So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

I'm literally amazed.

So much hurt here. So much pain.

No, no one is posting it.

No, I'm not speaking to anyone in particular.

But I feel it in my spirit.

A lot of people, in fact I'll go as far to say most on this forum have been extremely hurt spiritually.

Spiritual Abuse is real folks. And I'm so sorry most of you have been mistreated and hurt by some ministers and pastors in the UPC.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Very, very true... but we are called to give those hurts up... walk in forgiveness, God's kind of forgiveness.... which also includes trying to forget and move forward... walking in grace... for others that isn't even extended back to us... to walk in mercy... that others won't even give an ounce back of...

Hurt is so very present, but we must acknowledge it, distance ourselves as far from it as possible as quickly as possible, ask God to fill it with his grace, mercy, love, and understanding.... hold on to him... and never allow bitterness to set up shop.

Hurt doesn't stay fresh very long... it soon spoils, and bitterness is the result.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

What the Gehenna!

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What happened?

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

It's a long story.
No use even getting into it.
Most was about salvation being based on hair and dress code, etc
The usual "works based salvation thing".

Enough said.
I am sure it has been covered in great lenght on this forum before.
:dogpat

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

For me it was about being raised by the church via my parents. Just like the "pod people".

This image symbolized what it was like perfectly!
http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6008/6...36f06e3c_z.jpg

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

I honestly can't claim spiritual "abuse"...we moved and started attending another church before the new pastor started getting cultish...but I have had dear friends that I reached for the Lord be hurt by pastors and "saints" as new babes in Christ and it destroyed them...that was like a knife in the back.Joe...what you see here are some people with the blinders off and that know the danger of placing people on pedestals.We all love Jesus....we just have issues with some of His followers.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

:highfive

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I have either been very lucky with the churches I have attended or I just realized that my pastors are men and not perfect.
I think I am on my 6th pastor, due to job moves, and regard all 6 as good, solid men.
I hold them in high esteem.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Bro Joe,

You are so right about the pain. I have had horrible intermittent pain in the little finger on my right hand for more than a week now. Today I decided to make a Dr.'s appointment next week to get it checked out. I kept hoping it would go away but it has not.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

:banghead

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

"Sigh"

As as pastor I have so much pain! You cannot believe the hurt that saints do to us in ministry.

I wish they would pray through and get the Holy Ghost.

But we persevere in spite of what they do or say.

That is what you are meaning right?

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Bro Joe,

Don't believe everything you are told by everyone.

Sure there are jerks that are UPC pastors, jerks who are WPF pastors, Independent Jerks, and PAW jerks who are pastors.

There are also great men who have jerks for saints and sometimes some of them get on here and vent.

Watch some and they will soon have trouble with their new pastor so.........

Joe..listen to this jack. He has a full head of gray hair, compliments of the saints!!!

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

That's not what he means. If people would allow the Spirit to lead there'd be less problems.

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Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

LOL!!!

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

I will be praying for y'all. I know some people have suffered a lot of pain. You may not see it, but all will be held accountable.

I really had to forgive, it took a while but I did. It wasn't the Pastor in my case.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

I think we all know people like that. Never satisfied at any church. They go to a new church and pretty soon they are offended and leave to find another church. Others just stop going to church all together because they find 'problems" at every church they move to.

We probably have some of each here. Some who have been hurt and driven from God by "bad" pastors, and others who are just malcontents, murmurers, complainers, troublemakers, tale bearers, etc

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

not that they would "get the Holy Ghost" but that He would "get them."

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

No, that's not what I was meaning.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Honestly, I've been told nothing.

I was referring to, as Jeff Arnold would so eloquently put, "For those of you that are on your legalistic journey into stupid-ville."

Sure.

Okay.

Love you Bro.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Thank you for pointing that out as well, sis.

It's not always the Pastor or ministers that deeply wound their people.

Sometimes it's the so called saints.

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Those kind of people never fully understand that the Church is made up of...well, people.

Offenses will come.

I'm thankful for thicker skin.

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That's very nice of you to say, Bro Joe. I'll just say it. I and many others here have been extremely hurt spiritually.

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For me it isn't about forgiveness (done and done) so much as never EVER letting myself in the same situation that I was in before on account of being a teenager and not having any say at the time. I am an adult now and will never bow to another spiritual Führer and even subtly welcome meeting more "pod people" since I am now legally able to give them the old "what fer".

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

RW,

I will never bow to another Fuhrer either and sometimes that gets me in trouble on my job. ;)

Do you feel that your experiences/feelings now, of feeling the need to keep that wall up make you feel isolated? Sometimes, I just wish I could let that wall down and be a "believer" but it was never worth it the first time. Sometimes I think "Oh, I could be part of a community (and be tortured). I could have something that I was a part of (and have a bunch of demands made of me). I could be a part of like-minded (robotic) believers.

Ugh.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

:shockamoo

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Some, not all...

