Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Assume you are listening to your pastor preach, and then suddenly he makes a statement that you believe is contrary to the actual meaning of scripture (though he uses scripture to justify his position and you have scripture to justify the position you have, which is completely opposite of his/hers). You may be just as well informed of a position in which your pastor is taking a completely opposite stand on, but you feel he is in error.

1. Do you politely schedule a meeting with the pastor and discuss the disagreement over the teaching and try to come to a mutual understanding without trying to convert one another to each others' position?

2. Do you ignore it, and let it go, and pray that God would correct him/her assuming you yourself are not the one truly in error?

3. Do you leave the church without any explanation, because you can't believe that someone would be so ignorant as to make non-biblical remarks from the pulpit?

4. Or option #4 (fill in the blank how you would hand it if the aforementioned options are not feasible to you)

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Keep in mind, as a human, a pastor is subject to error just as much as anyone else. To think that a pastor is infallible is a doctrine that carries over from Catholicism where the Pope is believed to be exempt from making mistakes, and even if he does then he is just in his mistakes, because he is the vicar of Christ.

With that in mind, how would you handle dealing with a pastor you believe to be in error?

(For the record, I have no qualms with my pastor. I'm very satisfied. This is a thread just to stir discussion.)

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I did that one day..told him after service in his office..time to be moving on..no need to cause a scene

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This is what we did when our pastor got into the whole "sex for procreation ONLY" and "NO sex on Sundays!" during a special class for married couples before the normal Sunday service.

We should have went to him and told him why we were leaving (a few other who left as well DID tell him) but we didn't want to sit through a pointless morning service just to talk to have afterwards when we could have been doing better things, like having sex.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

It depends on a number of factors.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

When I disagree with my pastor, I confront him in the car on the way to go eat dinner. Or sometimes after we get home.:happydance

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Do you actually tell him what you disagree with? Or do you just give the silent treatment and make him figure it out? LOL

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:spit

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Yes, I would. I'd probably just email him. He'd probably be the one to set up a face to face meeting to talk about it. But, I know my pastor wouldn't be threatened if I were to challenge something he says. He'd also be able to back it up not only with Bible, but with other theologians and authors and be able to provide dissenting opinions as well, to balance it out.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

The last UPC church I was in, the Pastor has, several times, misquoted scripture and preached his interpretation on that misquote.

None of the men in that church, not even the Assistant Pastor had the guts to correct him. As a female in the church system, I did not feel it was my place to correct the Pastor in his teaching. Had I took a notion to do so, I would have been ostracized.

Maybe I should have corrected him on that, because I ended up being ostracized anyway concerning something that was of far less importance.

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How often do you think folks go with option #2 on my list?:

If this approach is taken, how much further in to error do you passively permit the pastor to go? Unfortunately, I know so many people who will go down with the ship and its captain before the abandon it instead of getting on board with truth (or what is believed to be truth).

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It's largely circumstantial for me. Some pastors are very uncomfortable with being questioned. I had a pastor I was on first name basis with that I would have heated discussions with all the time because he believed some pretty weird stuff (at least as far as I'm concerned.) The discussions were never really bad for our relationship, it was like iron sharpening iron. Unfortunately he continued to say some weird stuff from the pulpit and in conversation. Stuff like, whenever you sin you lose the Holy Spirit, one of the secret names for the Holy Spirit is the name "that" because Peter said "this is that which was spoken by the prophet Joel." He condoned the magic hair doctrine in conversation and practice. He believed that if someone in the church was in sexual sin that the rest of the church would get physically sick. He got this from the passage "for this cause many are sick among you and many sleep" which clearly teaches that those that take communion without discerning the Lord's body may incur hurt upon themselves, thus, teaching something way different than what he was proposing. Salvation justification ultimately came from your works. When my heart caught on fire for the doctrine of justification by faith and I explained it to him he said that he didn't know how to respond and never heard anything like it. I love the guy. Things like this is why I don't believe that questioning a pastor is wrong. I do, however think that they should be "entreated as an elder" as Paul wrote, meaning, you should approach them with respect. I, admittedly have not always exuded as much of this as I could at times, but, I do think that it is the best way.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

It depends on what is said. There are times that my pastor has asked me what was said wrong. I try very hard to not show a reaction, but he can still tell (that is frustrating).

