Attn Admin Immediate

[AreYouReady?]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

Cute or hot? I think those things occur fairly naturally, so....

Now, as to whether a Christian man would want a woman who trolls for boyfriends online, that is another question.

Considering all of the men I have observed in my 56 years, it's a very rare man who would pick a plain jane over a "cute and hot" chick.

Now unless that man is looking for integrity and character over cute and hot looks, he is going to pick the visibly attractive looking woman of his liking.

The various ministers/and/or/pentecostal men I've observed who cheated on their wives were with women who did not ascribe to the standards. Why is that?

[AreYouReady?]

I was chosen by my husband for my integrity and character.

But after all these years he still finds me attractive.

[MissBrattified]

Originally Posted by AreYouReady?

Considering all of the men I have observed in my 56 years, it's a very rare man who would pick a plain jane over a "cute and hot" chick.

Now unless that man is looking for integrity and character over cute and hot looks, he is going to pick the visibly attractive looking woman of his liking.

Yes, well, it's quite possible for a woman to be beautiful both inside and out, and there is nothing wrong with a man wanting both. It's presumptuous to assume that a pretty woman is vapid, and equally presumptuous to assume her husband chose her only for her outward appearance.

Being a "plain jane" says nothing at all about a woman's character. A lack of physical beauty doesn't equal an overabundance of moral fortitude, character or intelligence.

The various ministers/and/or/pentecostal men I've observed who cheated on their wives were with women who did not ascribe to the standards. Why is that?

I have no idea, and I don't know how it's relevant to this thread.

[AreYouReady?]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

Yes, well, it's quite possible for a woman to be beautiful both inside and out, and there is nothing wrong with a man wanting both. It's presumptuous to assume that a pretty woman is vapid, and equally presumptuous to assume her husband chose her only for her outward appearance.

Being a "plain jane" says nothing at all about a woman's character. A lack of physical beauty doesn't equal an overabundance of moral fortitude, character or intelligence.



I have no idea, and I don't know how it's relevant to this thread.

I can agree with the presumptions you made. But you don't agree with my observations? Doesn't matter. They were my observations of what men have done in the past.

How it is relevant to this thread? Read all the men's comments.

[houston]

Originally Posted by Monterrey

Dem gorda women are nice....

Keeps you warm in winter and gives shade in summer!

Houston needs one of dems bigs one!

¡Pos que! ¿que es esto?

[houston]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

Yes, well, it's quite possible for a woman to be beautiful both inside and out, and there is nothing wrong with a man wanting both. It's presumptuous to assume that a pretty woman is vapid, and equally presumptuous to assume her husband chose her only for her outward appearance.

Being a "plain jane" says nothing at all about a woman's character. A lack of physical beauty doesn't equal an overabundance of moral fortitude, character or intelligence.

Amen, sister!!!

[MissBrattified]

Originally Posted by AreYouReady?

I can agree with the presumptions you made. But you don't agree with my observations? Doesn't matter. They were my observations of what men have done in the past.

How it is relevant to this thread? Read all the men's comments.

I think you are assuming a lot more about men than I would. I don't find men to be anymore shallow than women when it comes to physical appearance. Of course we are attracted with our eyes, first. That's normal. Human. In the big picture of a relationship, physical chemistry definitely matters.

However, most people won't stick around a good-looking man or beautiful woman very long if their personality isn't also attractive. So, no. I haven't noticed men marrying awful women because they are pretty, or the reverse. Not as a matter of the majority, anyway. I've known quite a few men and women who married average-looking people because they had beautiful spirits and great personalities, so IMO most people put more emphasis on the real person and not their outer appearance. Just maybe not initially....

[AreYouReady?]

Maybe so Ms B.

But I am not assuming anything about men being shallow. I know that there are men who find plain women to be beautiful because of their personality. I told you...my husband married me not because I am beautiful. Quite the contrary, if you would see me you would understand. He saw something in me that made me attractive to him. And he still loves me after 28 years of marriage.

You are talking about men who marry. However, I am talking about men who cheat on their wives and the type of women they cheat with are "cute and hot".
Maybe I failed to make that clear in my other posts.

What I am saying here is that I observed when men cheat on their wives, it is usually someone who is attractive in their appearance, women who cut and style their hair. They wear jewelry, makeup and pants or skimpy tops that show their cleavage. They are self confident and many are professional women. All of the pentecostal men I have observed who cheated on their wives, discarded their wives for worldly women who look like this. They want a holy looking woman to marry, but when they cheat it is the 'cute and hot' women they cheat with.

That is after 30 years of observation in my area and I know what I am talking about and that is not saying that all men are shallow beings.

[KeptByTheWord]

What you are speaking of, AYR, is a problem that has plagued men since Adam, I believe. David with all his wives, still committed adultery with Bathsheba. I'm sure he had beautiful wives that he could have stayed with. So why did his heart desire Bathsheba? Why did Solomon with all his wives, still keep acquiring more? Why wasn't he satisfied with one?

I think it is the allure/lust of having something that is not yours to have. I think all men struggle with it, for some reason.

My husband has worked with men who have shared that they have a wife at home, whom they love dearly, speak highly of, and would fight to the death for her... yet, keep a girlfriend on the side "for fun". They speak highly of their wife, love her and their children dearly, and yet live a double life? Why is this?

I don't know that I have the answers.... it must be a deep dark secret in the hearts of men... but you are right, AYR, it is an issue that no doubt every man must deal with, because it happens so often, and to so many good men too.

As a woman, I can't understand or comprehend such a thing ... but being married to a man, and understanding, and seeing the nature of a man's sex drive and the physical nature of it... as opposed to my female nature with it being more emotional... I can see where a man can easily separate the two, and love his wife with all his heart emotionally, yet desire another woman physically. ?? It apparently is something that all red-blooded men have to live with, and fight.

That physical desire that males have, I believe, must come under the spirit of Christ, and die a daily death... in order to live a moral, holy life. Without the help of Christ in this area of their life.... all men are subject to the sins of immorality, if they give in to its daily, or even moment by moment temptations.

And it behooves all of us married women to understand this in a man, and be willing to accomodate our husband's physical needs even when emotionally, we may not be in the same place.

I liken a man's physical sexual need to basically the same need for food, water, and air. When a woman begins to understand these things, she will have the tools she needs to help protect her marriage, and hopefully prevent another woman from providing for the physical sexual needs of her husband.

[navygoat1998]

Too much work to have a wife and a girlfriend! Plus I got it bad for my wife............ she is my Charismatic cutie