Only in America

[Rev]

1.. Only in America..... .can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

2. Only in America..... .are there handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.

3. Only in America..... .do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people
can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America..... .do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a DIET coke.

5. Only in America..... .do banks leave both vault doors open and then
chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America..... .do we use answering machines to screen calls
and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we
didn't want to talk to in the first place.

7. Only in America..... .do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
in packages of eight.

8. Only in America..... .do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'

9. Only in America..... .do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille
lettering.