Life Issues
 

I've been following this story from my hometown.

Two young boys survived a life of horror at the hands of their own father. The third one died at the hands of his father.

If these boys walked into your church building, how would some of you preachers try to embark a healing process for these boys?

What about their father? What made him do this? Is he not in need of salvation?

Excerpt:
"Police took the graphic and disturbing images just hours after the boy was found not breathing on Nov. 4 on the floor of the family's home on West Washington Street.

It was a principal's call home that triggered the nightmare of duct tape, beatings, humiliation and burns from a hot iron that eventually ended with Tramelle's death."

http://www.southbendtribune.com/news...,7765177.story

Re: Life Issues
 

"What about their father? What made him do this? Is he not in need of salvation?"

Well, assuming that he doesn't get the death sentence,
there are prison ministries. Oh, and he doesn't know it yet,
but he's about to get really humble--those types aren't
exactly heroes there.

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I really wish I wouldn't have read that.

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Yeah byrd, really humble.

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Me too.

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How do police officers, doctors, coroners, prosecutors, defense attorneys, and judges keep from losing their minds. They see so much horror. There is no sentence, no justice for these kinds of crimes against children. It is just sickening the evil that is among us.

Re: Life Issues
 

As a few here may say, "The boys just need to get over it. A good prayin-through at a pentecostal alter is what they need!".

Ya, it makes me sick too.

Re: Life Issues
 

I've seen a lot of this type of stuff from my years of hospital service. From 22 month old babies suffering internal damage after being sexually abused...to young children hanging themselves in a closet because of ...who knows what going on in their home life.

It is heartbreaking.

But this is why I put this particular issue on here. There is so much of this out there...these life issues that affect so many people while many Apostolic churches make an issue out of hair and standards.

Many people wish they do not read things like this. But...these are traumatic horrors that ordinary people go through...especially those who do not know God.

How many ministers can effectively help people who go through horrors like this? How many people in church can relate? How many saints would extend themselves to befriend someone, who maybe in their past has gone through one example of traumatization such as this? People like this are damaged goods when they walk into our church buildings. They are looking for Jesus to save them and to help them heal from abuse.

Scars from victims are not always visible. It is an erroneous statement to make that people victimize themselves when they leave a church...that they do not want to live for God. If only one knows what people go through outside the safe walls of our churches. Many people stuff years of abuse in some form down inside and choke on it because they do not know how to break free from it.

Re: Life Issues
 

You tend to blame everything on pentecostals don't you?


I could not read the story after some of the comments by those who did.

What a monster! Those poor children. :(

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These stories are not for the very sensitive...so I do understand.

It's just that I myself suffered abuse issues, though not as severe as these boys have.

I worked in hospitals, nursing homes and mental health places where I have seen all sorts of sufferings by human beings at the hands of others or by illness.

I am thinking that maybe Christ wants us to be a light, a Good Samaritan, a friend that sticks closers than a brother/sister to those who suffer. How can we help another's wounds?

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UPC, AoG, conservative Southern Baptist..... Far too many who are professional church goers have no idea how to deal with the real "issues" that occur to living, breathing people. I certainly didn't have THIS traumatic of anything happen to me but I did learn very early on not to be seen praying in public. People in the church just assumed that is all it took to make all of lifes problems vanish. "Praying" is were counseling begins and ends to far too many.

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A well-trained counselor who knows how to draw out and treat people who have suffered mentally should be acknowledged within the church to be an asset, along with prayer for healing. God can and does use people for His service, even for mental abuse by other people.

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http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/wor...183500809.html

Not as horrific as the opening post, but stupidity has no boundaries appparently.

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Well...one good thing about only being able to get dialup here is that the video did not start to play while I was reading the story.

The story alone made me angry and panic for the child all at the same time.

What are people thinking when they do stuff like this? And this child has to be raised by parents like this?

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I know, right. Or like a guy letting a kid ride on a tractor fender. What?