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Did 1, a couple times, except we did try to convert each other. Didn't work. :lol

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Whatever method one uses in "challenging" a pastor I think the spirit, attitude, and motives of the one doing the challenging are key.

If one is confronting their pastor, or anyone for that matter, out of a sense of superiority or to cause conflict intentionally then they are just wrong.

If one approaches the matter with meekness, sincerity, and in love then they can be assured that whatever the response they will not be at fault.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

AMEN

Although, personally, I think "challenge" is the wrong word - possibly, "question". ???

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I agree that "challenge" seems confrontational. Like you I would have used "question".

The funny thing is that someone could be correct on the basis of their "challenge" but violate so many Christian principles in making their challenge that they are as wrong as the person they are challenging, just in a different area!

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

In some cases a pastor needs to be confronted, because too often they go unchecked and feel as though they have a license to say whatever they want to by virtue of being an oracle of God.

It's all situational. In most cases, pastors who who something contrary do it out of ignorance and don't need to be cornered and made to feel defensive, because it was an honest mistake on their part and I'm sure they will have the integrity to learn from it.

Then there are the rogues who feel like they are infallible and unteachable. Those types need to be confronted, cornered, challenged, and made accountable.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

We once had a Pastor who disagreed with another Pastor's ministry. He made the statement: (paraphrased) "If he's right (the other ministry), then I might as well take my 55 years of ministry and throw it down the drain".

My question would be this: Why would one ministry be right and the other "wrong"? Are the hands doing the work of the feet? Is the brain doing the work of the heart? Isn't the body supposed to be working in concert together as long as it is practicing Biblical Scripture?

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I would ask first that if your pastor is like this why are you there in the first place?

....and I know that many ARE in the same way that the frog is burnt in the beaker of water which is slowly heated.

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Number one seems to be best option and you disagree with the pastor it's best to discuss with it him and not with the members of the congregation.

Sometimes one might disagree with their pastor and on some subjects as pastors are not infallible.One must know what they believe and why they believe it,and one may not see eye to eye with one's pastor on everything and hold a differing view without causing disunity to the body of Christ and division to a congregation of believers.

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Dante, the verbage you use is very aggressive. To me it is the verbage I see used by people who want to be confrontational not for the sake of correcting something but for the sake of just being confrontational. Some people just like conflict and challenging others when they believe they have a case to make against them. As I pointed out in a previous post it is these people and these situations which can result in the one doing the challenging being as wrong as the one being challenged, just about something differerent.

I can understand the frustration at a preacher who is one of those know it alls who thinks they are infallible and who are unteachable. I just think there is a danger of being as bad of them in how you deal with them if one is not careful. As mama always said "two wrongs don't make a right!".

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For me the one-man-show opens the door for extreme beliefs and behavior. It has been said, "Absolute power corrupts." The early church was overseen by a plurality of elders.
By this one would think those stepping out-of-bounds could be put in check.

It has become that a person who holds a title of {pastor} is an earthly surrogate. A high priesthood over the lower priesthood. The church systems today very much resembles Judaism/Catholicism in view of ruling over laity.

I feel that one should not have to be in a position of confronting an individual who is called a pastor. Elders of that assembly should take notice and respond accordingly.

The use of titles seems to be escalating and the wearing of priestly garb is showing up.

There is a spirit behind these queer teachings.

For me, let the Elders respond.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

But...will the board members or elders rock the boat?

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We've had a few intense discussions. Lol

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Test the waters.

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Oftimes No, and that's part of why they were handpicked by the pastor to begin with. I was on the board a couple years, meetings one time a year to discuss a few things like concerning church finance/business like house rentals and shopping center stores owned by the church. Only purpose for having it was to be able to say it existed, IMO. Buncha yes sir men that had hardly anything to say at all, especially if it was anything conflicting with the mindset of the pastor.( I realize of course, it's nit that way everywhere.) I decided I wanted no part of that, and just baled. The yearly gift of a pocket knife or something, was not worth the guilt I had for being part it . Some of those guys set thru years of entire (only annual) meetings without saying a word at all, unless called on for an opinion, and then some of them wouldn't say anything yay or nay. Is that the revs fault? He put'm there, not the church, they should've been elected by the church annuallly at the least anyway, IMO.

