Quote:
Originally Posted by rgcraig
That you have to be very careful because if you can confide in that friend about things you can't talk to your spouse about that it could open the door for problems in a marriage.
You could find yourself saying, "I wish (spouse) was more like you"........resulting in an emotional attachment to someone outside your marraige.
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Indeed... my wife was once met with anger from the ladies in a church we attended because she would not speak ill of me amongst them. We don't speak ill of one another to others.
But all of these girls were married and they would daily talk to each other about how terrible their husband was and how terrible he did them. Now... I am sure that they had a few valid arguments but the only thing their daily husband mill was doing is strengthening themselves together in a solidarity against their husbands.
It was making things worse in their minds and making them feel an us against them mentality.
EVERY one of those women is now divorced.
I was so very proud of my wife for the stand she made... it has been one of the defining positions we hold in our marriage.
When we have a problem with one another than we discuss that... between ourselves... and we work it out. If something ever came up that we could not work out then we might go and speak to an outside counsel but, even that, we would do together.
People don't understand how such seemingly small actions can re-arrange the feelings in their heart to a place that can be nearly irreparable.
Hybrid Mode
