There was a guy making an announcement, He said, "This Saturday the youth will be having a sexual youth rally" the Pastor yells, SECTIONAL, SECTIONAL youth rally.....
My parents were missionaries first to the country of Norway and then after 2 1/2 years we moved to the country of Sweden. Norwegian and Swedish are similar but they have a few different words. Well my dad was preaching one of his first messages in Swedish and throughout the whole sermon there were people snickering in the audience. At the end of the sermon my father found out that instead of preaching about the Lord he was preaching about the rabbit! "Let's praise the Rabbit everyone!"
Living in Sweden, people thought we were really weird. Well on the way to go visit a family we saw some ducks in a pond so we decided to stop and feed the ducks. Well, when we got to the families house my mom was explaining to them what we did before we got there. After telling them, they got some weird expressions on their faces. My mom, picking up on that she said something wrong, asked what she had said. My mom wanted to say "We stopped by a pond to feed the ducks". What she said was, "We stopped by a pond to feed the spirits".
My mom and sisters were out shopping and they were about to leave. So my mom called out for my sister to come because it was time to go. Well my sister said, "Just a sec". My mom blurted out without thinking, "We don't have time for secs". My mom, who doesn't get easily embarrassed, was very red in the face from what I understand.
I remember a missionary (can't remember who nor where they were from) telling a story about how he got words mixed up and was preaching about people receiving the Holy Ghost in their beer......LOL!
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I've gone and done it now! I'm on Facebook!!!
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People who are always looking for fault,can find it easily all they have to do,is look into their mirror.
There they can find plenty of fault.
I believe it was a sectional rally in Tennessee where the leader, who apparently had gas, came to the pulpit after a song and said, "Let's all just raise our hands and fart!"
Point of order, Mr. Chairman. I have to take exception with the inaccuracies and fallibility of this post. Gomer Pyle, played by Jim Nabors was NEVER on the TV Show "Mayberry RFD". He appeared only on THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW, and latter went on to his own series "Gomer Pyle USMC". His character on the AGS was replaced by Gomers cousin , Goober, played by George Lindsay. As a side note, Goobers last name was not Pyle, as many "novice" fans of the show mistakenly believe. He was, in at least one episode, named "Goober Beasley". (Script continuity was never a high priority on the show.) Mayberry RFD, IMO, was a poor attempt to continue the legacy of the original show.
Andy Griffith, who played Andy Taylor, Sheriff and Justice of the Peace of the town of Mayberry, intended to become a minister, but chose acting as a career instead. Mayberry is a fictitous town loosely based on Mt. Airy, NC, the hometown of Andy Griffith.
And those are the facts with my right hand up. So, in reference to Bro. Sams mistake, and in the immortal words of our own Deputy Barney Fife: "Nip it! Nip in the bud!"
FINALLY! Someone who can rival my cousin Angie in Mayberry Trivia! She brought the game to my house once and "ran the board" on us THREE TIMES! LOL The one GOOD thing is that she stopped watching when it colorized and since she NEVER like Helen Crump (thought she was stuck up) I got those answers!
I had just started preaching in my younger days. I was preaching on the rich man and Lazarus. And then I said, "And the rich man cried out in hell, please let Lazarus "dip his tongue in water" and cool my tongue!
And then recently I said "and he lay prostate before the Lord." (Okay, I had just had a prostate examination. What more do you expect?)
One preacher was teaching in a Bible College about the disciples and their attitudes. He spoke about Peter and how "hardheaded" he was. And then he blundered when he said, "And that's what the church needs today is a bunch of "hardheaded Peters!"
One Evangelist was arriving at the church where he was preaching. A "veeeeery" large lady opened the door and welcomed the evangelist and his wife to the church. The Evangelist and his wife were okay until the lady introduced herself as "Sister Sidebottom." At that point it was the challenge of the day to keep from breaking out into uncontrollable laughter.
The visiting preacher was sitting on the platform with the pastor. He learned over and asked the pastor, "Who is that large fat woman sitting on the front pew?" The pastor replied, "That's my wife!" Knowing he had goofed, the visiting preacher tried to save himself. He quickly added..."No, no, I'm talking about the one sitting next to her." ... "That's my daughter," the pastor responded. The meeting closed that night.
Been Thinkin
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"From the time you're born, 'til you ride in the hearse, there ain't nothing bad that couldn't be worse!"
LIFE: Some days you're the dog and some days you're the hydrant!
I have ... Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia! The fear of long words.
"Prediction is very hard, especially about the future." - Yogi Berra
"I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave in reflection." - Thomas Paine
Location: just north of the celtics red sox and patriots go baby!
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Re: Pulpit Bloopers.
Pastor was warning parents on just letting their children run wild outside after church with the proliferation of sex offenders now . And he said" most of us wouldnt know one if they walked right through that door ", fortunately the 2 that had been attending services recently, wern't there that night.
one time my pastor was preaching and said 365 days a week,we laugh and when he was done i closed the service out and i said the same thing he did..my wife told me this one....her cousin said stand on your hands and raise your feet and start praising the lord..
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