Craziest things you witnessed in church?
 

What are the kookiest/weirdest/craziest things you witnessed when you were in church?

There was one time a girl came to church with makeup on. Her eye was a little irritated and an older woman came over to lecture her about how god was punishing her because she had on makeup. :shifty She then looked over at me as if i should agree with her. Of course i politely excused myself. One of many awkward moments at Upc.

Another time a woman came back from the bathroom and begin to tell some sisters how she was so thankful God gave her bowel movements......ummmm yeah......could have kept that testimony to yourself.:blush

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An elderly man was kneeling and praying at an altar bench, another man started shouting, fell on him and I think broke his nose. Blood was everywhere.

A few men were making 'Holy Ghost laps' around the church when a small child stepped out from between the pew and got trampled. I'm not sure if the child was seriously hurt or not, I quickly left.

Lights went out during service and folks went into a 'Holy Ghost prayer meeting mode', it was kinda spooky, but the lights soon came back on so who knows.

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oh goodness! I could go on and on and on with crazy things i've seen happen in the church. Maybe tomorrow :)

One quick funny tho --- back in the 70's when the guys in the world were letting their hair grow, a young man came to church one night. He ended up at the altar - well, actually he was kneeling at the front pew with his back to the people. Very earnestly seeking God. One of the sweet older ladies in the church, a real prayer warrior, came up behind him and laid her hands on his head and started praying VERY loudly, "Bless HER, Lord! Fill HER, Lord!"

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Lol

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The Gospel message being preached, and people actually being borned again. Can you imagine that? in church even!

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:thumbsup

1 Corinthians 1:21 KJV

For after that in the wisdom of God the world
by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the
foolishness of preaching to save them that believe.

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I can share two, the first one, we had an older gentleman come to preach a service for us one night, He had worked himself into a good tizzy and was really preaching Hell hot and Heaven sweet when his dentures decided to dislodge from his mouth and run away!!

My second, I was teaching a small group bible study on a Wednesday evening, It was summer so of course I was in shorts. Well, I had lost weight since the previous summer and my shorts were all too big. When we finished up the lesson and stood for prayer my shorts decided not to stand with me.

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Craziest?

Would this qualify? LOL

http://i174.photobucket.com/albums/w...rHairMST3K.jpg

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:snapout

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Oh my... that had to be the judgments of the Lord for wearing shorts to church! :heeheehee :laffatu

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I myself have heard someone speak about this very thing... they were a lot older than me at the time, and I just chalked it up to the "getting old" stuff... :lol

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Visiting a new church for the first time, we entered with one of the church members, her name was Mary. After the service, an elderly man came up to my husband and I. I thought he said, “Are you kin to Mary?” I answered “No, we are just friends.” He then pointed to our kids, and said, “Oh, well… are those your kids?” And I said “Yes”. He just shook his head and looked at us strangely and said, “If you need to tie the knot, let me know, I’ll help you out.” My husband and I looked at each other, and then suddenly, we both realized where we went wrong… I thought he had said “Are you kin to Mary” but he had said “Are you kids married?” I had answered no. Poor guy. He’s probably still shaking his head and hoping he gets a chance to marry us… :lol

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may I ask....what is this lady doing?

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One night during the middle of service, a lady walked in....strolled down to the very front, stood in front of the pulpit, pulled off her shoes , held them high over her head and began screaming...."We are on holy ground"......needless to say, she screamed that al the way out the door with the ushers trying to escort her out. She later came back and got saved...but she would still take her shoes off during church. :-?

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One time, this woman stood up, interrupting the pastor's sermon, and started talking unintelligibly, and loud! Random syllables, strung together. Made no sense. But that's not all! The weirdest thing was when she was done, someone else stood up and spouted random things in English!

:heeheehee

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Come to think of it, this happened more than once! :lol

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Waving her "long uncut hair" over an offering plate in order to bless the offering.

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:hmmm:oops

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I always thought the pastor prayed over it or one of the ushers who was taking up the offering????? I have never seen or heard of anything like this...EVER! :nah

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Some women lay hair on sick people to heal them.

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practicing witchcraft.

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preached at a place today, one of the elders smelled of feces. kinda crazy.

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very heartbreaking. Old people are often neglected....very sad:(

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One night we had an evangelist preaching. He got up beside the pulpit, took his shoes off, jumped up on the altar rail and then started to walk the backs of the pews starting at the front and moving all the way to the back of the church, then turning around and coming back to the front - all on the backs of the pews. I'm still not sure what point he was trying to make by doing that.

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That was stupid.

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A pastor friend of mine was preaching a message about taking Jesus home with you, based on the story of Zacchaeus.....he came to a point in the message where he asked one of those rhetorical questions NO ONE is supposed to respond to......."As Jesus came down the road, he looked up into the sycamore tree and what do think he saw?" as he paused for emphasis sake in that moment of silence a little downs syndrome boy hollered out real loud "IT WAS A WABBIT....HE SAW A WABBIT".....needless to say; the message was pretty much over and everybody left with a lot of smiles that day.

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We had a lady evangelist preaching at our church where I grew up that was notorious for getting her tongue all tied up and saying something that wasn't supposed to be said. here are a couple of them (all done within a 4 week revival.)

1. While preaching one night she said the Lord has been dealing with me on a message entitled "Why in the hell would you want to the world for." Only a few of us caught it and she managed to keep going until after service when we all had a good laugh at her expense.

2. A few nights later she was preaching about the Lord being our shield and protector against the diery farts of the wicked........several of us lost it and had to go out to keep from permanently disrupting the service.

3. She did the whole Lot pinched his ...... toward Sodom thing......and just like the video of the youth pastor that is on youtube she probably would have been fine if she had just moved right on.......but she tried to correct it three times and all three times she got it wrong........by the third time everyone was rolling and she hastened to the altar call.

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I knew a man who did that!

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Oh Lord help us! The more the stories keep coming, the more I keep walking down memory lane... many years ago a native Austrian with a strong Germanic accent, was helping out at the church we were attending.

On a Sunday evening, he was doing the announcements and getting ready to begin his message. He was announcing that food would be served in the fellowship hall after church. He meant to say, meet us after church in the fellowship hall for food, fun, and fortification. Instead of the word fortification, he said "food, fun and fornication" :lol Oh my. You could've heard a pin drop at first, and then you could hear chuckles all over the building. He stood up there completely confused, and really thought we were just laughing at him, I think. He had no idea what he had just said! Needless to say... EVERYONE met after church to see what was going to happen with that fellowship!!! :happydance

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We had a couple come to visit one night in the little country church I went to. The pastor knew she played piano and sang, so he asked if she would like to share a song and a testimony with us. She agreed and walked up to the piano. She sat down, thought about it for just a minute and promptly started to bang really loud on the piano, singing at the top of her voice, "God's Gonna Getcha For That". I had to walk out because I was laughing so hard!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVJrkG4uU-g

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LOL!!!! :toofunny: