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| Fellowship Hall The place to go for Fellowship & Fun! |
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01-05-2012, 11:42 AM
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Pride of the Neighborhood
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 6,166
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What Must I Do To Be Saved?
For fun let's list ALL of the requirements (extra-biblical) that we must do to go heaven:
Don't go to movies,
Don't cut your hair
Don't wear make up
Don't wear jewelry
Don't wear pants (women only)
Don't wear shorts
Don't have a beard, mustache, sideburns, goatee, soul patch
Don't own a tv
Don't watch a tv
Don't watch DVDs or videos or 16 mm filmstrips
Don't listen to wurrly music
Don't go to amusement parks
Don't go to baseball games
Don't go to football games
Don't go to hockey games
Don't go to basketball games
Don't play Little League anything
Don't participate in school sports
Don't participate in any school extra curricular activities
Don't wear wedding rangs
Don't wear short sleeves
Don't wear colored chapstick
Just to name a few...
Anyone else want to add to the list?
This ones for Timmy 
__________________
When a newspaper posed the question, "What's Wrong with the World?" G. K. Chesterton reputedly wrote a brief letter in response: "Dear Sirs: I am. Sincerely Yours, G. K. Chesterton." That is the attitude of someone who has grasped the message of Jesus.
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01-05-2012, 11:47 AM
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Isaiah 56:4-5
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: SOUTH ZION
Posts: 11,307
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
This isn't fun.
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01-05-2012, 11:57 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 31,124
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Be saved by repentance, baptism, receiving the Holy Ghost. Be holy by obeying the Ten Commandments.
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01-05-2012, 12:00 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: AZ
Posts: 16,746
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
Quote:
Don't go to movies,
Don't cut your hair
Don't wear make up
Don't wear jewelry
Don't wear pants (women only)
Don't wear shorts
Don't have a beard, mustache, sideburns, goatee, soul patch
Don't own a tv
Don't watch a tv
Don't watch DVDs or videos or 16 mm filmstrips
Don't listen to wurrly music
Don't go to amusement parks
Don't go to baseball games
Don't go to football games
Don't go to hockey games
Don't go to basketball games
Don't play Little League anything
Don't participate in school sports
Don't participate in any school extra curricular activities
Don't wear wedding rangs
Don't wear short sleeves
Don't wear colored chapstick
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Don't miss church. Ever!
DO pay your tithes (based on 10% of your gross paycheck).
DO pay offerings (which was taught to be 5% of your gross). Anything above THAT is true giving.
DO "obey them that have the rule (or ruler?) over you" in ALL things.
Don't go on a date unchaperoned.
Don't kiss your wife until she IS your wife.
Don't even think of asking her to be your wife until you get your pastors permission.
Last edited by RandyWayne; 01-05-2012 at 12:05 PM.
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01-05-2012, 12:03 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 5,600
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
Quote:
Originally Posted by deacon blues
For fun let's list ALL of the requirements (extra-biblical) that we must do to go heaven:
Don't go to movies,
Don't cut your hair
Don't wear make up
Don't wear jewelry
Don't wear pants (women only)
Don't wear shorts
Don't have a beard, mustache, sideburns, goatee, soul patch
Don't own a tv
Don't watch a tv
Don't watch DVDs or videos or 16 mm filmstrips
Don't listen to wurrly music
Don't go to amusement parks
Don't go to baseball games
Don't go to football games
Don't go to hockey games
Don't go to basketball games
Don't play Little League anything
Don't participate in school sports
Don't participate in any school extra curricular activities
Don't wear wedding rangs
Don't wear short sleeves
Don't wear colored chapstick
Just to name a few...
Anyone else want to add to the list?
This ones for Timmy |
Some people took it so far as to not frequent any restaurants that serve beer.
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01-05-2012, 12:13 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 143
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
Quote:
Originally Posted by AreYouReady?
Some people took it so far as to not frequent any restaurants that serve beer.
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Yuck!!! That would limit your choices pretty much to only fast food restaurants  .
__________________
This world is not my home, I'm just a passing through.
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01-05-2012, 12:14 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: AZ
Posts: 16,746
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pilgrum
Yuck!!! That would limit your choices pretty much to only fast food restaurants . |
.....and buffets. Why do you think they are so popular with church folk? OK, the real reason they are popular is because the never ending smorgasbord of blandness they offer but still, I can't recall any that serve alcohol other than perhaps a few oriental ones I've been to.
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01-05-2012, 12:15 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,485
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
All of the above plus.
No open toe shoes.
No clear fingernail polish.
Nothing in the hair that is not the same color as the hair.
Hair up for all married women except at home and if there are no non-family males in the house.
Long sleeves only for men.
Any male on platform or picking up offering must wear a suit.
Women must have ankle length skirts on platform.
No swimming with anyone but family
No waterparks/beaches but the lake is OK... (pastor is a freshwater fisherman) 
No hugging non family members of the opposite sex. Every time we visit extended Bapist family this gets me in trouble- I stick my hand out from habbit... They beleive Christians hug everybody.
Must have pastors permission to accept a job offer out of town, move to anywhere to far to drive to his church, go on vacation, buy a house, new car or other large purchases.
Of course to not seek permission is disobedience, which is the same sin as witchcraft, which is how you will be lost, you witch you.
Last edited by Titus2woman; 01-05-2012 at 12:27 PM.
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01-05-2012, 12:19 PM
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This is still that!
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Sebastian, FL
Posts: 9,886
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
no beach
no pool
no mixed bathing
no visiting other churches of same persuasion (other oneness churches) without letting the Pastor know
no dating unless in a group (probably a good rule for teenagers actually)
no riding in the car with anyone from the opposite sex that you are not a relative of (probably not a bad idea)
can not touch opposite sex at all, unless married, can only shake their hands
must wear pantyhose (females)
must address anyone in a leadership position by last name, IE, Bro Smith, Sister Smith, ect.
women stay in kitchen and talk, wait on men who are in living room
going to the doctor is seen as a lack of faith, though not prohibited,
women encouraged to have babies at home
must win one soul a year or your salvation is in jeopardy
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01-05-2012, 04:07 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,206
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Re: What Must I Do To Be Saved?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amanah
no beach
no pool
no mixed bathing
no visiting other churches of same persuasion (other oneness churches) without letting the Pastor know
no dating unless in a group (probably a good rule for teenagers actually)
no riding in the car with anyone from the opposite sex that you are not a relative of (probably not a bad idea)
can not touch opposite sex at all, unless married, can only shake their hands
must wear pantyhose (females)
must address anyone in a leadership position by last name, IE, Bro Smith, Sister Smith, ect.
women stay in kitchen and talk, wait on men who are in living room
going to the doctor is seen as a lack of faith, though not prohibited,
women encouraged to have babies at home
must win one soul a year or your salvation is in jeopardy
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Amanah, those hose must have a seam down the back. (Do they still make those?) I guess when they quit making seam hose God will change His doctrine on this, at that time!
Been Thinkin
__________________
"From the time you're born, 'til you ride in the hearse, there ain't nothing bad that couldn't be worse!"
LIFE: Some days you're the dog and some days you're the hydrant! 
I have ... Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia! The fear of long words.
"Prediction is very hard, especially about the future." - Yogi Berra
"I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave in reflection." - Thomas Paine
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