Apostolic Friends Forum - The Sin of the Elder Son

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The Sin of the Elder Son

We've been studying the parable of the Prodigal Son for about a month now using Timothy Keller's book "Prodigal God" as a template. The book is outstanding and really has helped me see a lot about myself that I don't want to see.

The parable of the Prodigal Son has a very strong gospel message to it when you dig deeply. It's very obvious the younger son is lost and alienated from his father because he rebels, demands his inheritance and leaves to venture out on his own wasting his wealth on wild living. He loses everything and finds himself in a pigsty eventually coming to his senses and returning to the father. Most of us think of this part of the story when we think of this parable.

In reality the true meaning of the parable is found in the second part of the story. The context of the parable begins in Luke 15 in which Jesus is criticized by the Pharisees and teachers of the law for fellowshipping with tax collectors and notorious sinners. What follows are three parables about the lost sheep, the lost coin and then what is traditionally called the Prodigal Son.

Jesus makes it apparent that his purpose was to seek and save that which was lost with these parables in response to the criticisms. It was seen in their culture as tacit approval of someone's lifestyle and what they represented if one was to sit and eat with them, thus the complaints from the religious. Jesus makes the point that heaven rejoices when a sinner comes to repentance. But in the third parable Jesus adds another dimension.

In the parable of the lost son, another son is included. The elder son who stayed home, who worked hard, who stayed faithful and loyal to his father is added at the end of the story. When word comes to him at the conclusion of yet another hard day of work that his younger brother has come home and his father has received him back as a son, throwing a huge feast to celebrate his return, the elder son is angry and refuses to attend the celebration.

The conversation that ensues between father and son is revealing. "Look, I have slaved for you all these years and I have never disobeyed you. Now this son of yours who has wasted your wealth on prostitutes has come home and you have killed the fattened calf. You have never thrown me a party, not even killing a goat for me and my friends!" Jesus is obviously speaking directly to His critics, paralleling them with the elder son.

Although the elder son didn't take the route of the younger son, it's obvious his relationship with his father is not right either. His faithfulness to his father is seen as slavery, he is angry with his father and criticizes him for what he's done. He feels cheated and that he's earned a celebration unlike his inferior younger brother (that he refuses to call his brother).

The elder son, although not aware of it, is just as alienated from his father as the younger son. He's sleeping under the father's roof and eating at his table and working in his fields, but he doesn't have a right relationship with his dad. He too is guilty of the same sin as his younger brother, namely, an attitude and desire of independence from his father. The younger son wanted the father's goods, but not the father. Isn't the elder son essentially saying the same thing? He wants what he deserves. What he deserves is the reward of hard work, slavery even, and dutiful obedience, keeping all of the rules the father expected him to keep. He certainly deserves more than this wayward child who has disgraced himself, the family name and wasted 1/3 of the family fortune.

What is missing in the elder son is a sense of affection and joy and devotion to his father out of love and trust in him. This is the overarching lesson Jesus is trying to communicate. The Pharisees and teachers of the law were just as lost as the tax collectors and sinners Jesus fellowshipped with. The problem was that the younger sons knew they were lost, lying in the filth of their sins and they were coming to their senses and returning to God through Jesus. The religious folks were blind to their own lostness. Because they view salvation and goodness through a religious lens, they see themselves as good by comparison, better than "those sons of yours who have wasted their lives", and deserving of the good life. Pharisees believe if they are good, God owes them a comfortable, healthy, wealthy and blessed life. And when suffering comes to one who serves their father simply out of duty, hard work, discipline and strict adherence, anger ensues, bitterness is birthed and cries of "that's not fair!" emerges.

The story should be called "The Parable of Two Lost Sons" because that's what is portrayed. One son chooses wild living and immorality as the path to happiness and fulfillment. The other son chooses self righteousness and rule keeping as the road to finding purpose. And both paths lead to a breach in a right relationship with the father. Both the sinner and the Pharisee are lost.

