How does your church safeguard your children?

[missourimary]

I agree with background checks. Do them to prevent liability on the church. Keep it quiet though. Don't rely on them.

Also, do have some sort of a check system in place for people picking up their kids, and even for those sending their kids on the bus. How simple is it for you to drop off a bus kid whose uncle or brother or aunt is home... only to find out later that the relative wasn't supposed to be alone with the child and hurt them? As a child, I wasn't supposed to be alone with three different relatives. No one outside the family was aware of the particulars since nothing had gone to court. A release form for who bus kids can be left with and a simple sticker system for parents with kids can be extremely helpful. (Matching stickers for parent and child printed with child's name, some randomly selected word or number that matches only on their stickers, parent or responsible party's names, and any medical needs or allergies-especially for younger ones-can be both protective and life saving in an emergency.)
I would also consider talking to parents about not sending children under a certain age to the bathroom by themselves-always have a parent with a child under a certain age. Just because it's a church doesn't mean some loony couldn't walk in and either snatch a child from a bathroom or mess with them in the bathroom (if you have multiple stall restrooms, at least).
And if possible, I'd recommend restroom monitors if you have larger restrooms.

The two adult rule is wonderful. I wish my former church had done that.

If the church membership is aware of this situation, I'd also recommend having a social worker or marriage and family therapist come to discuss the signs of abuse, how to talk to children about abuse, how to prevent abuse, and what to do if they suspect abuse. One of the local colleges might be able to send a second year grad student out for free if you can't afford to hire someone for a class or series of classes.

[James Griffin]

Originally Posted by Sherri

- We do background checks on all workers in youth or children's departments, paid or nonpaid.
- We have a hired security guard at the kid's entrance every week.
- We have a locked-down nursery area that is only accessible with a number code and no adults are allowed past a certain door, where they hand over their children. They are given a pager and that is the only way they can get their child back.
- We have a scanner that registers our kids with a bar code system.

We have learned that in this day and age, you cannot afford to be lax in security.

http://www.reducingtherisk.com/

The above link is fairly comprehensive. I teach a seminar at local churches on the topic. Sherri's list is the most comprehensive. Not practical for extremely small church. But it the part she listed does seem focused on outside threats. The kids are more likely be to molested by a worker than a stranger at church.Therefore the TWO adult rule should be paramount

For small churches, two adult rule is number one deterrent to prevent and stopping false accusation. If someone does not show at the minimum have someone patrolling making unannounced stops at the classes. As Ferd said no areas inside the room that cannot be seen from the outside. Full background checks on all helpers. Both for prevention and mitigation of liability. That is the absolute minimum.

All workers should go through an annual training such as the one offered at the website above. (I have no connection with that company)

Larger churches. In this age of custody battles just because a child sees "daddy" or "mommy" is not grounds to let them go. As Sherri church does, only the person dropping off can pick up period. REGISTER the kids. Restrict movement in kids area during services.

Also realize, no matter what precautions are taken, it will still happen.

One of the cases I was involved in was THE pastor, 5 girls over a period of 15 years. After it came to light there were some warning signs missed but nothing overt.

Have a response plan ready. Designated spokesperson etc.

Also know that in some states, like Texas, if you don't report it directly to the police or CPS (telling the pastor is NOT enough) you could be facing criminal charges yourself.

The steps for prevention and limiting liability are pretty much the same.

[Sherri]

Originally Posted by Margies3

WOW, Sherri, you all have the ultimate system set up I'm impressed!! Very good. I imagine in a church the size of yours, you would have to be ultra-careful because of the sheer number of people who are in the building at any given time. I wish we had the money to do things this way.

Let me ask you - do you do background checks on your people who work with children? If so, who do you use?
EDIT: Ooops, I see that you do. So, who do you use??

Accufax, out of Oklahoma. They're fast and efficient. It's about $25 per applicant.

[Sherri]

Oh and definitely no adult left alone without kids - I forgot about that!

[Aquila]

I agree. This sounds like a good system, and I stand behind background checks.

In the post above it was mentioned that parents should be warned about the signs of abuse, how to prevent abuse, and what to do when they suspect abuse.

Encourage parents and children to TALK about sex and things of this nature. All too often we shy away from this sort of thing in church culture. We need to be more open with our kids.

[Margies3]

Originally Posted by missourimary

I agree with background checks. Do them to prevent liability on the church. Keep it quiet though. Don't rely on them.

Also, do have some sort of a check system in place for people picking up their kids, and even for those sending their kids on the bus. How simple is it for you to drop off a bus kid whose uncle or brother or aunt is home... only to find out later that the relative wasn't supposed to be alone with the child and hurt them? As a child, I wasn't supposed to be alone with three different relatives. No one outside the family was aware of the particulars since nothing had gone to court. A release form for who bus kids can be left with and a simple sticker system for parents with kids can be extremely helpful. (Matching stickers for parent and child printed with child's name, some randomly selected word or number that matches only on their stickers, parent or responsible party's names, and any medical needs or allergies-especially for younger ones-can be both protective and life saving in an emergency.)
I would also consider talking to parents about not sending children under a certain age to the bathroom by themselves-always have a parent with a child under a certain age. Just because it's a church doesn't mean some loony couldn't walk in and either snatch a child from a bathroom or mess with them in the bathroom (if you have multiple stall restrooms, at least).
And if possible, I'd recommend restroom monitors if you have larger restrooms.

The two adult rule is wonderful. I wish my former church had done that.

If the church membership is aware of this situation, I'd also recommend having a social worker or marriage and family therapist come to discuss the signs of abuse, how to talk to children about abuse, how to prevent abuse, and what to do if they suspect abuse. One of the local colleges might be able to send a second year grad student out for free if you can't afford to hire someone for a class or series of classes.

I really, really appreciate all of your responses. Thanks so much for taking the time to share your different methods of safeguarding the children in your churches.

MissouriMary, your idea of educating people is a great one. In fact, we have a training scheduled for tomorrow morning Great minds think alike, eh?

[missourimary]

Originally Posted by Margies3

MissouriMary, your idea of educating people is a great one. In fact, we have a training scheduled for tomorrow morning Great minds think alike, eh?