Divorce in the church

[Trouvere]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

He's My Friend & Trouvere,

Great posts and it is true...we need prevntative care instead of just spending our ministry putting out fires. God has given us the tools; we just need to implement them. Unfortunately this calls for a paradigm change.

Blessings, Rhoni

Amen I am all for that.Rhoni I will message you about all the good things
happening here.Its awesome.God is good.Eighteen from the ladies prision service received the Holy Ghost.


Just wondering if anyone noticed what Sister Alvear said about how people judge the divorced until it come closer to home with say themselves or a son or daughter.Then suddenly they begin to look for the loop holes in grace.

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Trouvere

Amen I am all for that.Rhoni I will message you about all the good things
happening here.Its awesome.God is good.Eighteen from the ladies prision service received the Holy Ghost.


Just wondering if anyone noticed what Sister Alvear said about how people judge the divorced until it come closer to home with say themselves or a son or daughter.Then suddenly they begin to look for the loop holes in grace.

Sis T,

Yes, I did notice what Sis. Alvear said and commented on it. It would be a much better church if we had grace going forward than looking for grace for oursleves or family after casting judgments on others before we really knew what it was like.

Looking forward to hearing what God is doing in prison ministry.

Blessings, Rhoni

[OneAccord]

I was just skimming through this thread and, with divorce being a most explosive issue with a lot of folks, I just wanted to comment on how people on this thread are being so supportive of one another. Kinda does my heart good to see people encouraging one another and helping each other heal the wounds and hurt caused by divorce. Theres been alot of good posts here but Rhoni, Trouvere, Williamsbaby. Nahkoe, Mrs LPW, and anyone else I missed, you all deserve an extra candy cane in your Christmas Stocking for making this a supportive and encouraging thread... the kind of thread that we need more of!

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by OneAccord

I was just skimming through this thread and, with divorce being a most explosive issue with a lot of folks, I just wanted to comment on how people on this thread are being so supportive of one another. Kinda does my heart good to see people encouraging one another and helping each other heal the wounds and hurt caused by divorce. Theres been alot of good posts here but Rhoni, Trouvere, Williamsbaby. Nahkoe, Mrs LPW, and anyone else I missed, you all deserve an extra candy cane in your Christmas Stocking for making this a supportive and encouraging thread... the kind of thread that we need more of!

One Accord,

I really didn't know what to say but I didn't want you to think your post had gone unnoticed. Thank-you, I think.

Those you have mentioned have been through so much that compassion is all they need and compassion is all they have to give because God has brought them through so much.

God Bless you,

Rhoni

[Trouvere]

Amen I just noticed that last post by Rhoni.I did not know divorced folks faced so much in the church.I am so surprised by how much judgementalism is directed towards them.

[TRFrance]

Originally Posted by williamsbaby

I have to admit that was one of the reasons I left the Apostolic church. the harsh and somewhat untrue teachings on divorce and remarriage.

Just want to make sure I understand...
...does this mean you no longer consider yourself Apostolic, or believe the doctrine?

Originally Posted by Trouvere

I work at a jail so I know what Wenona is saying to be true.There are however some flamers out there.The HIV rate in prisons is very high.I have
never given so much medicine in my life.The expense of it is horrible.Some of these meds are eight hundred a card or bottle.That shocks me.

I think that's one reason some of these guys when they get out of jail will go and purposely commit a crime/violate their parole so they can go right back to prison. Free medical care. Otherwise they wouldn't be able to afford those meds they need to stay alive. Ironic, to say the least.

[TRFrance]

Originally Posted by OneAccord

Another church: A young lady came to the Lord whose husband was a cheater, and drug user. He left her... divorced her and remarried. The sister was told she would have to remain unmarried the rest of her life. It was suggested, however, that she could pray that the Lord take her husbands life, so she could remarry.

Without trying to stir up too much of a doctrinal debate on this, I'll just say I believe this teaching that the innocent party still has to wait till the unbelieving/departing/cheating ex-spouse dies is an error that has caused undue and unnecessary grief in the body of Christ.

I know a sister in the Lord who really liked a fellow Apostolic brother, but he had been previously divorced (his ex was a backslider who committed adultery). Her church/pastor taught that she couldn't marry him because he was still bound to his ex-wife until she died. Apparently it left the sister in quite a conundrum.

I remember once hearing her saying "Well... I can't pray that she [the ex-wife] dies..." *long silence* *crickets chirping* ...but from the tone of her voice I got the strong impression that she kinda wouldn't have minded too much if the ex-wife did die, so she could step over the dead body (so to speak) and marry the guy. It just had a very ghoulish, creepy feeling to it.

In a couple of ways we can have some very un-Christian thoughts and desires that can result from this erroneous teaching. Essentially what we're left with is a situation where we might have:
A) "Jack" secretly waiting/hoping that his ex-spouse would just hurry up and die, so he can remarry soon, or
B) "Jill" hoping that Jack's unsaved ex-spouse would just die so Jack could now become 'eligible' to be married (to her, of course!).

Seems very wrong to me on a couple of levels, but I think we all know that realistically, it happens in the church world.

[Brother Price]

Religion has ruined far too many lives in this area. Innocent parties, those who did not break the covenant of marriage, are often treated worse than the offending party. They are left to believe that they will never be able to marry again. Lord help the ministers who endure divorce, whose spouses leave them. They lose their families and their ministries in most of these situations.

Religion kills as much as divorce does.

[TRFrance]

Originally Posted by Brother Price

Religion has ruined far too many lives in this area. Innocent parties, those who did not break the covenant of marriage, are often treated worse than the offending party. They are left to believe that they will never be able to marry again. Lord help the ministers who endure divorce, whose spouses leave them. They lose their families and their ministries in most of these situations.

Religion kills as much as divorce does.

Very true bro.

Its sad to me that some churches act like a minister should lose his God- given ministry (or at least his ministry should be seen as less credible) just because his wife leaves him. But many seem to think that way.

Hate to say it, but this is the kind of thing that makes many say that too many Apostolics seem to love doctrine, "church rules", and the letter of the law, more than they love God.

Originally Posted by TRFrance

Very true bro.

Its sad to me that some churches act like a minister should lose his God- given ministry (or at least his ministry should be seen as less credible) just because his wife leaves him. But many seem to think that way.

Hate to say it, but this is the kind of thing that makes many say that too many Apostolics seem to love doctrine, "church rules", and the letter of the law, more than they love God.

This is something you and I can agree on... all of what you said here, actually.