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I will always have that wall up. It really comes from two sources: My experiences with the "pod people" as well as the (unfortunately) unique ability to see through emotionalism and see "where the beef is". My depression has made me what I am today and given me the capability of NOT being influenced by a "Rah! Rah!" artist. Honestly, no motivational speaker has ever made me feel better, even temporarily UNLESS they had some real substance to say. The good news is is that it has kept me from feeling good and going to Vegas and ultimately having to sell my hair to a wig shop.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Yes....my favorite passive agressive technique for getting worship started is comparing what people are doing out in the world for sports teams ect....yeah....that just kinda is a wet blanket to me...I know how to worship and it doesn't require any cheerleading from anyone...in fact...I prefer to do it alone...in my vehicle...vacuuming a floor...just by myself me and God....and yes its emotional...its a feeling of breaking inside and a release....but nothing that can be compared to a football game...I don't like the feeling of being pressured to do anything...I feel like it isn't genuine when its like that and im just doing it because someone says so yes I've struggled with depression quite a bit as well and it DOES have a way of emotionally grounding you to what's real and genuine at times...sorry...just responding to a part of RW's post...just kinda sparked something...and im feelin cruddy and out of it...ugh.

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Depression...a tough taskmaster that I think even God uses at times. I believe Bro Barnes referred to it as his 'dark companion' because he dealt with it so often. I've been there myself. For about a two year period it, combined with health problems, flattened me. It wasn't clinical, it was more spiritual I believe. But I wouldn't take anything for it, God taught me so many lessons, even my preaching was made different and better (I think). In my prayer there is almost always some desperation in there. You can't let it beat you. The cross of Calvary is the ladder out of that dark pit.

Will, the sports prompting, I never liked it either - except where I live now (B'Ham, AL). The Alabama Crimson Tide and Nick Saban are the gods here. Folks all but get on their knees and do obeisance. I grew up in SEC country, but when I moved here it was shocking the hold Bama footbaoll has on EVERYTHING. I've not gotten jobs because I was an Arkansas fan (raised there). I thought I was going to have to buy a stupid houndstooth tie and hat to get a job when I was looking for work. Using that as a motivator, you are right - a little bit manipulation. But here it's completely justified.

Speaking of depression, Randy, Will, you should listen to Jeff Arnold's message (HE knows about depression) 'Coming Out of Your Cave'. Great message dealing with it.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

Not in any way trying to make light of anyone's pain, but,
won't we be without excuse when we come before God?
I know some folks who totally fall out of church and begin
to doubt and then begin using their painful episodes as
reasons to never go back or try again.

I think not one of us has ever experienced anything like
so many (who call themselves Christian) in this world, are
having to deal with. We all have suffered some sort of
offense in living for God. I refuse to let someone get in
my way or bring me down. There are good churches to be
part of. There are good Pastors to lead. The devil is
still a liar.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

LOL

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Jeremiah dealt with depression as well...and yes...I feel that it is God orchestrated and not something that is a hindrance....it leaves you as Elijah*or Elisha...tired sleepy n can't think* But instead of coming out of the cave for the fire...or the wind...or the earthquake...you recognize legitimacy when you hear it....where others would get caught up in the previous things notice where it says that God wasn't in them....he WAS however in that still small voice...and in our caves...feeling alone...insignificant and surrounded by our enemy when we get to the place where we recognize and hear that voice that's when we wrap our faces in our mantle and step out and talk with Him.....it has been in those alone times....where I break inside...when I feel alone in the crowd...that's when I've had my greatest encounters that have put me on my face in the floor weeping.

Re: So Much Hurt On This Forum
 

you just contridicted yourself,... if they are saints then they already have the Holy ghost.... maybe that is the issue

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I love the church...I love the alters of the church...i love what the church represents however as humans we are all just that.... humans...we must pray and seek God for ourselves... we should never have to be ruled or subject to some Hitler type person. While we don't want to become church hoppers and we must all realize there is NO perfect church or pastor...we can with an open mind and a praying heart seek a spiritual anchor and refuge for our souls and our families.
I have had to walk away from relationships because I felt they were abusive and thought they owned us because of a missionary offering....I have lost supporters because I may not fit in their little homemade boxes.....however I refuse to bow down to some things...

I will do my best to be nice and kind as far as possible but a few times have had to walk away...

I want to be right with the Lord and have a right spirit. (I often fail) however some people are just not healthy to be around....some think they own heaven and have God on their little string and only their church saves...the other church across town that preaches almost the same thing is tainted and dark...

I feel deeply sorry for my friend Randy Wayne...so kind, so sweet but was driven ...and thus he suffers in his spirit....when will be ever learn NOT to drive people, but lead them?

Jesus our example sorry to say would not be welcome in some of the churches that SEEM to have it all together...for he was a friend to sinners, talked with the children and had women disciples following him...His clothes would be laughed at. His sermons would be mocked...HOWEVER it is HIS love and compassion that reaches to us all today....the condemning Pharisees that stood on the corners condemning built nothing lasting for eternity...they run the sinners away...

Do I believe something? Of course I do...hundreds of pictures on this forum alone shows that...a lifetime of service....however when we begin to think of ourselves higher than a servant we have got it all wrong....We are called to serve and point others to the healer, the savior...
We are not gods walking around or Jesus in the flesh as some preach...we are just workers together with Him...

When people get a high elevated opinion of themselves that is when they decide they are Jesus in the flesh....