The effects of hurting someone's family

[Sherri]

Originally Posted by deacon blues

Just read this today:

Romans 14 (NIV)
14 Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. 2 One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. 3 The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. 4 Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

5 One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. 6 Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. 7 For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. 8 If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. 9 For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.

10 You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister[a]? Or why do you treat them with contempt? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat. 11 It is written:

“‘As surely as I live,’ says the Lord,
‘every knee will bow before me;
every tongue will acknowledge God.’”[b]
12 So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.

13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. 14 I am convinced, being fully persuaded in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for that person it is unclean. 15 If your brother or sister is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy someone for whom Christ died. 16 Therefore do not let what you know is good be spoken of as evil. 17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, 18 because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and receives human approval.

19 Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. 20 Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a person to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. 21 It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall.

22 So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves. 23 But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.[c]

Don't be messing things up with Scripture!!!
By the way, how've you been????

[Godsdrummer]

I like stories, because if you are telling a story how can someone take offense? Well they might, but it is usually hard.

Any way we had just moved back to the west side of our state, 30 miles from our home town. We were staring a independent church, as there were many things by this time that I had come to disagree with, within UPCI. We quickly established a schedule of holding a service at home, and driving into church for weeknight services at our home church. (the one I was raised in and my wife was saved in)

I used to keep a journal, in which I took notes during services and wrote thoughts concerning other things like my views on standards etc. One service I forgot my journal at the church. A dear sister that came to clean that week found it and began to read it. She came across my notes about standards and took it to the pastor. The very next service, the pastor made derogative comments in reference to my journal. I was working but my family were in attendance. The reference was such that my children never wanted to go back, and with the exception of one daughter, none have darkened a UPCI church again.

I personally made peace with said pastor days after this, and the last time I saw him alive, he made a beeline for me when he came into the same room and we had a great time catching up.

The point to all this is that regardless of our good intents, we should always be careful of what and how we say things, even if we think we are right. One wrong word that causes hurt, can set back years of a good witness.

[Godsdrummer]

Originally Posted by deacon blues

Just read this today:

Romans 14 (NIV)
14 Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. 2 One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. 3 The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. 4 Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

5 One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. 6 Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. 7 For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. 8 If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. 9 For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.

10 You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister[a]? Or why do you treat them with contempt? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat. 11 It is written:

“‘As surely as I live,’ says the Lord,
‘every knee will bow before me;
every tongue will acknowledge God.’”[b]
12 So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.

13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. 14 I am convinced, being fully persuaded in the Lord Jesus, that nothing is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for that person it is unclean. 15 If your brother or sister is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy someone for whom Christ died. 16 Therefore do not let what you know is good be spoken of as evil. 17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, 18 because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and receives human approval.

19 Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. 20 Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a person to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. 21 It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall.

22 So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves. 23 But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.[c]

In recent years this have become a hallmark passage, in dealing with others.
Especially the Bold part, there are many things that I have come to see as not spelled out in scripture, that I have come to allow in my life. But I don't parade that in front of others that feel they are sin.

[KeptByTheWord]

Originally Posted by Godsdrummer

The point to all this is that regardless of our good intents, we should always be careful of what and how we say things, even if we think we are right. One wrong word that causes hurt, can set back years of a good witness.

I daresay that all of us have been hurt by someone who said something about us, to us or to others about us, and when finding out, it hurt, really hurt. Sometimes we may never know what we have said that may have hurt someone.

I've been hurt, many times... but I've let it go.

I've forgiven those who have said things meant to hurt me and meant to hurt my family. I love them, and pray for them. That is the high road Christ has called us to, as His disciples.

Yes, words are far more powerful than we realize.

In the midst of all that has happened on this forum recently, I am being reminded by the Lord that we are accountable for the words we speak. I was just reading in Matthew 12:35-37 this morning, and the passage found there hit my heart heavily.

[Sister Alvear]

God might not only ask us how many Sousa We help suave He might ask how many We Run off....

[Esaias]

Originally Posted by Godsdrummer

In recent years this have become a hallmark passage, in dealing with others.
Especially the Bold part, there are many things that I have come to see as not spelled out in scripture, that I have come to allow in my life. But I don't parade that in front of others that feel they are sin.

You smokin' ceegars down at the casino with a glass of brandy in one hand and a pair of dice in the other?

[Evang.Benincasa]

Psalm 119:165

Great peace have they which love thy law: and NOTHING shall offend them.

[2theX]

Math 18
Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!

[Esaias]

Biblically speaking, 'offend' does not mean 'upset' nor does it mean 'to cause someone to be upset by saying mean things about them.'

It actually means 'to sin against God and one's neighbour'. So, to 'offend someone' Biblically would mean to cause them to sin.

I think the more accurate term for the subject of this thread would be 'reproach'. To reproach someone is to say negative things about them, call them names, talk mean about them.

Which Jesus was wont to do on occasion...

[2theX]

Originally Posted by KeptByTheWord

I daresay that all of us have been hurt by someone who said something about us, to us or to others about us, and when finding out, it hurt, really hurt. Sometimes we may never know what we have said that may have hurt someone.

I've been hurt, many times... but I've let it go.

I've forgiven those who have said things meant to hurt me and meant to hurt my family. I love them, and pray for them. That is the high road Christ has called us to, as His disciples.

Yes, words are far more powerful than we realize.

In the midst of all that has happened on this forum recently, I am being reminded by the Lord that we are accountable for the words we speak. I was just reading in Matthew 12:35-37 this morning, and the passage found there hit my heart heavily.

My prayers are truly with this family.

And those in the family will stay true to the Apostolic message of Holiness.