Going back to the UPC - Page 3

rgcraig · #1 03-24-2008, 01:36 PM

As long as you can agree on "how" to raise her, I think that is the most important factor.

ManOfWord · #2 03-24-2008, 02:04 PM

I think it is most important for a family to be together and that the husband and the wife make the decision together as to where they go to church.

My boys are oneness....to the core and growing up in a "charismatic" (the term some of you use) did not hurt them in the least. They know the way is a relationship, not a formula. I don't regret a single thing in following the pathway the Lord has laid for me.

rgcraig · #3 03-24-2008, 02:48 PM

As long as you are willing to allow your wife to hold the standards that you don't agree with on your daughter, then all will be okay.

The dysfunction will occur if you start to disagree with the way your wife wants your daughter to be raised.

Rico · #4 03-24-2008, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

As long as you are willing to allow your wife to hold the standards that you don't agree with on your daughter, then all will be okay.

The dysfunction will occur if you start to disagree with the way your wife wants your daughter to be raised.

Hang on a minute. Why should he have to defer to his wife's standards when it comes to his daughter? I am in agreement with Alex. If anything, his wife should be following him, not the other way around.

rgcraig · #5 03-24-2008, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rico

Hang on a minute. Why should he have to defer to his wife's standards when it comes to his daughter? I am in agreement with Alex. If anything, his wife should be following him, not the other way around.

I believe he's made a choice to go back to the UPC, therefore he knows what will be expected.

Just making the fact that as long as he's okay with that, then all will be okay, but if he doesn't necessarily agree with the standards then there will be some issues.

Jack Shephard · #6 03-24-2008, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

I believe he's made a choice to go back to the UPC, therefore he knows what will be expected.

Just making the fact that as long as he's okay with that, then all will be okay, but if he doesn't necessarily agree with the standards then there will be some issues.

I do not agree with the standards, but I have no trouble with teaching modesty or anything and I think standards are a good way to teach modesty. But the first time she comes home and says wearing shorts are sending people to hell and cutting hair is sending people to hell then there will be a problem, which my wife agrees would be a problem to address. She follows alot of standards without thinking they are a definition of salvation. So we are on the same page as far as that goes.

Hoovie · #7 03-24-2008, 06:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JTULLOCK

I do not agree with the standards, but I have no trouble with teaching modesty or anything and I think standards are a good way to teach modesty. But the first time she comes home and says wearing shorts are sending people to hell and cutting hair is sending people to hell then there will be a problem, which my wife agrees would be a problem to address. She follows alot of standards without thinking they are a definition of salvation. So we are on the same page as far as that goes.

Our families are alot alike JT.

TrmptPraise · #8 03-24-2008, 02:57 PM

JT,

I appreciate your spirit and attitude in this sensitive situation. It wouldn't matter what org you would be coming in or out of, the facts would remain the same. I feel you are much more of a man than some would give you credit for. Some feel you are undermining you manhood or place in your marriage. I personally feel you are showing its strength in your love and appreciating the relationships to which you hold dear. We need more men who would see these things. I am sure to be ridiculed for saying so, but it wouldn't be the first time. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

rgcraig · #9 03-24-2008, 03:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TrmptPraise

JT,

I appreciate your spirit and attitude in this sensitive situation. It wouldn't matter what org you would be coming in or out of, the facts would remain the same. I feel you are much more of a man than some would give you credit for. Some feel you are undermining you manhood or place in your marriage. I personally feel you are showing its strength in your love and appreciating the relationships to which you hold dear. We need more men who would see these things. I am sure to be ridiculed for saying so, but it wouldn't be the first time. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I agree.

Consistency will be the key.

dizzyde · #10 03-24-2008, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TrmptPraise

JT,

I appreciate your spirit and attitude in this sensitive situation. It wouldn't matter what org you would be coming in or out of, the facts would remain the same. I feel you are much more of a man than some would give you credit for. Some feel you are undermining you manhood or place in your marriage. I personally feel you are showing its strength in your love and appreciating the relationships to which you hold dear. We need more men who would see these things. I am sure to be ridiculed for saying so, but it wouldn't be the first time. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I think some men have the idea that the only way to lead your home is to take the "it's my way or the highway" chest banging caveman approach.

Sometimes the most affective form of leadership is being able to compromise when the situation calls for it. And if he is willing to compromise for the sake of harmony in his home, and it doesn't require him to break principles within himself to do so, well, in my opinion, he is a mighty BIG man!