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Originally Posted by ILG
Sure is. People also don't listen when you have a lot of pain, which sometimes does come off as whining. When you sound whiny it makes people shut off....which causes a vicious cycle because then the pain gets worse. It is really easier to heal away from those who misunderstand where you are coming from.
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Yes, I do see that. And I am very bad about it, because I can't lay down for long. Even when my husband is ill, I make him get off the bed so I can change the sheets. I hate sickness! I know I do need to work on being patient with those that are seemingly whining. Not everyone reacts the way I do and I need to understand that.
A good friend taught me a lesson when she shared about going to counseling. She said that there is a part of you that wants to go back to the "comfort zone" because it's easier to stay where you are. She said it takes real work to be healed and you have to want to do it. You could be counseled for a long time and never get better/healed, if you are not trying and don't really want to help yourself.
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I do remember tussling with you, but I also remember you coming back and saying you were sorry and that you were going to try to listen.  I also left the board largely for a while which helped me free my mind up and gave me some room to heal.
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Sometimes I have to stop reading here as well. For that matter, I have to stop reading so much of the news, which is something I love to do. I can actually feel myself relax when I sit down and hit my favorite news sources. That is just sick! LOL!
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Those who go on and on....well, give them some time. They'll probably figure it out eventually. Those who are still in the UPC, if you all are happy there, the best thing you can do is give a patient ear. It proves there are caring people in the UPC.
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I started out with some negative posting when I began with FCF. We were going through a really hard time in our lives. After I posted a while, it was mainly at NFCF, I began to realize that where I am is where I want to be. On AFF, I am sure of it. So, it hasn't been all that bad. Although, honestly, I think I am less trusting than I was in the past.
Hybrid Mode
