[Malvaro]

Originally Posted by Pastor Poster

1. Is this relationship worth the amount of work required to maintain it?
   
   if you are only willing to maintain friendships based on how much work it costs you, your considerations are selfish. Many friendships, at times, require time and effort to make them work.
   
2. Does this person make me feel good about myself? Am I uncomfortable around them?
   
   Some of the best friends a person could have are willing to step on your toes. I'd be leary of "friends" that only make me feel good about myself. If you want groupies, start a rock band. It's unfair to set that expectation on any of your "supposed friends". Do they make you feel uncomfortable? As in their words, actions, etc being un-Christian.... then yah, thats a different story....
   
3. Is this friend competitive with me in a negative way?
   
   Some competition can be healthy: losing weight, reading books/study, etc.... it would depend on what type of competition, I suppose.
   
4. Do I like who I am when I’m with them? Or do we seem to bring out the worst in each other?
   
   A realistic point to consider. Are you a better person around them. Or worse?
   
5. How deeply can I trust this person? Could I count on them if I needed to? Could I share my feelings freely?
   
   An exclusive level of complete trust shouldn't be a requirement of all friendships.... but if you can't trust them, thats a completely different story.... I've posted Mal's Three Levels of Trust somewhere on AFF.... you should go find it....
   
6. Do we have common interests and values? If not, do I benefit from the differences?
   
   "do I benefit"??? Again, selfishness showing it's ugly head again.... you won't benefit from all friendships, nor should you.... sometimes you need to be a friend to an unfriendly/unpopular person.... again, I've posted about the Three Types of People of Life on AFF.... go find it....
   
7. Am I receiving as much as I give?
   
   Again, selfishness showing it's ugly head again.... you won't always get what you put into a friendship all the time.... there are some people who will never be able to give back to you what you put into them....
   
8. If I gave this relationship the effort it deserves, would it benefit me and enrich my life?
   
   This is a "Me First" society.... it's not always about you and what you can get and how you can be enriched and how you can be helped.... sometimes its about what you can do for others, with no expectation of receiving anything back....

PastorPoster, I certainly hope this isn't an original work.... and that you just copied it off some Dr. Phil self-help e-zine or something like that.... Selfishness and carnality permiate the core of the above list....