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wrong just wrong randy wayne

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wrong just wrong randy wayne

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I have known people who suffered horrible abuse, but it was a trip to the altar and baptism in Jesus' name that made them whole.

That having been said, of course there are going to be many issues that are going to need worked through. The nightmares, the memories, and the loss are going to be replaying through their minds constantly. All of these things will not be resolved in a day, they rarely are. However, if they are surrounded by love, godly discipline, godly people, and proper guidance, they will be able to say that each day is better than the one before. Time, distance, and God's love, mercy, and grace shown through His people will heal all wounds.

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Herein lies the key, Jay, what you just wrote. Yes, IF surrounded by love, they can recover. But when one walks into a den of vipers that care little for newcomers, they reopen wounds and rub salt into them.

I feel that your church may be very caring for the lost and newcomers. I pray that it stays that way. Continue to love God and each other in Jesus Name.

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Kerry, with all due respect, why would you say Randy Wayne is wrong for what he feels? He has good reason to feel like he does.

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This was the way that I have always experienced churches that were this way. There are always those in every congregation (unless the church is very small) that are not the most merciful, tactful, or gentle, and no matter how good their intentions, they can hurt people. This is why it is generally best for people to be mentored by those who bring them in. Often they are better acquainted with that person's situation, and is therefore the better to deal with it. Failing that, an older saint in the church is also a good choice as a rule (barring those who fulfill the proverb, 'there is no fool like an old fool').

This was the method that I have seen in churches all my life growing up, and this is the method that seems to me to work the best.

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Here is another life issue and a growing issue in America. Not as awful and dramatic as the first issue, but an issue that not too many people want to face. The Homeless.

There was a band of homeless people living in a small tent village under a bridge. A lot of issues were brought up because some of these people are caught in the throes of addiction and they did not want to abide by the rules of the Salvation Army. Those rules include no drugs and alcohol and the inhabitants must seek a job everyday. Once finding a job, they must pay the SA $5 a day to give back.

This sounds reasonable to me. But the homeless disagree. So the city evicted them from their homeplace under the bridge.

http://www.djournal.com/view/full_st...ter-in-Tupelo?

How can the Pentecostal church minister to these people as an outreach? There were many denominations who tried but failed to reach this particular group of people.

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I am somewhat surprised that Jay is the only minister to respond to how he would minister to people that experienced traumatic events in their life.

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The problem with this group of people (not always but as a rule) is that they do not wish to abide by any other lifestyle than the one that they have chosen. Because they do not wish to adapt of conform to another lifestyle, for whatever reason, and have no wish to change, it will be very hard to reach these people.

I have had my share of encounters with these types as they are always asking for money even while you are walking down the street. This is the reason that they are unreached. Too often they have no wish to be reached. Those that do, will be.

Preach!!!

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Would you keep trying to minister to them? Perhaps try to hold a bible study?

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I'm confused. Does a trip to the altar and baptism in Jesus' name make them whole, or not?

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I guess that I can only understand that ministers have no idea how to help traumatized victims? Or do they just want the easy job like telling men how to dress and women not to cut their hair or wear slacks. Some confuse preaching with bullying.

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There are people who suffer things that most people, pentecostal or not, find it difficult to relate to.

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The Bible doesn't present a Gospel void of loving fellowship and brotherhood, without which, healing will not take place for the hurting and dying-- even after they have done "everything else right."

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i have preached to these people for almost 3 years. You got to tell them and show them that they have Value. and God loves them.. Not all will care but some will. I have seen them on the verge of suicide I have seen them with nothing but the close on thier back, and watched them get a job get a place to stay.

Its hard its sickening to the stomach cause financial i cant really help them except talk to them about the local rescue mission. a place to stay for a few nights and get a change of clothes and some food.

i think all ministers would benifit from such a thing. cause you will get broken over their situation. you will shed tears with them, Feel their hurt.

I have been slacking this month with my blog, just been lazy but i have done a article on such a thing last month.

http://luke5-4.blogspot.com/2012/04/...e-them-do.html

God Bless

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May God Bless you acerrak for ministering to them. I find, being a female, that I may have to go a different route.

