Respect as Women

[ILG]

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

I think refraining from sex before marriage is the expectation in most denominations.

Yes, this is true. I wonder which denominations are more successful with that? I wonder if there is any way to know? I guess the real question is, which denominations create a respectful atmosphere towards women where their feelings and desires are respected and yet, men's are too? How much of this is based on biblical teaching and how much is cultural? Because, as we all can pretty well see, the larger culture often feigns respect towards women in saying women can have a career and get an abortion because it's "her" body etc. but in reality, women are often disrespected, having to carry the lion's share of work at home while working full time with kids and being expected to "hook-up" before marriage, disregarding her own feelings. Also, in the domestic abuse shelter where I worked for a year and a half, the women who were getting/ gotten abortions....it was usually not their own idea. Often it was pressure from the male who did not wan the responsibility, so it became "you get an abortion or you are completely responsible for this kid". And even the mothers of the women did this same pressure.

[*AQuietPlace*]

Originally Posted by ILG

Yes, this is true. I wonder which denominations are more successful with that? I wonder if there is any way to know? I guess the real question is, which denominations create a respectful atmosphere towards women where their feelings and desires are respected and yet, men's are too?

I'm not sure this is really a denominational issue. Probably more of a family/culture issue. Culture pervades our churches so much, in every denomination.

I think it is up to parents to demonstrate mutual respect towards each other, and to raise their children to know what that means. To teach our sons and daughter how to respect, and to expect to be respected.

[*AQuietPlace*]

Originally Posted by ILG

Because, as we all can pretty well see, the larger culture often feigns respect towards women in saying women can have a career and get an abortion because it's "her" body etc. but in reality, women are often disrespected, having to carry the lion's share of work at home while working full time with kids and being expected to "hook-up" before marriage, disregarding her own feelings. Also, in the domestic abuse shelter where I worked for a year and a half, the women who were getting/ gotten abortions....it was usually not their own idea. Often it was pressure from the male who did not wan the responsibility, so it became "you get an abortion or you are completely responsible for this kid". And even the mothers of the women did this same pressure.

There is such a breakdown in our society in all of these areas. Churches can go a long way in turning this around, for sure. If we have people who are living a committed lifestyle, and people who are willing to learn how to commit.

Older women who are willing (and qualified) to teach the younger is still a very valuable concept. Too many of the young ladies you mentioned above have never had that older, wise woman in their lives.

[Sasha]

Originally Posted by ILG

Yes, this is true. I wonder which denominations are more successful with that? I wonder if there is any way to know? I guess the real question is, which denominations create a respectful atmosphere towards women where their feelings and desires are respected and yet, men's are too? How much of this is based on biblical teaching and how much is cultural? Because, as we all can pretty well see, the larger culture often feigns respect towards women in saying women can have a career and get an abortion because it's "her" body etc. but in reality, women are often disrespected, having to carry the lion's share of work at home while working full time with kids and being expected to "hook-up" before marriage, disregarding her own feelings. Also, in the domestic abuse shelter where I worked for a year and a half, the women who were getting/ gotten abortions....it was usually not their own idea. Often it was pressure from the male who did not wan the responsibility, so it became "you get an abortion or you are completely responsible for this kid". And even the mothers of the women did this same pressure.

I wish there had been more teaching on sex when I was younger. Not from the kids at school or even from my parents. The church talked so much about how I should dress, they never taught about how I should act or how to have respect for myself.


About 20 years ago, there were three young women who became pregnant about the same time. Two of them were SS teachers and one was the piano player. Two of them were raised in the church and remain there today. Let's just say they were the ones who got caught.

[KeptByTheWord]

Originally Posted by Sasha

I wish there had been more teaching on sex when I was younger. Not from the kids at school or even from my parents. The church talked so much about how I should dress, they never taught about how I should act or how to have respect for myself.

Yes. I think way too much time is spent on how to dress/look/act... etc... when young girls need to be taught exactly what young men are thinking when they look at them, and what their bodies and actions do to the thoughts of young men who are dealing with their hormones going crazy as teenagers. And on the flip side - young boys need to be taught by the older men how to deal with their raging hormones, instead of sweeping it all under the carpet and in the end, having to have forced marriages, and unexpected pregnancies.

I am not saying this would completely eradicate the problem, but education in this area would go a long way to preventing many, many heartaches.

I truly believe too... that if more fathers spent time with their daughters explaining actions of young boys... more pregnancies could be prevented, because girls would understand that a boy's reaction to them is not that of love, but of lust, and there is a HUGE difference!