Apostolic Friends Forum
Tab Menu 1
Go Back   Apostolic Friends Forum > The Fellowship Hall > Fellowship Hall
Facebook

Notices

Fellowship Hall The place to go for Fellowship & Fun!


View Poll Results: What is your status?
Single - never married 10 7.04%
Married - never divorced 100 70.42%
Divorced - not remarried 16 11.27%
Divorced - remarried 16 11.27%
Voters: 142. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #181  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:42 PM
berkeley berkeley is offline
Saved & Shaved


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SOUTH ZION
Posts: 10,795
Quote:
Originally Posted by nahkoe View Post
Hey, I happen to know some legitimately self employed men! They wanted to date at a time when I simply could not. They were...well, I'd have had a lifestyle I've never had before, that's for sure. (real estate and construction management in a booming housing market)
I am not saying that there are not self employed men... but in her case, self employed was code for "hustler".
Reply With Quote
  #182  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:43 PM
Rhoni Rhoni is offline
delete account


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 8,086
Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by nahkoe View Post
No job, no money, no me. Sorry...

Now, as for being the sugar mama. I have one reason, and one reason alone I would do that. I feel my children would be best off with a parent at home. If I am the one capable of making the greater income (likely once I graduate) and he is willing to be the mostly at home parent, I would support that until the kids were a bit older.

Then again, he could just have a nice work from home business going and we could have the best of all worlds.

No matter what, I will never again put myself at the mercy of someone else financially. I will support myself and my children, EVEN if he wants to take care of us. I guess I'll just accrue a large savings portfolio. I just can't ever be in a position where I am unable to care for and provide for myself and my children again.
Nahkoe,

Those of us who have been in your situation can empathize. I am not looking for a man to take care of me financially but I don't want a man I have to take care of ...been there and done that. I want an equal partner. I don't care who makes the most money all I care about is that he is responsible and has the same interests. Missions is always a possibility...I am ready for adventure.

Blessings,Rhoni
Reply With Quote
  #183  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:45 PM
nahkoe's Avatar
nahkoe nahkoe is offline
Mama to four little angels.


 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,053
Quote:
Originally Posted by Berkeley View Post
Don't put yourself out there like that. Seriously, that's like painting a bullseye!!
So? Since I'm not dating it doesn't matter. lol

I did go through a time period when I said I'd support a lazy good for nothing if he'd just sit here and keep the kids safe and happy all day. I think I'm past that now though. lol
__________________
You become free from who you have become, by becoming who you were meant to be. ~Mark from another forum I post on

God did it for us. Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A pure gift. He got us out of the mess we're in and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. And he did it by means of Jesus Christ. ~Romans 3:24 from The Message
Reply With Quote
  #184  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:46 PM
Rhoni Rhoni is offline
delete account


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 8,086
Not all self-employed men are hustlers but worrying about tax write-offs and discussing business over meals is not a lifestyle I enjoy. I don't like discussing or worrying about money all the time.
Reply With Quote
  #185  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:47 PM
berkeley berkeley is offline
Saved & Shaved


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SOUTH ZION
Posts: 10,795
Quote:
Originally Posted by nahkoe View Post
So? Since I'm not dating it doesn't matter. lol

I did go through a time period when I said I'd support a lazy good for nothing if he'd just sit here and keep the kids safe and happy all day. I think I'm past that now though. lol
Reply With Quote
  #186  
Old 12-24-2007, 02:52 PM
nahkoe's Avatar
nahkoe nahkoe is offline
Mama to four little angels.


 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,053
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhoni View Post
Nahkoe,

Those of us who have been in your situation can empathize. I am not looking for a man to take care of me financially but I don't want a man I have to take care of ...been there and done that. I want an equal partner. I don't care who makes the most money all I care about is that he is responsible and has the same interests. Missions is always a possibility...I am ready for adventure.

Blessings,Rhoni
I think the responsibility is the key. If I met some starving artist who was doing what he passionately loves and has also lived within his means w/o accruing huge debt or begging/borrowing, that's cool with me.

The equal partner is a big deal to me too. If he's willing to get the kids from school, do their homework, fix dinner, do some laundry, mop a floor or two. Well, I happen to know what the value of that is. It doesn't have to be equal to be equitable. And while my kids are little, they're my priority. They'll grow up soon enough.