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There have been times that I disagreed with the pastor and never said anything; other times I have politely asked the pastor about later. When you feel a need to ask the pastor about something, there is a right way to do it. Sometimes what you are so sure about may be wrong.

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This does bring up something that exists in alot of churches where the saints are afraid to question what they are taught,those in leadership or oversight positions should not mind explaining what they teach to those who inquire about it,because if one has a handle on what they teach and preach they should not mind explaining it according to the scripture.

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Yea, I'm sure that happens.

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Sounds good Bro. But we know much is riding on peer pressure from the Org. Truth has little to do with peer pressure and tradition.

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My pastor has always been open to people asking him questions. He has always said that if he did not have an answer right away, make an appointment, and he would have your answer for you. 99 percent of the issue is the way that one approaches the pastor with a question, difficulty, or problem.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Great post CC1.

It depends upon your standing (also known as pecking order) in the local church.
Some examples: Are you a seasoned saint that the pastor trusts? Are you a hard-charging newly-minted Bible college graduate? A new convert?
Do you exude sincerity or superiority? Do you demonstrate a meek spirit or combative spirit?
Those examples don't even address the severity/non-severity of the false doctrine nor the spirit of the pastor. Correcting it is not as easy as it sounds.
In most of the cases (jmo) the best thing a child of God can do is leave without having to or NEEDING to explain themselves.

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

:highfive

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I know many people who did just that. Nobody knew why they left...so they made up their own reasons.

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Wow, this is really a great question, and a great topic! Many wouldn't even approach the subject, but you've laid out some very viable options.

As a former pastor, I would want someone to come to me if they disagreed. There are few things I hate worse, even now that I'm in the secular corporate world, than having to try and read someone's mind and figure out why they are upset.

I would appreciate a private meeting where this person laid out their reasons and we could discuss logically. At the end of the meeting, I may still maintain my position, but would completely understand if the other person decided he or she needed to move on. OR, I may see their point, realize I was in error and correct my own position.

Either way, relationship was built, and by demonstrating this type of behavior, I would make it easy for people to come to me in the future, not create the perception that I was unapproachable.

Believe it or not, this happens in the corporate world, as well. The team of people that I manage know two things about me - I will praise them publicly and correct them privately; and that I am approachable about anything. I may not always see it their way, but I show them the respect of hearing and considering their opinion.

The good thing is, many times they are right, and we alter our course - and in the process, build a great strong team.

So, to answer your question - whether I was the pastor or the member, I would still answer the same - let's talk about it!

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Wow, you have said a mouthful here! :thumbsup

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

:thumbsup Now that I can respect!

Re: Would You Ever Challenge Your Pastor?
 

Being the son of a pastor, I can say what has frustrates the pastor and his wife more than almost anything else, are people who are unhappy, but act as if the pastor should know by osmosis what the problem is and fix it. And if the unhappy people are told to talk to the pastor, often they respod that it would not make a difference anyway. That is nothing more than a lying excuse to justify their pride and justify their hurt feelings. The fact is that most pastors are willing, able, and ready to hear what their saints are feeling and thinking.

Many times, people attempt to approach the pastor at the wrong time or in the wrong way (I have been guilty of this, and we both confessed it to each other and resolved the issue). Do not approach the pastor with it after he has just preached his guts out and is exhausted. Nor approach him if he has a lot going on at that point. The best thing to do is make an appointment to see him, and treat him the way you might if you were approaching your employer (I am talking about using a respectful tone, gestures, etc.). Be sensitive, you do not know what he might be dealing with. If he has reactions that are out of character for him, extend him grace and realize that he is under a great amount of pressure (he may be bivocational and be working shifts that do not allow him much rest, he must be prepared to preach every service, he is often doing much of the maintenance around the church, he has to deal with every member of the congregation, and maintain a relationship with his wife and family, and you never know what else may be happening behind the scenes).


To put it simply, be sweet to your pastor. He probably could use it.