age in the church as "elder" or "sister", or even Mr or Mrs to show respect. But the ones in the middle age that grew up in "the church", and think its a requirement of "the body of Chriist" (U know the REAL TRUE body) to refer to everyone as brother or sister, and are devastated according to their facial expression when you dont say it, and think youre backslidden because you didnt call them brother David or Sister Suzie, those are the ones I like to bring back to earth by not saying brother or sister. That particular type of mindset to me, falls under the "so heavenly minded, no earthly good category". Call it pride if you wish.
The pride comes in when you feel like you are obligated to "bring them down to Earth".

Hoovie 08-04-2011 06:07 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I hear you Shag.

I am most concerned by what others perceive - outsiders - Christian and non Christian both.

I could care less if a group wanted and expected members to wear tin foil on their heads. I could probably be convinced to wear one too - if it made them feel better.

But what does the rest of society think? Does that matter?

Again I think the dynamics are bigger than the foil. Very often, there are serious underlying statements being made, be they good or bad.

Cindy 08-04-2011 06:30 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by tstew (Post 1086834)
I prefer to be called brother. I haven't thought about it that much, but I just feel that sister would be a little inappropriate.
:heeheehee

Hoovie 08-04-2011 06:33 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cindy (Post 1086886)
:heeheehee
The most interesting part is that he thinks it "a little inappropriate"!

Cindy 08-04-2011 06:38 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I don't care one way or the other how I'm addressed. I call others brother or sister out of respect, because it's the way I was raised. And unless someone requests otherwise I will keep doing it. I do the same with those of other denominations as well. I do prefer to be called Sister Cindy by children and teenagers.

shag 08-04-2011 07:14 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by trialedbyfire (Post 1086880)
The pride comes in when you feel like you are obligated to "bring them down to Earth".
So someone has a pride issue for not calling folks brother or sister, that expect to ALWAYS be called brother or sister, even when it has NOTHING to do with respect based on age?-(ie speaking of children addressing respect to adults, or addressing elders)

So now which of these genuinely have the pride issue, brother?

Hoovie 08-04-2011 07:16 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Shag, stop asking tough questions. Just roll out the red carpet and ready the chief seats!!

Cindy 08-04-2011 07:18 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Y'all just don't call me elder, please. Thank you very much.

Sherri 08-04-2011 07:34 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
They call us Pastor Eddie and Pastor Sherri (or sometimes just Sherri).

Hoovie 08-04-2011 07:38 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Pastor Sherri, are you in the US?

commonsense 08-04-2011 08:07 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pragmatist (Post 1086868)
I don't like it and never have. You can just call me by my name.
I totally agree.

canam 08-04-2011 08:09 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
depends kids and older people and the pastor i dont mind ,my age or close they call me first name.

*AQuietPlace* 08-04-2011 08:15 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
I've never cared for it. And it has nothing to do with pride - it's not that I mind calling other people that, I just don't really like being called that myself. Simply calling me by my name is perfectly fine. I just think the Brother and Sister thing sounds so odd out in the real world. Makes me feel like I'm part of some secret society with a secret handshake or something. ;)

If we call Jesus - Jesus - and don't consider it disrespectful, why is it disrespectful to call each other by our names alone?

BeenThinkin 08-04-2011 08:17 PM
Re: Brother and Sister
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace* (Post 1086926)
I've never cared for it. And it has nothing to do with pride - it's not that I mind calling other people that, I just don't really like being called that myself. Simply calling me by my name is perfectly fine. I just think the Brother and Sister thing sounds so odd out in the real world. Makes me feel like I'm part of some secret society with a secret handshake or something. ;)

If we call Jesus - Jesus - and don't consider it disrespectful, why is it disrespectful to call each other by our names alone?

:thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup

Been Thinkin


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