Living Arrangements

[ILG]

I know you're being facetious, but surely you don't think I feel that men are too weak to be moral? Do you agree that we shouldn't lead men on? Not because I will be at fault if he misbehaves, but because it is disingenuous and inconsiderate on MY part.

I think perhaps the man in a given relationship needs to draw the lines at what he is comfortable with and the woman should not cross these boundaries. This may be a different line in different relationships. I think it is too narrow a statement to say that any woman in any pre-marriage relationship should never allow a man to put his arm around her on a couch watching a movie because he is too sexual and can't take it.

Obviously I understand the concept of nonsexual affection, Emma. Rhoni is talking about a man she is presumably attracted to and/or in love with (HER definition of "lover"), so I would reasonably assume that neck nuzzling is or could easily become sexual.

In that respect, I think it unfair to play sexually with a man, call it "cuddling", and then act like he's at fault if he gets turned on. Understanding of course, that what is "affectionate" for a woman can be "sexual" for a man.

Aren't these rudimentary concepts?

They are pretty rudimentary with the exception of the fact that I find too much blame placed on women for being a "tease" and not enough responsibility on men to control themselves and draw boundary lines. If women know men are sexual and shouldn't be a "tease", men also know women can be affectionate without meaning to be sexual and don't always intend to "tease". This is also rudimentary knowledge. Perhaps I am looking for a better balanced approach for both men and women. If Rhoni finds herself a guy who wants to sit with his arm around her on a couch before marriage and he thinks he can handle that, that's his business and Rhoni's. I'm not going to over-sexualize that. On the flip-side, for young people and teens, warnings need to be sounded. Don't do what you can't handle.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Well, If I can't be a virgin again then I might as well cuddle

Hummm....

Reminder - you don't like men remember? You run them off.

You need to make up your mind!

[ILG]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Well, If I can't be a virgin again then I might as well cuddle

Hummm....

Is this second time virgin term some sort of psychological term?

[tbpew]

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

Okay, we are now back to square one!!!!!!

How long can an unmarried couple cuddle?!!!!!!! That's just not working for me. AND, since you are here - what do you mean by touching. What is a touch to you?

Rhoni,
this question has been asked previously without any reply.
Please provide what your perspective of what touching is involved when you cuddle your lover on a couch.

[ILG]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Well, If I can't be a virgin again then I might as well cuddle

Hummm....

Rhoni, what are you saying here? Call me naive or call me not wanting to eat my words having stuck up for you. If you can't be a virgin, you might as well cuddle??

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by ILG

Rhoni, what are you saying here? Call me naive or call me not wanting to eat my words having stuck up for you. If you can't be a virgin, you might as well cuddle??

You are now sucked into the Rhoni vortex!!!!

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by ILG

Is this second time virgin term some sort of psychological term?

I think it is for Madonna?

[ILG]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

You are now sucked into the Rhoni vortex!!!!

Good grief.

I am waiting for Rhoni to answer.

Rhoni, that was a very leading statement. Are you going to make me eat all my words on this thread??

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by tbpew

Rhoni,
this question has been asked previously without any reply.
Please provide what your perspective of what touching is involved when you cuddle your lover on a couch.

Thank you, tbpew!! I sure would like an answer to that question!!!!

[Pressing-On]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

You are now sucked into the Rhoni vortex!!!!