Jesus makes these contrasts on other occasions. In Luke 18 Jesus tells of the Pharisee and the tax collector and their approach to God in prayer. The tax collector goes home justified with God because he repents and sees himself as a sinner. The Pharisee proudly declares his worthiness and points out how he is so much better than the tax collector and goes home with his sin remaining. In Matthew 20 Jesus tells the parable of the 11th hour laborers who receive the same reward as those who work all day long. The point is that in our eyes God isn't fair, but God doesn't care about how we measure fairness, He loves everyone and He wants all to come to repentance.

The convicting point for me is that although I have committed plenty of sins in my lifetime, I don't really relate to the younger son. I never had that season of "wild living" where I sowed wild oats and rebelled and walked away from how I was raised. I was a pretty good kid, raised in church, stayed out of trouble, went straight to Bible school, stayed out of trouble there, went straight into ministry as a youth pastor at 21, got married at 26, had three kids, became a pastor at 34 and have served in that capacity since. I am an older brother. All I've ever known is the Father's house, the Father's table, the Father's fields. And yet I find myself often alienated from my Father. I find myself angry sometimes because I feel I deserve better. Sometimes I feel cheated because I see what appears to be rebellious sons fairing better than me. I catch myself looking down on others for not being as hard working or disciplined or obedient as I am. I find myself sometimes wanting the Father's goods but not the Father Himself.

A quote from the book is profound. Keller quotes someone whom I can't recall who said, "the problem with Pharisees is not their sins, it's their damnable good works." Repentance is more than acknowledging our immorality. It's also acknowledging all the times we did the right things for the wrong reasons. Whenever we pray, give, fast, serve, worship, help, forgo the forbidden fruit or do anything else that is good and right for any other reason than simply out of a love for and a cherishing of our Father and wanting to do nothing more than to please Him, to be close to Him and to bear the fruit of His Spirit in our lives, we sin. Self righteousness is as damnable a sin as any act of immorality and rebellion. In fact self righteousness is a form of rebellion in it's own right. It's seeking salvation independent of God. It's an attempt at being your own savior. It's a sin that is subtle and difficult to detect because it is clothed in everything that is right, admirable and good.

In the parable, the younger son is restored to the father, the elder son is not. The younger son joins with the father in the celebration and feast while the story ends with the elder son outside of the celebration arguing with his father. It's a sobering prospect to me.

The only way to a right relationship with the Father is through our true elder brother, Jesus. The elder brother in the parable is angry no doubt because he knows that for his brother to be fully restored, he is going to have to give up part of the inheritance that he was to receive upon his father's death. The younger brother in being restored to son status will get another share of the inheritance upon his father's death. Jesus was the true elder brother willing to give up His share of the inheritance so that we could be received back into the family. We wasted our lives in sin. He remained obedient completely to the Father and deserves all of inheritance remaining. But instead, He gave up His life, so that we could be restored. He is the heir, but we have been made joint-heirs with Christ. Thanks be to our big brother, Jesus!

God forgive me for having an elder brother attitude and seeking to live a righteous life independent of You! Forgive me of my sins both religious and immoral and help me to simply love You with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength!

Be careful of an elder brother spirit, Christian. It is dangerous and subtle. I believe that the antidote to the elder brother attitude is found in Matthew 6: give in secret, pray in secret, fast in secret. Whatever you do for God, let it be between Him and you. Be careful not to be a public Christian only and never or rarely a private Christian. When was the last time you and the Father had a heart to heart conversation that didn't involve other people around to see you or hear you pray? When was the last time you gave or served in a capacity that only the Father saw and knew what you did? When was the last time you prayed and asked NOTHING of the Father and simply praised Him, adored Him, exalted and magnified Him? Do you serve the Father for nothing more than the fact that He first loved you? Can you trust Him entirely for your salvation? Can you accept that others may get blessed while you may suffer? Can you celebrate others getting the fattened calf? Can you accept that God is sovereign and can do as He pleases, even when His generosity seems poured out on someone else? Do you want the Father or do you want the Father's goods?

Just food for thought...