OK read the first page and saw that there are many or at least a few who think that it may be wrong for a son or son in law to follow a father or FIL.
Let me try to weigh in on the other side of the coin. In many cases of a church that has grown that son or SIL has been there through the process and understands what makes the church run and why elements are put in place and why certain things are done. They literally become part of the fabric of that church. Many times, not every time, when someone is brought in that has not been there it brings distruction. There are times that distruction comes from turning it over to a family member too.
My point is simply this, If God is in the process, then there is nothing wrong with a son or SIL talking over at the right time, and naturally if God is not in it, then it will fail.
I really dont think that there is a rock solid - this is the way it should be done every time - answer for this question. Each one comes around and has to be delt with on an individual basis.
Personally if God allows it to happen, I would be honored beyond measure if one of my sons were called to preach and pastor and then fill my shoes, or the same can be said of the one SIL that God has blessed us with that is a minister or if one of my other two daughters marry a minister who can fill the job, but again IT HAS TO BE A GOD THING.
And yes there have been times that some didnt listen to Him........but there have been many where people did.........
I think that a person needs to be qualified to be a pastor. A son or SIL that has been in the church a while could just as easily destroy a church because he has "history" there. I think it's more feasible for a new outside qualified person to come and take over that work and be less biased about how he approaches the work there. IF the church was built on God's foundation and NOT the personality of the outgoing pastor, the switch should be pretty smooth if he runs things without making drastic changes. History pretty much shows that whenever there is a pastoral switch, some of the church members do some switching also. That said, I do think it's ok for a Son or SIL to pastor but I think it's best that they do not take the church of their parents unless God really blesses it. JMHO.
My experience: I married the daughter of a pastor of an Apostolic church. I became the Associate pastor, serving for close to 20 years. My In-laws were elderly and I began doing the role of pastor. I married, buried, counseled, preached with the consent of my In-laws. But...my sister-in-law had a son that she wanted to have the church. She kept telling her mama and daddy that her son was in direct line to have the church. Mind you, I married the pastor's daughter, her sister! But that wasn't good enough. Soon, my wife and I were forced to leave, it became that bad. So...to answer the question, YES, in my observation, churches are seriously guilty of nepotism, to the nth degree!
Did the son take over the church and is he still pastoring there? Is the work successful? God works all things for the good and I am curious that although this was a difficult experience for you (as it would be with anybody) if the family relationships were restored. Did your lifepath take a good course after that experience?
The Bible tells us a "prophet has honor save in his own country". It is difficult for the Pastor's son to take over his church because the people saw him grow up and make mistakes and they don't have the respect they should have for the ministry. I think if they get out on their own and establish themselves, then often times they can come back...but it has to be about God and not just keeping the church and the church money in the family.
Lots of times the pastor brings in his family in order to preserve his legacy and his work.
I can see it from his point, but I am not sure he may be able to see it from the congregation's point.
I know of one situation where the Son in law was put up as the "Associate" ("HE IS NOT THE ASSISTANT, HE IS THE ASSOCIATE!!!!!!!!!!!!) pastor.
The folks were made to respect this individual in the same manner as the pastor was respected just because he said vows with the daughter. What the pastor failed to realize was that over time he had earned the people's trust and unfortunately when he did this that trust was damaged in many ways.
Needless to say the son in law was not, is not, nor will ever be pastoring material, even though he is an adequate evangelist. The church would fall apart in months and years of work would be flushed should he take the reins. I have no idea what is going on but I do know the pastor now preaches less than 1x per month and the church has been having evangelist after evangelist preach. I wonder if it is a pastoral American Idol taking place before our eyes...
I believe this is going on in several other areas of the country as well...
Yeah right...LOL. Unless the saints want her to be. Everyone has their idea of what the Pastor's wife should be or do. The Pastor's wife is always to blame. If the Pastor makes a success it is despite his wife, if he is a failure it is because of his wife.
This is outside the realm of my experience and I'm thankful for that.
__________________ Smiles & Blessings.... ~Felicity Welsh~ (surname courtesy of Jim Yohe)
This is outside the realm of my experience and I'm thankful for that.
LOL - You are my alien friend.
Blessings, Rhoni
P.S. I am thankful that you have not been through all I have been through. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. But the strength I have received through the struggle makes it worth it.
P.S. I am thankful that you have not been through all I have been through. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. But the strength I have received through the struggle makes it worth it.
I've been through a lot! And that just barely begins to describe what all I have been through. It's just that I personally can't relate at all with this......
Quote:
If the Pastor makes a success it is despite his wife, if he is a failure it is because of his wife.
Signed.........
Your alien friend. LOL.
__________________ Smiles & Blessings.... ~Felicity Welsh~ (surname courtesy of Jim Yohe)
OK read the first page and saw that there are many or at least a few who think that it may be wrong for a son or son in law to follow a father or FIL.
Let me try to weigh in on the other side of the coin. In many cases of a church that has grown that son or SIL has been there through the process and understands what makes the church run and why elements are put in place and why certain things are done. They literally become part of the fabric of that church. Many times, not every time, when someone is brought in that has not been there it brings distruction. There are times that distruction comes from turning it over to a family member too.
My point is simply this, If God is in the process, then there is nothing wrong with a son or SIL talking over at the right time, and naturally if God is not in it, then it will fail.
I really dont think that there is a rock solid - this is the way it should be done every time - answer for this question. Each one comes around and has to be delt with on an individual basis.
Personally if God allows it to happen, I would be honored beyond measure if one of my sons were called to preach and pastor and then fill my shoes, or the same can be said of the one SIL that God has blessed us with that is a minister or if one of my other two daughters marry a minister who can fill the job, but again IT HAS TO BE A GOD THING.
And yes there have been times that some didnt listen to Him........but there have been many where people did.........
This is true... your entire post is true.
__________________ Mrs. LPW
Psalm 19:14
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.
Everyone has their idea of what the Pastor's wife should be or do. The Pastor's wife is always to blame. If the Pastor makes a success it is despite his wife, if he is a failure it is because of his wife.
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