Not that any of this much matters. I don't see myself dating soon, I just don't.
__________________
You become free from who you have become, by becoming who you were meant to be. ~Mark from another forum I post on

God did it for us. Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A pure gift. He got us out of the mess we're in and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. And he did it by means of Jesus Christ. ~Romans 3:24 from The Message
Reply With Quote
  #187  
Old 12-24-2007, 09:46 PM
Neck's Avatar
Neck Neck is offline
"It's Never Too Late"


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 4,415
Quote:
Originally Posted by chseeads View Post
And it's better to dwell in the wilderness than with a contentious and an angry woman.
He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing.

You need to make a wise choice.

And please make a wise choice for her and you...

You might not be the best package for marriage as well....

The frying pan can be swung by both parties....
Reply With Quote
  #188  
Old 12-24-2007, 09:55 PM
Neck's Avatar
Neck Neck is offline
"It's Never Too Late"


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 4,415
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhoni View Post
Well many don't tell you that or they say they are self-employed...I usually give a guy three dates. By then I just know Most I give 1.
Rhoni,


I just counseled a friend he was 42 when he got married. He worked in my field of sales Telecommunications.

He has earned on average for the past 15 years over 100K.

He was divorced once back 12 years ago.

He was married 6 months she cheated on him with a former boyfriend.

It hurt him so much he stopped trusting and dating.

We met about 8 years ago when working together.

He kept telling my wife you restore the fact to me that there are good women out there.

He met his wife a couple of years ago.

She was 37 and 5 years younger.

She a High school teacher.

Never married and very professional.

So when they started to get serious.

My friend Paul told me.

I don't want to sound weird but I want to share my financial position with her if she will share her's with me.

I told him he should tell her anytime she wants to know all of his finances they should sit down together.

When she told her dad about this request.

He told her right on the spot, he is a keeper.

The story ended up, He had a net worth of $600,000.00 her with $300,000.00.

They are married own 2 homes paid off and she is trying to have a baby.

They do not have a car payment, mortgage payment.

So they can have her take 5 years off and keep up her schooling.

Without having to use their investments.

Never date a deadbeat!

Nathan
Reply With Quote
  #189  
Old 12-24-2007, 10:28 PM
HeavenlyOne HeavenlyOne is offline
Lofty, Scientific, and Literal


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 11,736
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhoni View Post
LOL..it never ceases to amaze me how that when everything is all said and done...my field of study is always criticised and my person attacked and I have no clue about you guys but if you'd like to think the worst of me..help yourself but you waste your energy.

Merry Christmas, Rhoni
So now your field of study is criticized and you are attacked. And just exactly where did that happen?

Funny though. When I 'assume' you were referring to me, you act all innocent as if you have not a clue. But now you can speak about being attacked and such, but I gotta tell you, I have no idea what you are talking about.

Nobody attacked you nor your work. But if you like wearing the badge of martyr, knock yourself out.
__________________
I've gone and done it now! I'm on Facebook!!!
My Countdown Counting down to: My world crashing to the ground.
Is this what being 40 is all about???
Reply With Quote
  #190  
Old 12-24-2007, 10:32 PM
HeavenlyOne HeavenlyOne is offline
Lofty, Scientific, and Literal


 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 11,736
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhoni View Post
Sorry you are having a bad day HO...but I am not having one with you. I am having an awesome day.

Blessings, Rhoni
Who said I'm having a bad day?

I actually had quite a fun day myself. I rarely ever have a bad day!

Keeping oneself busy helps!
__________________
I've gone and done it now! I'm on Facebook!!!
My Countdown Counting down to: My world crashing to the ground.
Is this what being 40 is all about???
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Have any AFF'ers started a church from zero? Darcie Soul Winners Haven 134 04-23-2017 10:53 PM
Any AFF'ers on MySpace? Darcie Fellowship Hall 187 03-28-2008 07:09 PM
Current Membership Status H2H Fellowship Hall 22 10-12-2007 01:46 PM
How Many AFF'ers Live Near My Road Trip? Digging4Truth Fellowship Hall 24 05-19-2007 04:27 PM

 
User Infomation
Your Avatar

Latest Threads
- by Salome
- by Salome

Help Support AFF!

Advertisement




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:30 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2026, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.