Help! Tormented dreams

[jediwill83]

1. Noticing a presence as in someone watching you.
Its usually my toddler
2. A heaviness or fearfulness in a certain room of your home.
any bathroom I just left
3. Sensing a cold spot in a room or cold feeling on part or all of your physical body.
right in front of the AC
4. Feeling someone touch you when you are all alone or no one nearby.
again....my toddler
5. A burning sensation at the upper back just below the nape of your neck, potentially accompanied by the feeling of tingling.
its called sunburn...this is the South...its a thing.
6. Sensing frightening Shadows from the corner of your eyes.
Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of men? The Shadow knows!!!
7. Behavior and personality changes.
Im married to a woman....its a thing.
8. A loss of self-esteem and/or self-confidence.
Im massively overweight...its a thing
9. Recurrent or frequent nightmares, such as unwanted sexual experiences, being raped, tormented, or tortured.
Oh Lord....I hear banjos...paddle faster
10. Major changes in clarity of thinking or analytical ability.
could be stress,fatigue,low blood sugar or illness
11. Memory lapses.
Hey.Did I ever tell yall that we make candles ?
12. A drained feeling or fatigue without cause, as in a drain of vitality or physical strength.
typically felt during a visit from my MIL
13. Hearing harassing voices inside your mind, as in negative words, demoralizing and degrading you, and suggesting you do things you do not wish to do.
those voices usually say things like,change this poopy diaper and dont whine about the smell.
14. Illnesses that come on suddenly that a doctor cannot diagnose.
my MIL is either a very bad cook,or a very good assassin.
15. Sudden illnesses that cannot be explained, as in flu-like symptoms, headache, low-vibrational trauma inside your body.
literal flu with my phone set on vibrate trapped in a fat roll.
16. Hallucinations.
Ha! Thats silly. Well Im off to pet that unicorn!
17. Inability to sleep well without having to take sleep aids.
Sleep AIDS....is that what I get when I use Charlie Sheens pillow?
18. Waking up in the middle of the night sensing someone in the room.
Like Jesus?
19. Sleep-walking, conversations, or other actions during sleep that you cannot remember upon waking.
Yeah, explained easily by science.

20. Difficulty coping with the routine of everyday life.

who tha heck has a routine life???
21. Sudden explicable inability to cope with responsibilities, such as hardship at work doing what used to be easy.
its called burnout....its a thing
22. Depression without understanding why or knowing an apparent cause, and becoming chronic.
ive been depressed from the lack of chronic but yet to have my depression to become chronic.
23. Sudden bouts of sorrow, sadness, fear, or dread without explanation.
yeah...it means your mask is slipping and all the things youve avoided dealing with in life is overwhelming your ability to hide it.
24. Feeling trapped or helpless for no apparent reason.
theres always a reason...
25. Intrusive negative thoughts that insight feelings of anger, rage, or the desire to inflict physical violence upon yourself or others.
have you never seen Teletubbies????
26. Compulsive immoral behaviors that fill you with feelings of shame, guilty, and condemnation.
I really should stop Dutch Ovening my wife...
27. Feeling isolated, and even wanting to be isolated.
yep...cause Im a introvert...I like my solitude
28. Anxiety or unexplainable disinterest relating to attending religious worship or activities.
usually kicks in when people try to turn church into a pep rally
29. Feelings of fear or dread when preparing to read your Bible.
nope
30. Sudden dislike for religious music.

yep...cant stand the McKaymys