Sex Scenes

[MrsMcD]

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

Don't you think it's on a different level with different men?

I do but then again, I think some men are more honest about their struggle. Maybe if some men were to tell their wife, their true thoughts and struggles, she wouldn't understand. idk jmho

[MissBrattified]

I don't believe this is "every man's battle", and I don't think I'm being naive. Some men struggle in this area, others struggle in other areas. We all have similar issues with the flesh, but we don't all have the exact same triggers.

As far as looking at other women goes--I've never been bothered if my husband notices a pretty woman. If he didn't, I would think he was just pretending just to make me happy, and he doesn't need to do that. If he stared or leered at a woman in a lascivious way, that would be one thing, but to just notice, and say, "She's really pretty"--I'm likely to just agree with him and move on. I think women who overreact to their husbands noticing a beautiful woman are just plain silly. Unless your husband has given you tangible reason to distrust his motives and actions, then let it go. Men are going to notice beautiful women. As long as they keep that a "notice" and don't let it mature into "lusting", there's not a problem. I would differentiate between noticing beauty and lusting by saying: When you imagine the woman you noticed naked, or yourself with the woman you're noticing, that's lust.

That said. I know my husband and I know that he's going to be turned on by graphic sex scenes--at least some of them. Ergo, I DON'T want him to watch them, and out of respect I wouldn't rent a movie that had something in it that would be a stumbling block for him.

[MrsMcD]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

I don't believe this is "every man's battle", and I don't think I'm being naive. Some men struggle in this area, others struggle in other areas. We all have similar issues with the flesh, but we don't all have the exact same triggers.

As far as looking at other women goes--I've never been bothered if my husband notices a pretty woman. If he didn't, I would think he was just pretending just to make me happy, and he doesn't need to do that. If he stared or leered at a woman in a lascivious way, that would be one thing, but to just notice, and say, "She's really pretty"--I'm likely to just agree with him and move on. I think women who overreact to their husbands noticing a beautiful woman are just plain silly. Unless your husband has given you tangible reason to distrust his motives and actions, then let it go. Men are going to notice beautiful women. As long as they keep that a "notice" and don't let it mature into "lusting", there's not a problem. I would differentiate between noticing beauty and lusting by saying: When you imagine the woman you noticed naked, or yourself with the woman you're noticing, that's lust.

That said. I know my husband and I know that he's going to be turned on by graphic sex scenes--at least some of them. Ergo, I DON'T want him to watch them, and out of respect I wouldn't rent a movie that had something in it that would be a stumbling block for him.

Exactly!

I would think my husband was gay if he didn't notice beautiful women. lol

[rgcraig]

And....just notice a beautiful woman is NOT a battle. It's normal. The battle is when they want to be with them.

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

And....just notice a beautiful woman is NOT a battle. It's normal. The battle is when they want to be with them.

My husband has SUCH a battle I have to put a chastity belt in his lunch bucket. AND I heard our local mall is passing them out - for free!!!

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

My husband has SUCH a battle I have to put a chastity belt in his lunch bucket. AND I heard our local mall is passing them out - for free!!!

I heard that one Victoria Secrets had to be closed down to get rid of bed bugs. Really. It was on the NBC news - lol!!!!! I thought of all the stores......

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

I heard that one Victoria Secrets had to be closed down to get rid of bed bugs. Really. It was on the NBC news - lol!!!!! I thought of all the stores......

I read about that!! Pants on the ground!!!!!

[Pressing-On]

Speaking of movies. I just received the BBC version of Emma with Romola Garai! Totally well done!!!!! No nudity or language.

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Socialite

So you define it differently.

The ability to make it brief (as your wife appreciated) is part of that battle. It's not always a conscious sweat match with white knuckles.

I've used the word battle, and described every man varying in degree. Same susceptibility.

(Hopefully you're just as quick returning your glance when the wifey isn't on your arm! )

I don't "make it brief" because I feel it it is wrong, but more as a courtesy to her. That is not to say that I would watch with tongue hanging out making the Lenny & Squiggy kissing faces and groping motions with my hand if she wasn't there, but the thought that this is a "battle" is to declare the very nature of man (not the built in "sin" nature but the way God created us period) a sin.

[crakjak]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

I agree with you, but I wouldn't include graphic sex scenes in the category of "appropriate exposure."

Fathers are very important, and I think the way THEY react to sexual images or even scantily clad women (or mannequins in the Victoria's Secret window) is more influential longterm. They're sending their kids messages about the appropriate way to react.

If a man sees a scantily clad woman and reacts with disgust and disrespect, he teaches his son to objectify women. Reacting calmly and respectfully will teach his son to be a gentleman even when the woman isn't dressed like a lady. The best exposure kids can get, IMO, is by seeing their parents, grandparents and other happily married couples flirt with each other and show normal affection within the boundaries God has set.

Education, lots of communication, good examples, biblical perspective--YES!!! Graphic sex scenes in movies? Never necessary.

Totally agree, well said!!