[Barb]

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

First of all, being bored and restless in church is childish behavior...not bad behavior, and therefore has to be corrected as such. We don't spank our children unless they are deliberately disobedient or defiant. Wiggling too much during a long sermon certainly doesn't qualify as spank-worthy.

Secondly, I think that churches have an obligation to be child/family-friendly IF they are going to require that mothers attend all services with small children in tow. Quite frankly, if a woman is going to have to sit in the nursery with her infant or toddler the entire service, what is the point of her being there?

I like churches that don't have [saints who have] hissy fits when kids jump up and down with the music or occasionally make the wrong turn in albuquerque and end up where they shouldn't be.

That said.

All three of our children have been sitting tidily on the front row during worship/music since they were 2 or 3, and sitting next to us during the preaching. We expect them to stay awake, and sit on the pew. We expect them to be quiet and listen. We do not provide them with toys or books or drawing utensils or games. (Although we did when they were very small.) We accomplished that with consistency and patience. And a few mishaps. (But not too many...) There was the one time when Hannah stripped down to her diaper on the front pew until a good hearted elderly lady behind her came to the rescue (since both her Daddy and I were in the middle of music)...and the time she followed the choir into the choir loft, and I turned around to direct, only to find Hannah standing in the middle of the soprano section...Or the time Jeffrey went up to the drum cage (which sits off the platform), and was knocking on the glass/waving excitedly to get the drummer's attention.

More recently...I was helping a friend set up in back for an after-church graduation party, and I sent Jeffrey to ask the Pastor's wife a question (she was in the fellowship hall), and he went looking for her in the auditorium, right in the middle of the sermon.....LOL!!!!!! (All the way up to the front and back and to the front again, and then Pastor T said...."Jeffrey, please sit down.") (He was crushed, and that one was MY fault...I should have reminded him of where Pastor's wife was....)

Anyway...the point is...children can and should be taught to be respectful and well-behaved in church. BUT...at the same time, I don't think they should be harshly disciplined when they are simply being children, nor do I think that church needs to be pin-drop quiet at all times. (I hope it isn't....)

Two sided coin...we expect good behavior and correct it when it isn't [good], and the church should be reasonably tolerant of childlike behavior. I do not believe that all toddlers and infants should be summarily escorted to nurseries. That should be the choice of the parent, and if there is behavior occuring that requires them to leave, then so be it. If there is a significant problem with a child or children, the pastor should address it privately with the parents. Other children shouldn't be banned from service just because a few don't know how to behave.

Excellent words here, Abi...as usual. You sound like a young mother with a good on your shoulders, girl.