The Wizard Behind the Curtain

[ILG]

I remember being in the world before the UPC. I felt the injustice of many things and saw the structure of the world and how it favored some over others and gave perks to some over others that didn't deserve it, that perhaps slimed their way up, or, often were simply born into their silver spoon status.

I was raised poor, with an alcoholic father who had been the illegitimate son of a 16 year old raped girl. My Dad was later adopted by a divorced man who married my grandmother. They had four more children. They worked a farm and all slept in the upstairs of a house that grew huge icicles on the inside in the winter and dripped on them in the spring. They divorced after my Dad moved out because my grandfather was having an affair and threw my aunt on the floor when she confronted him about it.

My mother grew up materially poor in a family of 14 children. They ate molasses sandwiches and slept many to a bed, covered with coats and blankets for warmth. My mother gave her cousin an empty spool of thread for her birthday. My grandfather was a commerical seasonal fisherman. My grandmother used to cry in the outhouse because she had so many children and did not want anymore, but the Catholic church did not believe in birth control and my grandfather always said "God will provide".

Compared to my parents, I grew up well off, in a house with wood heat that didn't drip on me. We had a real toilet that flushed. I got two new outfits for school every year and if we were lucky, on our back to school trip, we were allowed a cheesburger at McDonalds. (No happy meals as they were too expensive.) We ate venison and fish and garden produce.

My mother used to sing in bars when I was young and us kids often went. I talked to many a drunk on a barstool. My brother and I would stick our arms up into the pool table and pull the balls out because we didn't have any quarters to play pool. My Mom and Dad would fight as my Mom would want to go home after a while and my Dad would want to stay. My Dad used to give me peppermint schnapps on the rocks when I was young. I got drunk first at age 12 and continued the pattern until I was 19.

I saw much injustice in the world. I saw how people who were born into perfect (to me) families had it knocked. I saw how they knew the rules and they knew how to use them to their advantage. I saw how they got all the perks at school and how they were popular and how they got good grades, nice clothes, cars, money and perks.

I did some of that stuff. But I had to work very hard for whatever I got, because it was never handed on a silver platter. I had to learn the rules for myself and earn my keep.