Quote:
Originally Posted by Timmy
I'm not an expert, but I think depression (true "clinical" depression) is a result of a combination of things. Circumstances (loss of a loved one, family problems, etc.) are a factor, and there are medical/pathological factors. Maybe genetics play a role, I don't know.
In my case, I was severely depressed for many years, and it got worse as time went on. And in my own case (your mileage may vary!  ), the most effective "cure" was leaving the Assembly of God church. It was virtually instant. But it wasn't 100% effective: even now, I still have bouts, but they are never as severe nor as frequent as they were before. If I hadn't left that church, I would very likely be dead by now. I'm not kidding. And again, I stress: YMMV (your mileage may vary)! 
I must also add: the actual church I left was not overly strict, controlling, manipulative or any of that, with its pastor at the time. In fact, he and I are still good friends. He's an awesome person! (The previous pastor is another story.) It was the dogma that I had to get away from. The disconnect between the promise and reality was too much for me to handle. |
Timmy, what you say here is the sad truth. Church depresses people for many reasons, leading to horrific failure and an inner condemnation where mercy is only talked about, but never really applied.
The Church stands up and tells everyone to forgive the person who has failed, but in reality they are kicked to the curb as backsliders.
My wife and I were just discussing a phone call I received recently from an old friend. After about 15 years of being a literal icon in the Church, this man wound up in an adulterous affair, losing everything. His reputation, his job, his wife and 3 children, his place in the Church, and the people in the Church.
After a very careful observation, I told my wife, "The Church destroyed this man". The reason was simple. He came into the Church a deeply troubled person, spending many years in jail. He had a horrible drug problem and his baggage was beyond bad. (My wife and I knew him, growing up in the same town as him. If the Sherriff saw him walking down the street, they would pick him up and take him into the boonies and beat him to a pulp. He was that bad.) But, he came to Church and was "Born Again".
This led to the "Rags to Riches" story and the fanatical praise that we give those who have "Changed". Well, the Pastor began to use him behind the pulpit. He became a minister way too soon, IMO. He led the jail ministry. I was always trying to get him to go fishing or camping. Something besides just WORKING. But from my own experience, I know what happened. He couldn't say NO. It was God's Work. People expected him to perform; otherwise his glory bubble would pop.
It did pop, and now many years have passed and when he called me he was beyond broken. I personally feel that depression grappled this man down, but he internalized it. Fear kept it inside, so he trudged through another day until the kettle blew. The pressure was so great that carnage was everywhere when the top exploded.
Oh they can blame him, but God forbid the Church would admit, "We put too much responsibility and pressure on a man, and failed to allow him to express his heart in total honesty".
This is why Pastors fall. This is why many church people fall. We cover our depression with an emotional experience in Church, and don’t give enough attention to the doldrums of everyday living. We fail to tell people, say NO. Don’t do something just because everyone else is doing it. Be unique. Be different. If you sin, welcome to the crowd, yes, the CHURCH CROWD.
We tell people, let's break free of fantasy and embrace reality, and yet, the Church becomes the Fantasy.
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