You Might Be an Apostolic Redneck If.....

[RandyWayne]

If you ever missed a best friends wedding because it was on a Saturday night and out of town and you didn't have you pastors permission to miss church the next morning, you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you ever felt guilty watching a slide show because the frames switched too fast and thus appeared too much like video, you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you ever gave up a new job in another town because your pastor did not give permission to move, you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you ever averted your eyes while walking through the electronics section of Sears because of the TV's on the wall (no matter that it was only a Sears Kenmore appliance commercial in a continual loop) you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you EVER thought someone was lost despite their overall apostolic appearance -because you caught a glimpse of elbow, you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you attended bible college expecting to graduate with a 70K a year salary, Lincoln, and prized parking spot, and being honored as "God's Anointed", you may be an apostolic redneck.

If you dated your soon-to-be wife ONLY after getting your pastors permission, and now 15 years later sorta wish he wouldn't have given it, you MAY be an apostolic redneck!

And finally, if you feel the best way to grow the church is to have as many children as possible (giving them all names with the same 1st letter of course) you may be a redneck -apostolic or otherwise.