Why You Should Vote IN FAVOR of Resolution 4
 

Why You Should Vote FOR Resolution Four

I know this will come as a shock, but after much consideration, I have come to the conclusion that voting in favor of resolution four (advertising on television) is in the best interest of the United Pentecostal Church. I will do my best to enumerate the reasons succinctly and straightforwardly.

1. Passing this resolution will bring unity. It has become obvious that those who have continued to vote against this measure are dividing this organization. On more than one occasion, they have said a resounding, “NO!” to what a number of other men dearly want. Their continued stand for what has been is evidently the cause of extreme divisiveness and animosity. They should stop standing in the way of “progress” and allow this fellowship to make this bold new move. By doing so, they will bring unity to the body, thus resulting in unprecedented endtime revival.

2. Passing this resolution will provide an easier method of evangelism. I, for one, am tired of knocking doors. I mean, how many churches have been built by such antiquated methods? Let’s be real – putting together a television ad (or, better yet, a program) will enable me to reach MILLIONS of people. Since the majority of the world has televisions, my ad/program will be all the world needs to start flocking to the UPCI in droves. I can have more free time, since I will no longer have to devote my Saturday mornings to other more ineffective methods of evangelism. In fact, we might as well recall the missionaries. Let the FMD put together ads in the various languages of the world and put them over the airwaves. People will undoubtedly be receiving the Holy Ghost during the time these things air. Since receiving the Holy Ghost is the main focus, by the way, that’s all they need. The Spirit will then lead them into the rest of the truth.

3. Passing this resolution will save us money. In light of the facts presented in the previous paragraph, I won’t have to spend money on things like fliers, door hangers, Bible study charts, OR missionaries! I have been told that cable advertising is as cheap as – or cheaper than – radio. Thus, it is obviously a wise monetary decision to stop wasting church funds on things that are not reaching the world. A few dollars more wisely spent on television advertising/programming will be the last thing I will EVER need to spend money on – it will reach the WORLD!

4. Passing the resolution will purge the organization of unwanted and unnecessary members. We’ve all heard the “whiners” – “If you don’t play by the rules that have you’ve always used, we’re taking our toys and going home.” By voting in favor of this resolution, these people will either “put up or shut up.” Furthermore, I was personally told by a top official of this organization that we “don’t need” men who oppose the progressive agenda of the modern era. We are “better off without them,” he said to me. Far be it from me to be a weakening factor in the strength of this movement. By helping to pass this resolution, I will be able to walk away with my head held high, knowing I am making the UPCI better by my absence.

Well, there you have it. These are the reasons why I am encouraging everyone to vote in favor of resolution four.

By the way, I’m not being sarcastic. However, I have written this with my tongue planted firmly in my cheek.

Are you needing a little attention this morning KP, feeling a little lonely way out there in Kansas?:driving:driving

sar·casm http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/premium.gif http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/speaker.gif (sär'kāz'əm) Pronunciation Key
n.

1. A cutting, often ironic remark intended to wound.
2. A form of wit that is marked by the use of sarcastic language and is intended to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule.
3. The use of sarcasm.

sarcasm


A form of irony in which apparent praise conceals another, scornful meaning. For example, a sarcastic remark directed at a person who consistently arrives fifteen minutes late for appointments might be, “Oh, you've arrived exactly on time!”

37.(with) tongue in cheek, ironically or mockingly; insincerely.

www.dictionary.com

It's sad when people can't make a decent appeal and have to resort to these sort of methods that serve more to get a back slap or high five by others of likemindedness than to actually defeat someone else argument and show the the truth.

It's no wonder there is so much disunity....there has always been differences with unity.

Do the preachers' wives get to vote? Or at least influence the vote?

I wonder how many of these wives of pro-tv UPC preachers have realized that ALL televangelists have mistresses.

This whole thing is just stupid.

ALL? LOL!

I can't think of any television evangelists that I really support, but I can't see lumping them all together like that either.

Maybe if the UPC did open up to TV ministry I would be able to find a tele-evangelist I could support.

Hey, it was all in fun.

Wordnet defines "tongue-in-cheeK" as "cleverly amusing in tone."

The American Heritage dictionary defines it as "ironically or facetiously."

"Facetious" is defined as "1. not meant to be taken seriously or literally; 2. amusing; humorous."

Believe it or not, there was nothing hateful intended by my post.

KP, nice satirical thread! :thumbsup

Keep in mind that there is nothing in the resolution REQUIRING any church to quit buying the door hangers and tracts to hand out to the masses!

Hey...this was effective in the 50's and 60's, so I don't see why it wouldn't be effective today!

Nobody is required to use billboards, newspaper, radio, magazines, internet or TV to advertise because we all know that these forms of advertisement also have beer and/or cigarette ads also! Some may not want to be associated with the world in any way!

Door hangers and tracts RULE!!!!!!!! :D

This stupid TV crud dont' mean jack to the average ordinary individual. Nobody gives a hoot about it except for the political-minded goobers.

:crazy

You speak the truth! Since the world has not changed since the beginning of the 50's I think door knocking works. Unless you are one of the people that get a gun pulled on you then it might be a different world after all. PM, you your satirical statment is perfect. I remember jsut before joining our church in Knoxville the pasto put up a large billboard with a somewhat cheesy slogan. "It's a great day at Apostolic Church,' with his face on the billboard. The billboard was an advertisment for the broadcast. That was 20+ yrs ago and the slogan is still what we are known for. It worked for them.

I think that door knocking or meeting face to face is the most effective form or outreach. Though I think it is much easier if you have a repore with the person to lead them to Him. This is as oppose to meeting someone in the store and telling them they need the HG they might call the cops. I know you will agree...this is a totally different world and must be approached differently!

You have Malvaro's stamp of approval.... :tiphat

:D