Have you ever dealt with a spirit of fear?
Last night, I was having a hard time. After going to bed quite late, as I was drifting off to sleep, I kept having strange 'visions' (they weren't dreams yet, just things that go on in your mind as you drift off) of scenes like, waking up to someone slashing my throat, someone killing my kids, and things like that.
I tossed and turned for a few minutes, trying to get those things out of my head and thinking of better things....
And I hear a noise in my living room. Sounds like someone opened a screen.
I jump up, heart pounding, and listen. Nothing. I turn the hall light on and peek in the living room. I have a cat who, if someone was there, would have ran for cover, but there he is, just looking at me.
Ok. So I go back to bed. I am laying there, trying to calm down when I hear a man's voice talking low. It's almost like a TV or radio is on. I have a fan in my bedroom window to help drown out background sounds, as I have cats who like to play all night, but they can't talk. Not like that.
Again, I get up and there's nothing going on. I live sorta in the country so there isn't anyone walking around outside or anything. There aren't even cars driving down the street. My kids are both sleeping and no radios or TV are on. I'd turned the living room TV off when I went to bed.
I laid back down and several times my eyes just popped open, believing that I was hearing things. I didn't get back up, but considered not going to sleep at all until this morning. I finally did go to sleep somewhere about 2:30am.
This isn't the first time something like this has happened. Not long ago, I was just getting to sleep when I 'felt' a presence in my bedroom. I didn't open my eyes because I was afraid of what I'd see, but I could feel it. I also felt my blanket moving as if someone was taking it off me, and at that point, I opened my eyes.
Nothing. My blanket wasn't moved and nobody was there. But I wasn't dreaming. I was fully aware of what was going on.
As I finally drifted off, I kept repeating the verse about God not giving us the spirit of fear, and that fear is not of God. I silently rebuked that spirit, perhaps the reason why I finally went to sleep. And I had a restful sleep, albeit a short one.
How does one deal with this, and has anyone ever dealt with this on a long-term basis? I can deal with a lot of things, but being scared isn't something I take very well.
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