Sleeping with Uncle Jeff

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by dizzyde

I agree, I think counseling has gotten a black eye in the church. It is hard for me to understand, we (well most of us) believe in going to the doctor when our physical body gets wounded, why do have such a problem with being helped if our mind gets wounded? You absolutely have to use wisdom and do your research, as far as who you allow to counsel you, but there absolutely is a place for it.

Luckily, my pastor agrees with this, there are some topics that he will not counsel a person over, other than to pray with them and to be there for them, he says he is not qualified or trained to counsel people over certain things. He has researched qualified people that he feels comfortable sending his saints to. And I respect him for that.

I personally have seen three different counselors in my life, for a couple of reasons. And they were very helpful. It had nothing to do with my spirituality, or lack there-of, I just needed a little help dealing with some stuff. And I got it and moved on.

I am a counselor and I have went through times that counseling was the only thing that could help. I have met some good ministry that recognize the need for Christian counselors within their churches and also recognize their limitations in this area.

As a Bible Cllege graduate, I have to say there were many areas that ministry were lacking that need to be taught in our colleges. One of these is counseling, others are church administration and working with a church board. But this is another 'issue'.

Good comments btw.

Blessings, rhoni

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Sam

It's a shame that pedophile did not go to prison.
Some times in prisons, pedophiles get "justice" from other prisoners.

Sam,

I have conflicting thoughts on this: Vengeance is mine saith the Lord, I will repay. So I am not sure we should be wishing harm to pedophiles.

The other side of the story is they are to be pitied first, then healing and reparenting, and training need to occur. I would hate to think that there is absolutely no hope for the perpetrator...usually they were once the victim.

Just some additional thoughts, Rhoni

[stmatthew]

Originally Posted by Tina

I'm not sure I want to know any more.

Originally Posted by Daniel Alicea

Bingo

I have already heard enough to know that there will not be any "good outcome" of this. Irreversible damage has been done. There may be healing, but the damage will never be reversed.

[chosenbyone]

Originally Posted by pelathais

Calling several of your own grand-daughters "liars" and "whores..."





I'm sure others will all point to Resolution 4 as being the cause of this.

Appalling! This was a very difficult thread to read through right after the heels of the other molestation scandal in Ohio posted on this forum a couple months ago. Ferd and Steadfast have alluded to there being more to the story than what was written in the article posted; however, if it was true that this man called his own granddaughters "whores", that in itself could have long lasting affects on their mental health.

If this family member, Uncle Jeff, wasn't guilty of these allegations, then why did he accept a plea bargain and force this matter to trail? Perhaps, he already knew that he had won the hearts and minds of those related to these young girls and those members who stayed at New Life.

These girls will live with this for the rest of their lives. The process of healing from sexual abuse can be very long and painful and many have never obtained healing, but were driven to suicide. I was reminded of a dear friend I knew who was such a precious, sensitive and loving woman. She used to cut herself just like the young lady did in the story. She told me she did that because she felt so dead inside and she just wanted to be able to feel something. She ended up taken her life six years ago. She was a victim of child molestation!

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by stmatthew

I have already heard enough to know that there will not be any "good outcome" of this. Irreversible damage has been done. There may be healing, but the damage will never be reversed.

St. Matt,

I may be wrong but I think the world is looking to the church to example healing, forgiveness, and restoration. The last thing the world needs to see is us covering our sins, beating each other up, and ostrasizing the hurting. They need to see us admitting we have the same issues but we want to help heal and restore the hurting...last time I checked we are all called to be ministers of reconcilliation.

Blessings, rhoni

[SoCaliUPC]

KLUM pleaded GUILTY.

End of story. Don't know what else to temper feelings. He violated some children....and practically plea bargained himself out.....

[SoCaliUPC]

Originally Posted by stmatthew

I have already heard enough to know that there will not be any "good outcome" of this. Irreversible damage has been done. There may be healing, but the damage will never be reversed.

Matt...you got that right.

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by chosenbyone

Appalling! This was a very difficult thread to read through right after the heels of the other molestation scandal in Ohio posted on this forum a couple months ago. Ferd and Steadfast have alluded to there being more to the story than what was written in the article posted; however, if it was true that this man called his own granddaughters "whores", that in itself could have long lasting affects on their mental health.

If this family member, Uncle Jeff, wasn't guilty of these allegations, then why did he accept a plea bargain and force this matter to trail? Perhaps, he already knew that he had won the hearts and minds of those related to these young girls and those members who stayed at New Life.

These girls will live with this for the rest of their lives. The process of healing from sexual abuse can be very long and painful and many have never obtained healing, but were driven to suicide. I was reminded of a dear friend I knew who was such a precious, sensitive and loving woman. She used to cut herself just like the young lady did in the story. She told me she did that because she felt so dead inside and she just wanted to be able to feel something. She ended up taken her life six years ago. She was a victim of child molestation!

Trying to find healing for those who were molested that have turned to 'cutting' is very difficult. I am sorry about your friend. It reminds me of that song on one of the CD's you gave me...about the woman searching for someone to care. We should be the people who cae.

Blessings, Rhoni

[SoCaliUPC]

If anyone knew the state people get to to self-mutilation (cutting)....there is some serious internal garbage that they are dealing with. The sad thing...they felt they could go to nobody.

I am sick on so many levels with this case.

[chosenbyone]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Trying to find healing for those who were molested that have turned to 'cutting' is very difficult. I am sorry about your friend. It reminds me of that song on one of the CD's you gave me...about the woman searching for someone to care. We should be the people who cae.

Blessings, Rhoni

Rhoni,

For so long, I lived with so much guilt that I could have done something to have prevented her from taking her life. I knew her for only three years and it was so difficult when she would slip into this state of depression like none I had ever witnessed before in my life.

She would just disappear and then show up at my door and she would show me the cuts along her arm and just cry. It was her deepest secret that she only shared with me. I didn't understand the illness that she had and all I could do was pray for her. I felt so inapt to stop what I feared would eventually happen.

I will never forget her as long as I live.