Some people within city government are angry over the way the eviction took place. Now nobody knows where they went. It's really a sad situation...and one that any number of us could find ourselves within their ranks at any time of our lives if it weren't for God.

New story today:
http://www.djournal.com/view/full_st...es_left_column

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I believe that one of the drawbacks of the UPCI was a lack of emphasis on quality education in counseling.
Also, many pastor's are reluctant to refer people to counseling.
As one who has been to Christian counseling sessions, I found them to be immensely helpful.
Our pastor's are trained to try to handle everything and sometime's it is better for them and for their church goers, if they do not.

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Thank you aegsm and I think you are absolutely correct. Counselors are trained to draw out the trauma so that the person can face it, then release it to God.

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I, too, tried to avoid reading the OP's attached article given the comments. But, I did it anyway.

Any time I hear about or read stories involving child abuse, a mix of anger and sadness seem to take over. I was never raised in a physically-abusive home. I will never relate to being hit, beaten, or tortured. However, I will advocate for that child 'til the end of time. No child, NO CHILD, deserves to be treated any less than a respected human being would wish to be treated.

As for the father who committed these terrible acts, no words can describe how glad I am for not being a part of the jury.

"'Me and my stick, we gonna have some fun'. Yeah, buddy, his prison friends are gonna have some fun with him. They're already waiting...

Re: Life Issues
 

Dagwood, I share those feelings.

I was more wondering how one would minister to these young boys. Say they grow up and in 10 years or more, they walk into a Pentecostal church seeking God and find Him. Yet, they have anger in their hearts over what happened and start acting upon displaced anger over someone else. It happens all the time and the abused do not even realize that they are acting out of displaced anger.

For every Tramelle, there are 10 others who grew up in silence and fear over their upbringing. Then they find themselves out of that prison only to find themselves to be imprisoned within their own minds. How can the church system counsel with them to help free them so that they can go on to be productive free people in Christ?

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Like we've heard it said many, may times. "These things just don't happen overnight." True. Abuse doesn't happen overnight. It happens over time. So will the healing it would take to notice even the slightest difference. For that matter, it may take an entire lifetime of Godly people interacting with someone who's been in an abusive situation.

Christian counseling is something I would highly recommend. I, too, have sought advice from one. And, what a difference it has made for sure! I think some pastors and churches run with the concept that only God can help someone, not a counselor. Well, I would dispute that. Christian counseling can oftentimes dig down much deeper than a pastor has the ability or willingness to do. So, why not jump on the opportunity when it becomes available? If a pastor or church frowns upon something like that, they're not interested in that person's healing. Rather, they're more interested in getting some kind of credit for knowing a person's business and claiming they helped them along.

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I have been in your shoes, except that there were NO christian counselors in my region and the pastor frowned upon any counseling. Heh. He couldn't help me, but frowned upon anybody else outside the church to help me?

That did not make sense to me.

I can say that as long as you have the desire to follow God, it doesn't matter who counsels you. I had a woman counselor who espoused New Age beliefs more than the Christian belief and she was wonderful! She respected my belief and brought new perspective to my thinking.

And you know what? The Holy Ghost was right there with me every counseling session, every step of the long road I had traveled. When I was sad, the Holy Ghost comforted me.

The church acted as though I had leprosy. Didn't see hide nor hair of them. They were afraid...of what? I don't know.

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It makes the pure in the sight of God, and many times the person will be made whole from that point forward. However, God does not always operate according to our time table, and therefore healing for some may take longer than for others. I know of many who were made whole instantly of the mental and emotional trauma. However, all were still marked by their experiences. A former soldier from the Vietnam war would not be around fireworks, a woman never forgot the pain of being abused, a man had to live with the reality of his past drug addiction, and many other issues. Just because someone might be healed does not eliminate the scars of the past. When dealing with young people, the scars and pain of such things are far closer to the surface than when they are after one becomes an adult. Therefore it may take time for the wounds to heal.