You know the stereotypes, right?
The myth that all preachers' kids are,
- rebellious trouble-makers who reek havoc throughout the earth.
- circling the globe attempting to destroy anything good that their parents may do.
- pampered and unappreciative of the people of God.
- blinded by familiarity with the holy things of God.
Well, don't believe everything you hear. The truth is preachers' kids are a lot like any other kids. Their success or failure in life normally hinges on three simple things.
The first hinge is the hinge of parental involvement. Parents who involve themselves in the lives of their children are usually rewarded with good behavior. The earlier that parental involvement begins in a child's educational process, the more powerful the effects. Of course, the opposite is true as well. With that in mind, it's a bad idea for a pastor to place church work above quality time with family.
The second hinge is the hinge of a right relationship with God. Give your kids something positive to emulate. Children need to be taught that Christianity is more than a rite or a ritual, and that they are not saved simply because they hang around the church. Their view of God needs to be personal instead of expectational and traditional. Your kids need to see you pray. They need to know you fast. They need to be around you as you lead others to Christ.
The third hinge is the hinge of realistic expectations. We can't just tell our kids they are to be "an example" because we don't want their bad behavior to damage our pristine reputation. The truth is, kids are kids and we should let them enjoy childhood. They should be disciplined for behavior, not for show. The goal is for them to conform to God's desires - not the desire of your parishoners. In fact, preachers' kids shouldn't live in fear of the opinions and judgements of the saints of God. Freeing your child to "be real" will eliminate any negative feelings he may have toward God's people. This will allow him to grow up with a healthy view of the church.