Since the heart is only known by God, how can we be SURE?

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by Subdued

I see your point, too, PO. I guess I'm referring more to learned behavior than personality traits.

I agree, too, that some people are unable to get past it as you wrote above. But that does not remove the fact that it is their responsibility as an adult to continue to TRY to change their negative and/or sinful behavior, manner, talk, thoughts, whatever. Once they're adults, can they really continue to blame their parents? If so, who can their parents blame? The grandparents? What about them? The great-grandparents? On and on it goes.

I think each adult ultimately becomes responsible for their OWN actions. My step-dad often told me, "Well, that's how my dad raised me," or "That's what my dad always said (or did) to me." I guess I could take the same route - I could criticize and ridicule and rule over my children and blame it on my step-dad, since that's what he did to me. I don't, though; because I know it's wrong.

Does that make sense??

Sure, it makes sense. Fortunately you found a better way.

My point would be dealing with those who, as yet, have not found a better way. The guy in Rico's story was unable to grasp a better way and therefore Rico walked away from him.

So, Rico recognized the guy had learned behavior and knew he wasn't going to change him, so he walked away.

[Subdued]

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

Sure, it makes sense. Fortunately you found a better way.

My point would be dealing with those who, as yet, have not found a better way. The guy in Rico's story was unable to grasp a better way and therefore Rico walked away from him.

So, Rico recognized the guy had learned behavior and knew he wasn't going to change him, so he walked away.

My opinion is that the guy in Rico's post is entirely and solely responsible for his OWN behavior, though. There may be a reason this guy exhibited the behavior he did; but I don't buy that as a legitimate excuse. The man is an adult. I don't believe for one second that he hasn't heard from somewhere that racism is wrong or bad or improper. (I believe the issue was racism - hope I'm remembering correctly.) The man won't change, because he won't change. We're not animals - we're humans. Humans have self-control, we just don't always use it. That man could choose not to open his mouth, despite how he feels inside about other races. He didn't make the right decision -- I blame him, not his father.

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by Subdued

My opinion is that the guy in Rico's post is entirely and solely responsible for his OWN behavior, though. There may be a reason this guy exhibited the behavior he did; but I don't buy that as a legitimate excuse. The man is an adult. I don't believe for one second that he hasn't heard from somewhere that racism is wrong or bad or improper. (I believe the issue was racism - hope I'm remembering correctly.) The man won't change, because he won't change. We're not animals - we're humans. Humans have self-control, we just don't always use it. That man could choose not to open his mouth, despite how he feels inside about other races. He didn't make the right decision -- I blame him, not his father.

Yes, Subdued you are right. He can't blame anyone else.

The whole point of Rico's story is - He could not change the man and so he walked away.

He wasn't standing there psychoanalyzing his learned behavior.

Gotta run! Have a great day!

[Subdued]

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

Yes, Subdued you are right. He can't blame anyone else.

The whole point of Rico's story is - He could not change the man and so he walked away.

He wasn't standing there psychoanalyzing his learned behavior.

Gotta run! Have a great day!

I approve of how Rico handled it, BTW, FWIW. LOL

I only responded because it appeared as though the man was being given an excuse for his behavior, with which I disagreed.

Seems the issue is settled between you and I now. Good! haha...

Catch ya later!

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by Subdued

I approve of how Rico handled it, BTW, FWIW. LOL

I only responded because it appeared as though the man was being given an excuse for his behavior, with which I disagreed.

Seems the issue is settled between you and I now. Good! haha...

Catch ya later!

I'm not sure I saw that anyone was excusing him. Just understanding that Rico had no other alternative than to walk away because he understood the man had some issues - learned behavior. Which means - he knew he wasn't going to change him and tanning his hide wasn't going to do it either. Too bad, though. J/K!!!!

Yes, we have settled it - no excuses for the bad boy!

Okay, I'm out. I hate fixing my hair!!!! Talk at you later!!!

[Rico]

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

I'm not sure I saw that anyone was excusing him. Just understanding that Rico had no other alternative than to walk away because he understood the man had some issues - learned behavior. Which means - he knew he wasn't going to change him and tanning his hide wasn't going to do it either. Too bad, though. J/K!!!!

Yes, we have settled it - no excuses for the bad boy!

Okay, I'm out. I hate fixing my hair!!!! Talk at you later!!!

I promise you I really wanted to!!!

[Rico]

Originally Posted by Subdued

I approve of how Rico handled it, BTW, FWIW. LOL

I only responded because it appeared as though the man was being given an excuse for his behavior, with which I disagreed.

Seems the issue is settled between you and I now. Good! haha...

Catch ya later!

A reason is not an excuse, Subdued. Bro X was a bigot because he learned it from his dad. He stayed a bigot of his own free will, but he learned it from his dad. Prejudice is a very difficult thing to uproot. It's one of those "only God can fix it" things.